jokes?????

Question

any1 have any little johnny jokes???

any other jokes 2

Answer 1

Little Johny greeted his mother at the door after she had been out of town all week and said, "Mommy, guess what? Yesterday, I was playing in the closet in your bedroom and Daddy came into the room with the lady from next door and they got undressed and they got into bed and then Daddy got on top of her and..."

The mother held up her hand and said, "Not another word! Wait until your father gets home and then I want you to tell him exactly what you've just told me."

The father comes home and the wife tells him that she's leaving him. "But why?" croaks the husband.

"Go ahead, Johny, tell Daddy just what you told me."

"Well," said little Johny, "I was playing in your closet and Daddy came upstairs with the lady next door and they got undressed and they got into bed and Daddy got on top of her and they did just what you did, Mommy, with Uncle Bob."

Answer 2

Little Johnny's teacher said for him to meet him after class. After class, the teacher said to Johnny, "Johnny, I have a feeling you've been cheating off of Mary on your tests. Here, when the question was 'Who was the first president', she put Abraham Lincoln, and so did you."
"Sir," Johnny said, "everybody knows that. I read that in a book."
"But," the teacher says, "Another question was, 'Who was the first president?' She put George Washington and so did you."
"Sir," said Johnny again, "I read that in the same book!"
"Here," responded the teacher, "Here the question was, 'Who was president during the Louisiana Purchase?' Mary wrote 'I don't know' and you wrote 'Me neither'

Hope that helped.

Answer 3

A teacher asked her students to use the word
"definitely" properly in a sentence. Lil Susie goes first
and declares "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher
replies "It's cloudy, today Susie ... the sky is actually gray." Bobby goes next by saying
"The grass is definitely green", to which the teacher corrects him "No, Bobby .... it's late autumn and the grass is actually brown." ......
Then Lil Johnny asks a question "Teacher,
Do farts have lumps in them" ? ........
The teacher gives Johnny a very stern look,
and says in firm voice "No Johnny, they don't" ! ........
Lil Johnny replies back "Then I DEFINITELY shitt my pants" !

LOL

Answer 4

In Moscow, there was a party..during the party, a man whispered to a man nearby in a very low tone..
the man: Plz, sir..r u from KGB??
nearby man: ( astonishingly ) no..sir..I ain't from KGB
the man: Is someone from ur family working for KGB??
nearby man: no , sir..no one from my family works for KGB
the man: Do u have some relatives from KGB??
nearby man: ( surpirsingly ) No, sir..
the man: Do u have any friends from KGB??
nearby man: ( curiously ) no, sir...why??
the man: ah..if so, u r stepping over my shoes...