I need help getting my girlfriend back. It's a strange situation. We both live in the same apartment complex. I see her everyday and we communicate with each other each day also. However she's seeing this other guy now and it's really bothering me. When we were together, I moved to slow and really didn't express my feelings to her. I was a bit unsure of wheather I wanted to get deeply envolved with her. So we parted ways. Now I've found that I truely love her and want her back, but now someone else is in the picture. We still date and stuff and she does this right in front of this other guy. It's a crazy situation. I know the guy comes over and spends the night with her. Many times she comes up to my apartment and visits me while he's down stairs. Right now getting ready to see her for lunch. My question is, how can I get her totally back? She knows I love her, but she says at this point she's torn between the two of us and doesn't know what to do.
2006-12-01 05:49:47 · 21 answers · asked by Northstarr 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She is using you
leave her
She knows how much it must be killing you, why doesn't she leave you alone. How could she do that to someone she cared for ?
2006-12-01 05:56:18 · answer #1 · answered by Yeah yeah yeah 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What makes you think things will be different now? You were moving too slow (in your words) in the beginning of the relationship and now that she is with someone else you are jealous of the situation, cannot stand to see her with someone else, thats it....She also knows this and now she is in a position where she can play you like a fiddle because she knows you want her and I bet she thinks you will do just about anything for her....Man, dont get played and be fooled....You had your chance with her and now its gone.....If both of you felt the same way about one another then the breakup would never had happened but now that it has, it wouldnt be THAT complicated in getting back together
2006-12-01 05:58:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
back off - find someone else to date and if she really wants you she'll come after you. make yourself scarce, increase your social value by seeing others instead of her. Don't make yourself too available.
Seems you did this to an extent but you've put yourself in the friend zone.
The other choice is for you to be really powerful about efverything. Sweep her up in your arms and tell her she goes near another guy again you'll kill him. Be passionate, show your feleings, promise your undying love, send her flowers, love letters, messages over the radio. Go for it like she's the one. AS LONG AS YOU ARE SURE SHE IS.
Otherwise you blew it already.
2006-12-01 07:17:12 · answer #3 · answered by charlie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your call, but if I were you, I'd probably try talking to her 1st. Express how you feel, be honest. Don't try hiding yourself in.
Just put it out on the open and let her decide.
It's worth taking that risk for a simple fact you'll know that you at least tried. You won't spend time wondering with "what if's".
If she thinks that it wouldn't work out, or if the feelings are not mutual, than positively, move on. Respect one another's decisions, and keep good relations.
Good luck!
2006-12-01 06:01:33 · answer #4 · answered by Random22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing you can do during lunch is ask her out for dinner again. Think of it as she is only dating the other guy to make you jealous. Have more confidence...let her know that you have been occupied with work but recently got that out of the way, and you want to spend more time enjoying life now. During lunch ask her if she likes to travel, and talk about your wishes and plans to travel to all these places. But don't imply that you are talking her with you yet.
Don't talk about the other guy either.
2006-12-01 05:55:19 · answer #5 · answered by desperatehousewife 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple really...Just tell her that she has to chose either yourself or the other man as you are not willing to used in this way for any longer.. You risk losing her altogether, that much is true, but you deserve more than "half a person"..I know you are hurt by all of this but the truth is that if you are going to lay down with "doormat" written across your forehead..then thats exactly the way you'll be treat..
2006-12-01 06:14:41 · answer #6 · answered by kimknowsbest 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, you say that you didnt express yourself enough and mayb that is why you have like grown apart and made a better relationship now. What i would do ifi was you is, show her your sure, express everything, amaze her with something so great she wont know how to say no, just make sure she gets that, she is it for u and that its her or nothing and let all your feelings out! i know it sounds really cheesy but jus do sumthin amazing u would be surprised!
2006-12-01 06:05:55 · answer #7 · answered by ann 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the first thing is not to show you're jealous. That might be the determining factor in you losing or getting her. What you need to do is show her that you live a good life without her. People are naturally drawn to other people who have good lives. We want to be where the good stuff is.
So by going out on dates with other people, you'll show her you're the one.
2006-12-01 05:59:09 · answer #8 · answered by bmusementpark 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Northstar you have to be upfront on this one this poor girl is confused no mistake a good heartto heart is needed here for both yor sakes over dinner or lunch would be ideal her feelings need gathering one way or the other but you have to help her now you have to prove your commitment to her for her to have hope time is of the essence here .if she loves you like she says you have to act quick and be firm and honest . good luck
2006-12-01 06:01:10 · answer #9 · answered by not a mused 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't go there, it sounds too complicated.
think about it, if she had feelings for you then she wouldn't be dating this other guy.
i think she likes you as a friend and likes the attention she gets from you, you're sort of a back up for her, she knows how you feel and she knows you'll always be there if things don't work out with the new guy.
harsh words i know...but true.
stay friends, that way you won't get hurt.
2006-12-01 05:55:22 · answer #10 · answered by jade317877 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is it me or u realized u loved her only after the other guy appeared in her life? it's typical... you realize what you had the second you lost it.
about getting her back... well talk to her explain how you feel and that you made a big mistake by letting her go. everybody deserves a second chance right?
2006-12-01 05:54:38 · answer #11 · answered by sea_star 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋