Having Sister-in-law problems!!?

Question

Ok, so here's the problem.....she is always asking my mom and I to babysit. I can say no, but my mom can't and I feel she's being taking advantage of. When we do watch my niece, she goes out and drink, smokes and parties and usually comes home as drunk as a skunk. I feel like when we babysit while she goes out that we are supporting this behavior. When I say no to babysitting she makes feel bad like I don't love my niece, but I do! I just want my sister-in-law to grow up. It's fine to go out on occasion and have fun, but this is taking place two to three times a week. My mom comes home exhausted from being there until the wee hour of the morning. How do I convince my mom to say no sometimes and how do I make my Sister-in law understand that I do love my niece.

Answer 1

Your niece will grow up and remember how wonderful you were to her.

Answer 2

That isn't your biggest problem. She has a real problem and intervention may be the answer her. Refusing to babysit will only force her to find someone else, perhaps someone who will not be the best company for your niece, to step in. Intervene, check her into rehab and help her with parenting classes. You can do this now for her or let the county step in later and take your niece away. All your sister in law has to do is be drunk, one time, and get caught and your niece will be taken out of her home. Your family will have a hell of a time getting her back because, after all, you all sat by and did nothing while this woman created an unfit living situation for that child.

I know it's tough, I see it all the time. Do something now.
And, going out and getting drunk or stoned or high and staying out until the wee hours, even once in a while, is not ok once you have a child to look after. Those days are over. That is what responsibility means, doing what is in the best interest of the child in spite of your own wishes.

Please don't lose your niece because you are afraid of creating a situation with your sister in law. She's already in one, up to her neck.

Answer 3

Tell her to watch her own kid! The child will suffer not having her Mother around. Your Mom is letting her know that going out and partying instead of watching her kid is OK. Tell your sister-in-law I love my niece that's why I can't watch her! She needs more time with her Mom.

Answer 4

She knows you love your niece...she is just using that to give you a guilt trip. If she tries it again when you refuse to babysit...tell her if SHE loved her DAUGHTER, SHE would stay home and tend her! Besides...it's okay to babysit now and then, but you nor your mother had this baby, so neither of you should be responsible for her other than the parents

Answer 5

Mom needs to say NO. you are being whats called a enabler indirectly you are helping well your mom is helping her to be less responsible of her own duty's as a mother the sister in law should have thought of the consequences before having children.baby's take time and sacrifice. talk to mom explain to her that it hurts the whole family. and she should consider saying NO.

Answer 6

Where is the babys daddy? You need togo to her and put your foot down! Tell her and him that your mom works and she didn't bring this child in to this world and she should not have to raise her. I would also inform her that drinking and hanging out should NEVER come befor her child.

Answer 7

INTERVENTION!!!!!!!!! your mom raised her kiddos, so that is not right!she does not need to be around her child drunk. sit her down sober and tell her you are not going to take it. You dont mind once in a while but that she is a mother and needs to be at home raising her child, not being a party girl

Answer 8

your mother needs to stand up for her self i understand sister in laws small threats of oh you don't love you niece /granddaughter crap that is a ploy to create guilt