I just got out of a 3 year relationship w/ someone because there are no feelings there anymore. Me and my ex didn't have sex for 4 months.
I've been working w/ this one guy for also 3 years. We're both managers in the same company. I've never looked at him to be intriguing but we went to a going away party together and ended up kissing in the parking lot. Now I want more. He has a girlfriend of about 5 years, but that doesn't phase me at all. I don't want a relationship from him, just a little fooling around here and there. Kinda like friends w/ benefits. He has agreed on doing the same w/ out anyone finding out. I don't find it to be wrong as long as i'm safe about it. But is this wrong on either part?
Please only people 21 and older respond.
2006-11-23 16:14:50 · 23 answers · asked by natural blondie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
friends with benefits is the bomb!
Problem is it never stays that way.
goodluck.
I'm your friend right? (give me a ring)
2006-11-23 16:26:43 · answer #1 · answered by cruddypantz 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I will answer you from a moral objective standpoint, so you can take it, or leave it. You will be getting into a situation that you do not want to be in. And yes, it would be wrong on both of your parts. Cheating on his, and backstabbing on yours. This would be a great way to screw up a part of both of your lives, and this will also be a great way to make some significant enemies. Go fool around with someone else. Friends with benefits is cool, but only when both friends are single, or at least don't have a 5 year relationship with someone. If he even thought about doing this, he doesn't deserve her. Have you no compassion or feelings for the moral aspects of this situation?
2006-11-23 16:20:49 · answer #2 · answered by CJ Major 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm 19, but I am going to answer. This is harsh, but I'm going to call you as I see it, you are a cold-*****! You don't find it to be wrong that he has been in a committed relationship with another woman for 5 long years and you come along slutting it up and want to ruin it?!! You cannot possibly think that you can be his lover on the side and they can still have a healthy, lasting relationship?? It will ruin your friendship with him, your working environment, and his and his girlfriend's relationship.
Women like you make me sick, you make all of us women look bad. You also are the sluts we have to worry about sleeping around with our men! Get a life and find your own guy--WHO IS SINGLE!
It absolutely sickens me that you do not find this morally wrong in any way...and when you say it doesn't "phase" you at all..shows me you have no feeling or heart.
2006-11-23 16:27:14 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Fooling around with someone at your job is a big NO-NO! If things just don't go well, it makes your job environment uncomfortable. Plus, have some morals, what if you were ever the other chick? Can't totally blame you, the dude's been with the other girl for 5 years, and he's willing to take a chance a blow it? Tells you a lot about him! Sorry to sound mean, but it's truthful!! If you both were single, I'd say GO FOR IT!
2006-11-23 16:24:51 · answer #4 · answered by sue d 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How would you have felt if your ex did the same thing when you were together? Try putting yourself on this guy's gf shoes for a moment.
Even if this guy is ready to give you what you want(he is wrong in doing that too) its not correct on your part when he is with her. This should be okay only when he is single too not until he has broken up with his current gf.
And you really don't need anyone's advice or approval on this... you also know that this not correct on either's part.
I hope you sort this out in the right manner.
2006-11-23 16:21:13 · answer #5 · answered by prashantpachauri 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
People like you make me sick. You are not thinking of the girlfriend, only your selfish ways to satisfy your sexual pleasures. You just remember, you will have karma to pay back for your selfishness. You and the guy deserve each other. There is no such thing as no one finding out. Some one will see you and tell the girlfriend. You better hope she isn`t the type that will beat your a**. You want someone to just f**k go find someone who isn`t involved.
2006-11-23 16:19:35 · answer #6 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes!!
Answer this question then think about considering it...
Why would he be with this girlfriend of his for 5 YEARS if he didnt have strong feelings for her?..
Imagine you being with a guy for 5 years and then have him go and have someone on the side. How would you feel when you found out? Oh and trust me, she WILL find out, I've been there and done that way too many times.
2006-11-23 16:19:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
WHAT DO YOU THINK????!!!!!! YES IT IS WRONG!!
It is extremely wrong morally. You are the other woman!!! I wouldnt recommend seeing this guy at all!!! What happens if you develop serious feelings for this guy and he does the same, you hook up and become a couple!! He was happy to cheat on his current g/f of 5 YEARS with you so what would stop him from cheating on you with someone else. You have already condoned it!!!!!!
Find someone who isnt commited and "fool around" with them! Keep your hands off someones man!!!!!!
You are a discrace and its peole like you that set a bad word for the rest of us NORMAL and LOYAL women!!!
GROW UP AND GET A LIFE!!!
2006-11-23 16:22:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
yes its wrong on both parts...yours because you may be single but you know that he isnt and his part cause he isnt single. if he wants this friends with benefits thing between you two, then he should let his girlfriend of five years know.....before the deed is done. its only right to her. he needs to think of someone other than himself when he is in a relationship. even though you are single, you wouldnt want the roles reversed now would you. this is coming from someone whose relationships were mostly with guys who cheated on her....and one was married....only he denied it when i asked him. take care and good luck. the pain isnt worth it if it can be prevented and in this case, yes it can be prevented...on both parts.
2006-11-23 16:20:46 · answer #9 · answered by sherryw_1978 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Crash management at its best ...is the word you need for you and your friend...
he has a girl-friend 5yrs... leave the guy alone..
fooling around... no committments..which part is not wrong...
..sure everyone is going to find out... what do you care...
except for your best friends girl-friend....then where is your friend going to be......not your friend ..or..talking to you.!!..
... when the dunk..aroo's hit the fan... what does phase you...
who caused the 3yr relationship to end ..and why..??.
2006-11-23 16:25:32 · answer #10 · answered by david 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen friends with bennys never works you guys will start to compare them to each other real boy/girl friends and ever time either of u get in a fight with b/gfriend youll have sex. Pretty soon every one will know and the s#!t will hit the fan.
2006-11-23 16:20:09 · answer #11 · answered by Justin T 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋