Im a slightly overweight purterican/black mix who talks like a white guy and cant speak spanish. And the way I talk changes based on the people im with at the time. When im around certain black people i tend to act more urben (sometimes they can tell its an act) and when im with white people i talk more suburben (and yes i know that makes me a doush) People say "just be your self" but when im with my friends I get too loud durring conversation (like highpiched) and most of my jokes are kind of corny (some are good though). Latly ive been told i need to start trying to talk too women more and get a girl friend (which i havent had since sixth grade) but im getting mixed messages about what women like. On one side people i talk too say women want you too just be yourself, but that seams in stark contrast to what women in the media and magazenes define as what they want. I went down the list and I know that at the moment i dont have many of the features they desire. So what should i do?
2006-12-01 01:13:54 · 21 answers · asked by esplin227 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Be yourself
2006-12-01 01:19:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are being anybody other than yourself, you are lying to everyone, including yourself. You will feel much more comfortable with yourself if you just be who you are. Talk how you talk, dress how you dress. Who cares if your voice gets loud? People who decide whether they like you or not based on that are shallow and you don't want them as friends anyway (they are not real friends). And bring on the corny jokes, some people love them! (I tell them all the time.)
As for women, you cannot judge the ones near you by the fake media and idiot Cosmo-reading chicks out there. If the ones that you actually meet want you to be yourself, then that's what you should be doing. If some chick in the media who you're never going to meet wants something else, that's ok, you'll never meet her anyway. Besides, most of the women I know of who have lists of desirable traits are single, or are happily in love with someone who doesn't even match those traits, but has something more important inside them. (If you ever actually meet one of these silly women, give them a list of traits you expect them to meet and tell them which ones they don't match. None of us can live up to that kind of silliness.)
You might find out that who you really is is a great person. Go for it.
2006-12-01 01:25:02 · answer #2 · answered by julz 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The right woman with think you are wonderful just the way you are! Don't try to be someone you're not or to mold yourself to fit others' expectations. While it might seem easier in the short term, in the long run it's really the best option. A relationship with someone based on a "false" you will not last--and you risk the possibility that as soon as you show the "real" you that person will no longer want to be in a relationship with you. You may have to wait a while for the right person to come along, and it will require a certain measure of patience, but I really believe that it is worth it.
2006-12-01 01:20:28 · answer #3 · answered by radioflyer57 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being yourself is hard to do when you don't know who you are. You don't have to "act" black to gain respect to blacks, or "act" white to be a white person. They'll all accept you for whatever you want to be like. You have a lot of possibilities in life ahead of you. Being a mixed race you have more chances to make anything happen than just being black or just being white. You'll grow into it. Have fun, and be happy.
2006-12-01 01:22:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dont sweat it babe! Just be yourself....nobody likes a fraud! Even if youre loud and tell corny jokes theres someone out there that will love you for who you are.
And another thing....I live in Texas. Do you know how many Hispanics there are down here that dont know a lick of Spanish??? Dont feel bad!
2006-12-01 01:20:03 · answer #5 · answered by Cuteness 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes. Be yourself. No matter what you are, who you are, or what you feel like, God will love you just the way you are. He created you to be unique from others. Be Christlike, but be YOU! Just follow His footsteps. If you are copying someone else, you are fooling yourself. You will then realize that being you is better than being known for someone else you are not.
2006-12-01 01:21:35 · answer #6 · answered by hellofriend! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
apple just made me smile lol ...
but i think you are getting the message here, be yourself ... you dont want someone to love you then realise that isnt the real you do you ?
there is someone for everyone honestly
my husband is a grump , rarely smiles ... is a little angry at times ... but i love him because he is not pretentious , he is who he is and that is what i fell in love with
( and he has a little belly )
i wouldnt change him in any way
2006-12-01 01:25:07 · answer #7 · answered by Peace 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you can be yourself, be proud of yourselve since you are not the one that created yourself be contented with what Almighty God gives you and make sure you have confidence in yourself while talking to women or anyother persons. cheers!!
2006-12-01 01:25:40 · answer #8 · answered by Atobiloye Z 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a huge chubby chaser. meaning, I like my lover with a bit of chunk on them! like big teddy bears! I love being with a bigger person! very very sexy! hell yeah, now I'm all excited! I bet you're way way cute! My mother is Puerto Rican, I don't speak Spanish either!
Trust me, you'll be fine in the real world, lol. Just be your high-pitched, obnoxious self, and people will love you or hate you, but let them!
2006-12-01 01:21:54 · answer #9 · answered by apple 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You need to decide who you are then be it 100% of the time. Don't decide who you are lightly, think about it long and hard. Once you recognize you own likes dislikes, comfort zones and mannerism, you will be comfortable in your own shoes.
If you like you then the ladies will like you.
2006-12-01 01:19:00 · answer #10 · answered by Axel M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
stop stressing out....and don't go looking for girls, there's bunches of them, why work that hard??
just keep doing things you like to do (out of the house) and you'll meet someone (female) doing the same stuff and you already got something in common.
when they say 'be yourself"...say ..'i am' i'm the type that tries to blend.
and go about your day...nothing wrong with that.
2006-12-01 01:19:18 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋