Now the coven say I must sacrifice her on the altar to be forgiven. What should I do?
2006-12-01 06:10:59 · 44 answers · asked by SilentRunning 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Just wear the shirt since Santa and Satan are one in the same.
2006-12-01 06:13:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Thank you, thank you, SilentRun for making my day and cheering me up. I haven't laughed this much since, oh, at least yesterday. I agree with the consensus that your mom is (a) very tolerant (b) very sweet and (c) nowhere near as daft as you might think. Let's hear it for all those long suffering moms out there who have to put up with offspring who (a) need to lighten up, (b) get a life and make some genuine friends and (c) have their I.Q tested.
Oh, I am assuming that this is a joke question. You don't really love Satan and belong to a coven, do you? If you do then I'm really worried for you and the advice given above applies. Can't wait for the next daft question - keep 'em coming!
2006-12-07 22:55:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
With the addition of some rather graphic illustrations, you can make it clear in what special way you love Santa. Then I´m sure the coven will forgive you
2006-12-01 23:08:06 · answer #3 · answered by comradelouise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In ancient Jewish tradition Satan is simply an angel doing the work that God assigned to Satan to do.
The word Satan means challenger. With the idea of Satan challenging us, or tempting if you will. This description sees Satan as the angel who is the embodiment of man's challenges. This idea of Satan works closely with God as an integral part of Gods plan for us. His job is to make choosing good over evil enough of a challenge so that it becomes clear to us that there can be only one meaningful or logical choice.
Contrast this to Christianity, which sees Satan as God's opponent. In Jewish thought, the idea that there exists anything capable of setting itself up as God's opponent would be considered polytheistic or setting up the devil to be an equally powerful polarity to god or a demigod.
Oddly, proof for The Christian satan/devil mythology is supposedly found in the ancient Jewish texts that were borrowed to create the bible. One can’t help but wonder how Christians came up with such a fantastically different interpretation of Gods assistant Satan in their theology.
Other hints about Satan’s role in human relations can be seen if you look at the name Lucifer. It’s meaning in the original tongue translates as Light bearer or light bringer. Essentially the bringer of enlightenment. The temptations of the Satan idea bring all of us eventually into Gods light. Hardly the Evil entity of Christian mythology.
Love and blessings
don
2006-12-02 02:27:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your coven sounds as if it's let a bit of Christian influence creep in there with all this talk of love and forgiveness. I don't think they're as Satanically pure as they should be. Can you trust them? If it's gone this far, I guarantee very soon they'll all be getting themselves baptised, proclaim themselve born again and spend their time pointlessly copying and pasting bible passages in the comments sections all over 360 land.
Anyway, f.uck them. I'm Santa this month. Don't you love me?
2006-12-01 12:36:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good for Mum seems she knows already what your up to watch she don't sacrifice you instead.
What should you do well how about a substitute like your head man of the coven tell him he has been chosen bet he wouldn't like it.
2006-12-05 09:05:59 · answer #6 · answered by Rod T 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sacrifice the Coven. She's a good Mom.
2006-12-01 06:13:42 · answer #7 · answered by Tom B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Buy her a dictionary or a pair of glasses. Santa will forgive her I'm sure. But will satan?
2006-12-08 03:54:32 · answer #8 · answered by ManoGod 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Give your mom a plane ticket to Italy. She'll have a nice vacation and you can tell your coven that the earth opened up and swallowed her whole.
2006-12-01 06:12:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Im a fella so i cant say "if i were your mum" but i would sacrifice you with a belt round the ear and a kick up the A.S.S you stupid little sod and whatsmore does your mum do all your running around, wake up mum you got one there
2006-12-05 00:44:07 · answer #10 · answered by srracvuee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋