I have recently lost someone I loved sooo much and still don't understand why. she broke my heart when I offered her nothing but all the affection, love, attention, care and support she could ever want! I treated her as best as I possibly could- honourably and respectfully .I would have done ANYTHING for her and she knew it.
I dont understand why girls take advantage of us sensitive guys! It seems apparent to me that the guys who neglect (and show very little affection/emotion) to their girlfriends are often the most happy in relationships! why?????
2006-12-01 00:29:48 · 36 answers · asked by L666 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
As a sensitive woman, I have to ask why men do the things they do. Your not the only one who has these issues.
2006-12-01 00:32:27 · answer #1 · answered by Asia 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain but don't let it destroy your confidence, you are a better person then her. She didn't deserve you and sod it, move on and don't try too hard next time.
I have done a lot of work on human ego and here is how it goes:
Human modern day love (not true love) is usually controlled by the ego.
The ego is an entity which is totally controlled by the need for "more". More money, more possesions, more people, more compliments………..it is hungry, starving almost for 'more'.
When you meet a person they give you that 'more' that you have been looking for, They fill that hole.
In you case you gave her all the love she wanted and needed and you filled that 'hole' in her ego, satisfied her craving for 'more'……….temporarily
But the 'ego' can never be satisfied for long. If you give her everything the 'ego; will soon be dissatisfied and want to continue it's futile and endless search for 'more'.
They key is to not fill that ego void all the time. Drain it, let it go empty and then fill it with love and joy, then withdraw etc. Soon she will be mad about you, the constant fluctuation between ego emptiness / fullness will keep her happy.
The mind is a strange and immensely complicated entity. Do not take it personally. Just try not to be controlled by your own ego and enjoy the cosmic dance of life.
Thing, people come and go. The nature of the world is impermanence. Accept that and all your dreams will come true.
2006-12-01 01:45:34 · answer #2 · answered by abluebobcat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it's ufair that some women will actually do this. I think I have a few answers for you, my answers don't come from personal experience it's from a few observations I've made. I would never mistreat a guy who treated me with nothing but respect and made me feel like a million dollars.
Women usually do it because they actually believe that if a man is so good to her then it is too good to be true, and they often feel as though they don't deserve the attention.
Some women I know actually do it because they themselves were heart heartbroken when they felt like they they were giving their heart to the perfect guy, then all of a sudden he didn't want her any more, basically some women just like to get revenge, and often nice guys like yourself end up paying the price for some jerk who wasn't even worth the time of day in the first place.
Here is the worst reason of all some women like guys who are rough around the edges, even though he may mis treat her, some women prefer to feel type of relationship, maybe it's because they feel they don't deserve someone who will do whatever it takes to make her happy, or maybe they like some drama in their lives avey now and again.
And some women are just not ready for that kind of relationship, maybe some women are not able to cope with that level of commitment. They may feel things are getting too serious. Or some women actually end the relationship because they believe that they will eventually be heart broken, it just saves all the heartache and pain.
I'm sorry you are feeling down, I hope that things will get better for you soon. Take care, all the best.
xx
2006-12-01 01:16:31 · answer #3 · answered by nicky_bronx 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think this works both ways. I think that there needs to be a balance in personalities for it to work, you have to be like-minded. If one person is stronger and sees the other as weak or needy they may resent that, and want someone stronger and independent or more level headed. You just haven't met the right girl. Some people hate to be smothered. You should find someone who will love being cared for and protected an loved by you.
Not all girls like they whole 'treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen' thing,
You could have frightened her off or been too much for her, it may have pushed her away. try to understand the individual and if you get bad vibes from something that you are doing, then change tack...i am not saying you should change yourself, just take notice of body language and tone to help you not over do the sensitive caring thing as some people may find it to overbearing or mummy's boyish.
2006-12-01 00:59:19 · answer #4 · answered by Estee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain bro' but it may be that there were other issues at large in the background.
Possibly she was only out of a long restrictive relationship with someone else and needed a bit of time to herself to adjust to being single and get her own identity back before she put herself back in that position again with you. Some people need that and they will respect you more for giving them the space no matter how much you want to see them. My current girl moved straight from a very long relationship to me and it was fine for a while but she never had the time to herself to break the ties with her past so she could move on. So as much as it pains me to do it I am giving her that time now because she needs it if we are to have any future. Maybe this is where you and your girlfriend are at.
It may seem to you that she is taking advantage of you but it is really only her subconscious fighting for a bit of breathing space to decide her future with a clear and balanced mind. I,m sure she loves you but give her a chance and things should work out ok in the end
I wish you and your girl luck and I hope you work it out down the line. If she really loves you she will realise that soon enough and she will find you again. Don't worry about it in the meantime, it is out of your hands
2006-12-01 01:05:14 · answer #5 · answered by Yeah yeah yeah 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude......I'm afraid to say that you've answered your own question there. You said "I treated her as best as I possibly could....". Maybe that wasn't enough for her.
Just because we are giving ourselves entirely, that doesn't mean that we are offering the right level of love and appreciation.
It's a hard lesson to learn an dthere's a fine line between being Mr Sensitive and Mr Mean & Moody.........variety is the spice of life and some girls just want to be kept on their toes. (Not all girls, mind!) A little mystery goes a long way in relationships.
Good luck in future.
2006-12-01 00:37:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear about everything you're going through.
Unfortunately it's just something that happens...men take advantage of women on a regular basis (not all men, just alot of them) Most women you ever meet will have been taken advantage of at some point so when they come accross an 'easy' target in a man it is often a natural reaction.
2006-12-01 00:46:40 · answer #7 · answered by sunshine_honey69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you were a bit too nice for her and she became bored with it.
I usually treat women the same way I used to (and still do) treat my little sister. Most women's first dealings with men would've been with a brother or father and the way I see it, they wouldn't expect their brother to treat them nice all the time. If they don't like it, they're not my kind of girl and I'd probably find them boring because I like to have a giggle.
I used to tease my sister something rotten at times, but she doesn't hate me for it now that we're both grown up.
It doesn't do any harm to take the piss and wind up a girl every now and then, it makes a relationship fun if you can have a laugh at each other sometimes.
2006-12-01 00:43:50 · answer #8 · answered by Gilligan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get really annoyed at anybody taking advantage of anybody...its difficult enough finding love...never mind true lasting love in this world. I would love to find a sensitive guy who..as you said...gives me affection, love, attention, care and support PLUS treats me honourably and respectfully..after 31 years...I haven't even come close to that..almost ready to give up..
2006-12-01 02:51:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Dear frnd! You are thinking wrong.
If you really love a girl and you think you are right at your place then i believe that there should be a proper reason behind the fact that she left you.
And don't think that being sensitive is a negative thing. It's the most wonderful thing that one can have in his nature.
You are sensitive and if you have a pure soul trust me you will find your true love. As far about that girl..... we can't be so sure why she did like that.
i would pray to god to bring your true love to you as soon as possible.
1 more thing --- You did your best to her......... so you will get the best too !! It's True.....
Good Luck !!
2006-12-01 00:38:54 · answer #10 · answered by shon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two millenia of man-domination has fuelled a lot of anger in women. Although I do not condone the treatment of women as subspecies, many man-haters think it's okay to torment men in return. Look around you, 'girl-power' thrives.
Women like that (not all) are just as cowardly as men (not all), they don't go up against assertive guys, they torment nice and sensitive ones like yourself.
Maybe you were too nice to her very early on in your relationship. It shows that you have a good, gentle heart and that is why you should learn to protect it from harm. Next time try being respectful and fair at first, then when you're sure she's going to appreciate, show her the love and care you're capable of.
2006-12-01 00:36:09 · answer #11 · answered by sapfarah.geo 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋