An American soldier, on the train form London to Liverpool, shared a compartment with two English brothers, one of whom was hard of hearing. They stuck up a conversation, and one brother said, "I say, yank, where are you going?"
"Liverpool," said the American.
"What did he say?" asked the hard-of-hearing brother.
"He said hes going to Liverpool. Tell me, yank, what brings you all the way to Liverpool?"
"I have a girl friend up there."
"What did he say?" asked the hard-of-hearing brother again.
"He said he has a girl friend there. She must be quite a girl if youll travel all the way just to see her."
"Ill say she is!" said the American. "She wears black boots with spurs, carries a whip, and indulges in every delight known to man."
"What did he say?" asked the brother who was hard-of-hearing.
"He said he knows mother."
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2006-11-23 22:12:28 · 13 answers · asked by Janey 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Two friends decided they would beat the draft by having all their teeth pulled. They knew the army would not take them if they were toothless. Finally the day came when they were to report to the draft board. As they lined up they were seperated by the big truck driver who obviously had not bathed for weeks. When the first friend stood before the sergeant for a physical examination he told the sergeant that he had no teeth. The sergaent ran his fingers around the mans gums and said, "All right, you have no teeth-youre 4F."
Next came the big, smelly truck driver. The sergaent said, "Whats wrong with you?"
The truck driver replied, "I have a terrible case of piles."
The sergaent inserted his fingers in the truck drivers *** felt around, and said, "Yes, indeed you do; youre 4F."
Next came the second friend, and the sergaent said, "Whats wrong with you?"
The recruit stared at the sergaents finger. "Nothing, sergaent," he said. "Nothing at all."
2006-11-23 22:17:07 · update #1
nice 1
hahahahahaha
dont tell it 2 a blonde though, it ll take her ages to get it, cos theres a blonde friend of mine who woz jus lukin at my screen, and have jus finished explaining it 2 her
2006-11-23 22:23:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
perchance for Moslems. although i imagine each day is a reliable day spiritually speaking, in case you've were given your wits about you and get excitement from being alive. on the different hand, i will't see something quite non secular about kneeling, chanting, making a music hymns, or something else with a gaggle of human beings further occupied to the exclusion of the international and idea, no matter if in a progression or out of one and in spite of what certain day, or position, or time it really is. to each and every his or her personal, to the volume they are able, i assume. some favor help, regrettably.
2016-11-29 10:19:40 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SUPEURB if i do say so myself, bit long but loved it.
my mum called BID TV last night for an electric blanket, her volume on her mobile was high so i could here it all, the man said
"hello, im Andrew from bid tv, are you a member?"
"yes, but i cant renember my password" mum said
"ok your password is ********"
"oh and my username is ********"
the man said "ooh, SQUIFFY"
honest to god, that is true.
squiffy
2006-11-23 22:24:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES!! Best stuff i've had all day. super! 10/10
2006-11-23 22:35:46 · answer #4 · answered by ibro999 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not bad, not bad at all, I will pass these on to many
2006-11-23 22:34:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
funny
2006-11-23 23:19:54 · answer #6 · answered by Mary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very funny...
2006-11-23 22:25:34 · answer #7 · answered by mulguy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
surrendered
2006-11-24 01:45:33 · answer #8 · answered by stone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Super :-)
2006-11-23 22:20:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
very good!
2006-11-24 01:30:19 · answer #10 · answered by markhatter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋