I have a guyfriend that is really going through some tough times now. Recently he was arrested because of an altication that he had with his son. He's 37 and his son is 16. He son "bucked" on him one night we he was told to get ready for bed - it was a school night. So they exchange some words and I guess some blows. His son pulled a knife on him. Well since his son's mouth was bruised - my friend had to go to jail that night. He was release the next day.
Ok. Well over the holidays my friend got his place together so I could come over after I got home. When I was over there that's when I found out he had to go to an eviction hearing this past tuesday. So I felt like a bomb twas dropped on me because 1) He didn't tell me this 2 weeks ago when he told me that he got to go to court after the christmas holidays because of the altication 2) this was the 1st time that I ever been to his house and I felt that I was being using. BTW - We have been dating on and off for about a year now.
2006-11-30 11:28:39 · 16 answers · asked by gloried 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
So last night night and tuesday night i was calling him to see what was the outcome of the eviction hearing. I finally spoke to him last night because I kept calling him because I had a flat tire and needed his help. So I asked him what was the outcome and with attitude he said WHY ARE YOU SO CONCERN about the outcome. Then he finally told me that he has to move. I asked him when then he snapped on me and said it doesnt matter I'm trying to help you. So by then I was pissed. So I told him I called a tow truck to tow my truck home. Well he said that he'd come over to change the tire but it wouldnt be anytime so and to call him when I get home. I did he said he would be over later I was like ok.
No Call no show. So I left a message on his vm that he hurt my feelings by asking ne why do I care and about not showing. yes I was crying because I have been through a lot with him and I said some other derrugatory things. All in all I told him f-u and your feelings.
2006-11-30 11:36:39 · update #1
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I'm sorry for the confusion -- I'm just very upset right now.
Yes I care for him and he haven't ask me to move in with me -- yet. The reason why I asking if I was inconsiderate because he is having a tough break now and I went off on him. Although its not my problem but I just felt he was wrong for snapping on me when I was showing concern.
2006-11-30 11:45:42 · update #2
@ baset - he called me last night but I didnt answer because I was upset which I knew it would lead to an argument. So he left me a message and basically told me I was tripping and my actions are a turn off.
He just dont understand how it feels to care 4 someone and get shut down for reaching out - He also said that he was still going to my company's holiday party and he hope that I want be acting like this at the party,
2006-12-01 16:27:45 · update #3
Is he trying to get you to let him move in with you? If he is, say NO. I don't understand what exactly you are asking. What did you do that you are asking if you were inconsiderate?
2006-11-30 11:34:54 · answer #1 · answered by bestfriendthemom 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think that if you just have to decide if dating the dude is worth it. Do you think that he is liar and will continue to lie about things, or is he geniune and just having some tough breaks in life you know. I mean if he is lying then you need to ride out cause those are major things to be lying about and so you know I wouldnt even bother with it and if he is just going through a time I would inquire about it and see what he says, if he is pushing you away I mean leave him alone let him get his life together, and just be the best person, or friend to him that you can. Things will come to fruitation either way.
2006-11-30 11:35:49 · answer #2 · answered by dl_williamson 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You may be getting in way over your head..as nice as you seem to be, please don't let this guy's HUGE problems become your own..no matter who's at fault here..
UPDATE 12/01
Any improvement with the guy friend? Did he ever call back after not showing up? I know people like to judge you for caring for a man like this, but it's really not their call. They don't understand unless they've been through it. All in all, don't blame yourself or feel that you are inconsiderate. He has a lot to deal with that are not your problems and you deserve a friend that is not going to shoot you down for trying to help. Hang in there..keep me updated. Good luck.
2006-11-30 11:31:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
But, what did you do? You're asking whether you were inconsiderate, then you described how you felt, but you didn't describe any of your behavior. How did you respond to your feelings? What did you say to him? Actions and/or words can be inconsiderate. Feelings are internal, and are not inconsiderate. If you went ahead and did something without considering how doing that would affect others, that would be inconsiderate. We can't tell whether you were inconsiderate, because we don't know what you did or said.
2006-11-30 11:39:47 · answer #4 · answered by robertspraguejr 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What did you do that was inconsiderate? You said how you felt, but you didn't say what you said or did.
It seems like your guy friend has some problems. Just my opinion, but I would be careful.
2006-11-30 11:32:40 · answer #5 · answered by the Boss 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Save yourself!
2006-11-30 14:25:26 · answer #6 · answered by sugar_deee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just love these complicated ridiculously-long, meandering, single-sentence questions that no one can possibly answer! How the hell can we offer any kind of reasonably good response when we have no idea about the situation?
2006-11-30 11:31:36 · answer #7 · answered by drsteve362005 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
what is your problem?
did he ask you to let him move in with you?
why havent you been over to his place before?
what is your question?
do you care for him?
does he care for you?
do you feel right about this?
you have the answer to the question.
look inside yourself.
is this relationship going anywhere?
2006-11-30 11:40:04 · answer #8 · answered by russell s 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why the hell would you date a guy who beats his kid and is getting evicted? Are you really that desparate?
2006-11-30 11:31:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I would find out just what other little secrets he is hiding!
2006-11-30 11:31:35 · answer #10 · answered by valerie_mantle 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋