here are some cool blonde jokes, enjoy! pass em on!!!!!!!!!!! no offense 2 blondes!!!!!!!!!?

Question

here are some blonde jokes pass them on!

Blonde LOGIC

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking........ and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"

The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida...?????"

CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?"

He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"

She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"



SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"



RIVER WALK

There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,

"How can I get to the other side?"

The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."



AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left cheek and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?

"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."



KNITTING

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.

Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"

"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"



BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"

The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"

The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.

To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"



IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"

She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"



THE BLONDE JOKE TO END

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.

Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"

HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"

Answer 1

cute loved it lol lmao lol lmao

Answer 2

haha i have some more if you want em

ORANGE JUICE
Why was the blond staring at the orange juice carton? It said concentrate.

THE COKE MACHINE
There was a blond who went up to a coke machine. She put a quarter in the slot, pressed the button, and out came a Coke. She puts another quarter in, presses the button, and out comes another Coke. She repeats this action several times. Soon a line begins to form behind her, because it's a hot day, and people are yelling, "HURRY UP! WE WANT OUR COKES!" and she yells back, "NOT WHILE I'M WINNING!!!"

THE 'TELEVISION'
One day a blond goes into an appliance store. She goes up to the clerk and asks him if she can buy that TV. He says, "I don't sell to stupid blonds." That night, she dyes her hair black, then the next day returns to the appliance store. She goes up to the clerk and asks him, "Can I buy that TV?" He replies, "I don't sell to stupid blonds." That night, she dyes her hair red, and the next day goes to the appliance store once again. She says, "I'd like to buy that TV please." and the clerk responds, "I don't sell to stupid blonds." Then she says, "How do you know I'm a blond?" and he replies, "That's a microwave, not a TV."

THE JEWELRY STORE
A redhead, a brunette, and a blond are in a jewelry store after closing hours. The police surround the store, thinking somebody is trying to steal something valuable. There are only three hiding places, and limited time before the police come barging in. The redhead hides behind a bag of cats, the brunette hides behind a bag of mice, and the blond hides behind a bag of potatoes. So the police break into the jewelry store and check for intruders. One police officer says, "There are three bags. We should check them out!' So a police officer pokes the bag of cats and the redhead says, "Meow, meow." The police are like, "Oh. It's just a bag of cats." So they poke at the bag of mice. The brunette goes, "Squeak, squeak." The police are like, "Oh. It's just a bag of mice." So then they poke the bag of potatoes. And the blond says, "Potato, potato."

Answer 3

A blonde is rowing a boat in a cornfield. yet another blonde drives by and as we communicate gets offended. "Dammit!" she yells. "it quite is blondes such as you that supply us a bad call. If i could swim, i might come available and kick yourass!" If a blonde and a brunette the two leap off a development on the comparable time, who hits the floor first? The brunette, reason the blonde has to ask for guidelines.

Answer 4

Hahaha. Two thumbs up for the good blonde jokes.

Answer 5

You do know why a blonde can't make ice cubes, don't you? She doesn't have the recipe!

LOL.

Thanks for the laughs, and have a great weekend!

Answer 6

Funny jokes! I hate ti when blondes can't laugh at ourselves!

Answer 7

Ok. Yep. This blonde could see a funny side to your jokes.
But who's more 'blonde'?
Me, a natural blonde, or the brunette who goes to the hairdresser to get her hair blonded to look like mine?
I'm so flattered, she wants to be just like me :)
;) ;)

Answer 8

i really like the jokes but i hate when ppl write about blonde, y cant it b brunets or something. u think it fair to the blond girls, cuz i sure dont.

Answer 9

Those jokes are really good but no the funny point of laughing. I did very much enjoy reading them but they never made me laugh. Thanks and Happy Holidays!!! :)

Answer 10

i lyk i lyk i lyk!!!!!! i could c me and my 1 friend saying those 2 each otha....especially the 1st one, the finger 1, and the moon 1.
♥

Answer 11

That is really funny. I needed a good laugh. : o