I recently became paralyzed. I know people around me care, but if I tell them I'm ok, they just don't listen to me. I was scared being paralyzed would change me, but friends have told me I'm still the same person - as did the guy I love. But earlier, I got drunk and the guy who's told me more than anyone, I'm still the same person, has made me feel like a complete stranger. He treated me more differently tonight than any other time, and talked to me like I was a child, telling me not to get drunk etc, mainly because I had a headache and stuff - before the paralysis, this wouldn't have bothered him. I feel like he's going to be like that every time I feel ill, or any other time I get drunk etc...I love him, (and my friends too) but I don't think I can handle being lectured or questioned everytime I do something I "shouldn't" simply cause I'm not sure how to. Why is he seeing me differently now? And how do I handle the change in how people talk to me and behave toward me, especially him?
2006-12-01 15:11:28 · 8 answers · asked by tahanni 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This question hit's home...sorry if my life get's involved in this one...I have been in wheel chair for a while and the newness has warn off for my ex husband, friends and even some of my family.
It sounds like your boyfriend cares so much about you and he is new at this to so he doesn't know how your body is going to react to drinking now. He is scared for you and this is his way of showing it. Talk to him about it get everything out and then if you still have questions ask a support group or someone you feel safe with. Please be glad that you still have someone who loves you and cares for you.......good luck
2006-12-01 15:24:27 · answer #1 · answered by faith m 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am very sorry for your mishap.
However you need to wake up and pick up the pieces. Do you used to behave like this before the incident i.e. getting drunk and all that? If no then you should not be surprise why everyone is fussing all over you.
You then should be more indipendant prove to everyone you can do what every normal ppl do i.e. go to work, do charity, go shopping and etc. Ofcourse this is easier said then done.
U can always get your guy to support you not "baby you". This will create a stronger bonding.
Good luck.
2006-12-01 15:23:10 · answer #2 · answered by Rosy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think you should appreciate they're intense concern. i know it feels like they're treating you like a baby and it gets annoying. however, keep in mind that this special treatment is not only unusual for you, but its different for them too. you should never allow paralysis to disrupt your way of life, but you have to admit that it's definitely a change. its hard to accept any help and assistance from anyone sometimes, but you can't handle everything by yourself now. this doesn't only relate to your situation, but to almost everything. we all occasionally need help and i think your boyfriend and your friends were only worried about you. they would simply react the same way to anyone who was ill or needed extra care. that's just my advice. perhaps you should tell them that you're still the same independent person you were before the paralysis. you are grateful for their concern, but they need to calm down with that and cut you some slack if it's seriously becoming a nuisance.
2006-12-01 15:24:14 · answer #3 · answered by angela l 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Because others can see what you do not see and love you and would not want to see you hurt yourself in anyway. So far as for the drinking take their advice cause you are only hurting self. When you change some of your doing, also your friends are gonna change how they treat you.
2006-12-01 15:17:59 · answer #4 · answered by JoJoBa 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
well since you are in such an unfortunate state, people are goin to try to be espicially careful with you and they are all just tryin to make sure that you are ok... if you ever have trouble handling there compassion, think of it like this, imagine you had no one who cared or looked after you, be appreciative of those who are near, cause others arent as fortunate and you can be in a different situation where you didnt have anyone who cared
2006-12-01 15:17:27 · answer #5 · answered by fatalbert167 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that it's just going to take some more time for people to adjust. I think that they're acting this way because they are concerned. Try and talk to everyone and tell them that you are no different than you were before.
2006-12-01 15:15:45 · answer #6 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is just afraid his world has just changed almost as much as yours has.... give him a little while to adjust
if it persists.... smack the shi" outta him
2006-12-01 15:17:14 · answer #7 · answered by konig_charger 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
YOU HAVE CHANGE AND THE ONE THAT DONT LIKE IT WILL MOVE ON
2006-12-01 15:17:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋