why does the csa not take into consideration the facts why the family got broken up in the first place?

Question

My hubands exwife had an affair forceing my husband to live somewhere else .meanwhile she got in touch with the csa to claim money from him even though he still played a part in their upbringing .We met and things got worse . she expected him to provide for the children but then stopped him having any contact so he had to go to a solicitor which cost more money. This went to court .The children were dumped with her family while she went out on so many occasions that both me and my husband applied for custody as we were both in employment and could support the the children without any benefits and could give the children a secure and stable home.The day of the court case the mother stated that she could support the children without any help from anywhere and had a stable loving home for them. As u know the courts favour the mother over the father in these cases so she got custody. in fact the children were homeless as their mother had spent h b on fun.Why does this info mean nothing

Answer 1

The courts can only make decisions on FACTS - not on what one person or another says or accuses. Due to past cases, they favor the mother as, historically, women/mithers were more nurturing. This, of course, has changed over the years but there has to be a starting point. If you are paying a lawyer and he's not advising you to obtain sworn statements, then he's not worth the $$. If you truly want custody and if you truly know that the mother is leaving the kids and not caring for them (this does NOT mean that she went out for one overnight "party" and you happen to know of this one occasion) on a regular basis, then it is up to you to get SWORN, WITNESSED statements saying so. The family services do not have enough workers to be following each and every family member of each and every case. It's a damn shame that people get married, have kids out of LOVE and then, when it's over they get selfish and the kids suffer. This is not a time for EGO , self-righteousness, one-upmanship. This is a time to be honest and think about what is best for the kids and what do the kids want?! If you can PROVE that your jobs are stable, that your home is clean and safe, that you have appropriate child care when you're working, that the kids prefer to live in your home, and that family members on the mother's side agree with your assessment, then you will be successful. Stop fighting and start negotiating.

Answer 2

there's only one hope for depression. That is an effective anti depressant medication. Depression comes from a checmical imbalance in the neurotransmitters and the brain and nothing in the world will alleviate unless you compensate for it. The right medication will do it. When you're depressed, you're unable to interact with a therapist by talking or be with or around anyone so talk therapy won't work. Being around people is a waste because the loss of interest makes it difficult to tolerate company and again, verbal interaction. You will have no desire for pets or taking care of animals as it's too labor intensive, too complex and your mind can't handle it. Excercise requires motivation which you have none. Until you can compensate for the chemical imbalance that's causing the depression and anxiety, none of these suggestions are useful.. Once you regain your sense of motivation and desire to do things, only then can any interaction or activity possibly help feel good.. There are ssri's, snri's mao inhibitors and trycyclic anti depressants. Some work better than others depending on the individdual. It is frustrating until you find one that works well with tolerable side effects. If none of these are ever an option, try ect (shock therapy)l

Answer 3

The CSA was set up by Thatcher's government with the primary objective of saving money by reducing dole payments made to single mums on account of the money they would get from absent dads. Tony Blair, being a Tory, did nothing to change that basic paradigm.

They don't give a toss about the mums or the kids or the dads or the circumstances.

Answer 4

I hate the CSA.When I split up with my partner we decided that we didn't want to get them involved.When I informed them of this decision I got interigated like it was some kind of criminal offence.The fact was me and my ex had come to our own arrangements for him paying money for our little boy and didn't want them getting involved as they have a really nasty habit of making things worse and c**king up.But I had to justify why I didn't want them involved.Its our right as parents to say whats best for our child/ren.
I would pursue this matter,I really would.The CSA are an absolute joke who couldn't run a cold bath or a pi** up in a brewery.Get as much evidence,seek legal advice.Do whatever you have to(as long as its legal and above board)but those children need you to do it for them.They deserve and need to be in a loving and stable family,which is what you can provide.
Good luck with it all.x

Answer 5

The Child Support Agency (CSA) is only interested in one thing; getting money from one partner and taking their time to pass it on to the other. They CAUSE more problems than resolve them.

You're not the only couple going through this problem - I know of others. I wish you all the best though.

Answer 6

Because the reason the parents split up has no baring on the cost of their upbringing.

You said you applied for custody because you could afford to keep them without benefits - er call me old fashioned but what about love? and who do the children want to live with?

Answer 7

Because the CSA are simply not intrested in the facts.
Wish me luck im in court soon just to get reasonable access to my children. £5000 pounds down already,at this rate i wont even be able to afford to rent my batman outfit to join the fathers for rights campain. It aint always us blokes fault !!!!!!

Answer 8

Hire a private investigator and a really good attorney and go back to court. The children need you and your husband.

Answer 9

your husband needed to bring proof to court that she can't take care of the kids he need someone that would go before the judge and tell them that they know she isn't taking care of the kids. the courts don't want to take the kids away from their mother. but in this case they need to send someone to her house and see how the kids are living. he don't need to give up on getting his kids.

Answer 10

csa? Confederate states of america? i didnt know they still had a bureaucracy