i know you are going to say "they come as a package" but im curious to know whether men really do mind
2006-11-23 19:59:59 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You know, it's usually the nicer guys that mind, which sucks. Because a nice guy thinks, what if I become really involved and then it doesn't work out, I'm going to be hurting her, and the child...
But also there's a real problem with some women trying to "rope in" a guy. From what I've heard on the radio is that if you even lived with someone with a child and then break up, she can claim child support, because even though you're not the father, you acted as a father figure. So because of stuff like that we're also a little bit scared.
So if a guy is really into you, it won't be a problem, actually if your kid is well behaved, it might even be a bonus, but the problem is that many guys won't even give it a shot because of the possible complications.
I think the biggest thing here is confidence. If you show a guy that you're perfectly happy as you are (even if that's not 100% so) and that you want him because you like him as a person and not because you want to find a father figure for your son/daughter, or get a second stream of income, then he might actually spend enough time with you to get to know you and take things from there.
Good luck.
2006-11-23 20:15:45 · answer #1 · answered by yishor 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-18 06:37:53 · answer #2 · answered by William 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-01 01:29:44 · answer #3 · answered by maisha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey kiddo,
Most men don't mind the child ... Many ignore the child. What they care about is what the birthing process did to the women.
Does it show that you've nursed?
Some women stand up to child bearing much better than others. Some young women just walking down the street look like mothers.
Don't sell your child short ... a child should be alot more than simply "not minded." Sorry, I know you knew that,
2006-11-23 20:25:15 · answer #4 · answered by Sam 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I'm going to date a woman and she tells me that she has a child BEFORE I date her then I don't mind but if she has a child and she will only tell me after years of dating, then I will not continue dating her because in my mind I know that she hasn't been sincere and honest. At the end of the day it's not something that you should hide and it's something that can be done by mistake and mistakes can be done by everyone, because we humans are subject to mistakes. The most important thing is that she will tell me that she has a child before we start dating. That is what matters to me most.
2006-11-23 23:31:25 · answer #5 · answered by Falcon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It didn't bother me (although I thought it would). It was, however, a very steep learning curve going from the MOST single bloke with no responsibilities to taking some of the responibility for a kid. It took a bit of time to establish the relationship with the child as we got to know each other and develop the dynamics of our relationship. Best thing I ever did.
2006-11-23 20:16:20 · answer #6 · answered by sid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends solely on the individual. Some guys don't want the package deal and will shy away from it.
My husband met me just after my divorce and I had two kids from that marriage. He wasn't scared off and loves my children as if they were his own. My kids adore their step-dad.
I know that I am one of the lucky ones, but I know that there are other good guys out there who are lovingly willing to take the package deal.
Just be sure and be picky. You don't want a jerk looking after your kids.
2006-11-23 20:07:58 · answer #7 · answered by thezaylady 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most men dont mind at all, as they realise that even if they dont now, they will eventually want kids and they know already that you are good 'mother material'. Those that do mind havent quite grown up yet and realised the bonus of this, either that or they are totally sure they do not want kids!
2006-11-23 20:05:32 · answer #8 · answered by Unhinged.... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No body wants to take a liability.Will a woman take a man with kids?Normally No.This is the case with long term relations or marriage.For short term men may not mind having sex with women having child.There may be exceptions ,but rare.
2006-11-23 20:12:34 · answer #9 · answered by leowin1948 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In my experience - I would have to say no! they dont mind. I have a boyfriend who is not the father of my child and doesnt have kids of his own and the relationship has grown from strength to strength and so has the bond between him and my son. Please dont involve your kid when you are dating , it causes unstability and confuses the child. you dont want your child to grow up with issues, so date as much as your heart desires and when you meet that special one - then introduce him to your child and if he values the relationship , he will fully accept the package( u and mini u!)
2006-11-23 20:18:43 · answer #10 · answered by leezo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋