i broke up with him when i was 6mths preg.(found out some really bad things about him...long story) Anyway, the baby is now 3.5 mths old and the sperm donor just called asking to see him. I asked if he had any intention of contributing money for the baby and he said no. I feel that financial responsibility is a major part of being a parent and why should i bear all the monetary burden and he sits back and does nothing. i think my son would be better off without having this dead beat in his life. By the way, my son is his 6th child and he does not pay for the other ones either. opinions....
2006-11-23 15:13:59 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Good point... I say... hammer the @ss for child support... as for the people who wanna judge... go screw yourselves...
If he isn't forced by the court to pay... he will continue to do it...
and why in the hell should he get only the good times... while you have to deal with the bad...
if you don't want to take him to court for it... leave him be... if he gave a d@mn about his child (other then seeing him/her) he'd be willing to support him/her...
Kick the man to the curb... you don't need him... neither does your child...
--Just love your child... raise him with that love... and when he/she's old enough... you can tell him/her what a dead beat worthless piece the father is...
Also... as for taxpayers supporting the child... the idiots a bit misguided... if you wanna be mad at ANYONE who may or may not receive money (i.e. welfare, medicaid, etc.)... Be pissed off at the father (sperm donor) who does this to women (and the children) and continues to do so... you freakin' dumb @$$ idiot...
2006-11-23 15:43:29 · answer #1 · answered by grimmy19812000 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Child support is very easy to obtain. You basically go to a parenting center and ask them for help. They will refer you to someone. You fill out a bunch of paperwork and give it back to the court. You don't have to contact your ex or have anything to do with him. The court will send him papers 1-3 months after you filed. He will be set a court date and you will both have to appear in court. If he doesn't show up they can arrest him. And you can choose the time you want the child support to begin. Say the child is 4 years old and he never paid child support, you could have him pay you from day 1 or for just one year. It's all up to you. But don't be scared to do it.
2006-11-23 15:32:08 · answer #2 · answered by natural blondie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do like I did....Force him to be a man....Go down to the court office and file for "abandonment." It will ask you a few questions to see how much money he's given you in the last two months and then you'll have to pay about $20, it would be helpful if you had his address too. Then once that is done, they will issue a warrant for his arrest, and both of you would have to go to court and set up child support that way, it's a bit easier to do it this way, rather than going directly through child support enforcement, because this way he has to pay or go back to jail.
2006-11-23 15:39:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I had a hard decision to make for my daughter when she was only 4 months old... I left my husband. We had to survive without his income or financial support, but we did it. We had food stamps for a while, and lived on what little money my job brought in. I had to move in with my mom with an infant, which was not easy. I also had to severe all ties with my ex... otherwise, his alcoholism would have just kept driving me and my daughter down with him. That was nearly 8 years ago. I have never regretted my decision to tell him to go away if he wasn't going to commit to being a part of her life. I told him it wasn't ok with me for him to be a part-time dad, and I wasn't going to allow him to do that to my daughter. I haven't spoken to him in nearly 5 years, since the last time that he "promised" he would send money and letters to our daughter- and never did. Now, I am remarried, to an incredible man, who treats both my daughter and I like princesses, and we have a second daughter together. Believe me, prince charming is out there somewhere, and you are far better off without the deadbeat weighing you down. You are right... it is a financial burden- children cost a lot to care for. So you have to make a decision... because you can have the money without his involvement. Go to court and petition for child support. If he contests- he'll have to take a paternity test, and once it is determined that the child is his, then the court will order payments (which you can have garnished from his wages if he refuses to pay). Or, if all that involvement is too messy for you, just move on in your life without him. You can make it on your own. Sure, it may not be fair, but you may be way better off in the long run! Good luck!
2006-11-23 15:26:05 · answer #4 · answered by dolphin mama 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well first off i would be taking him to court for child support so he would either have to pay it or go to jail. Then after that i might would think about him seeing the baby but i wouldn't want my child at 3 months old to be out of my sight.
Tell him if he cares then pay up then he can see him....Maybe
2006-11-23 15:16:56 · answer #5 · answered by ஐ♥Julian'sMommy♥ஐ 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Oh, this is an easy one...it's called CHILD SUPPORT, hello. Every state, every single US of A State has a department who will locate the dead beat, asses his earnings and assets, determine if he is the paternal parent (if he contests it) and collect the child support, you do nothing except keep them informed if you know of changes, they will track him down for you even if he quits a job to get out of paying, they will find him when he starts another job. I have three kids and I get a check direct deposited every two weeks and I never speak to their dad! Good luck and remember, child support isn't for you, it is for the support of your child! Contact them!!! Check online for your state child support division or enforcement office.
2006-11-23 15:26:39 · answer #6 · answered by poppyflower 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If i were you and this was going on i would talk to an attorney because he should at least have to pay child support for the children if he wants to see them. I don't feel it is right that he wants to see the child and yet not support him. that would upset me also if i were in your position. I hope everything works out for you!
2006-11-23 15:19:46 · answer #7 · answered by Matts 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to consult with an attorney to assist you in obtaining court-ordered child support. If you cannot affort one, check with your county's Legal Aid. Also, many counties have Family Law Facilitators, that will help you with paperwork and some advice. Good Luck.
2006-11-23 15:19:40 · answer #8 · answered by Barb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him he can choose one of two options..
1. He gives up rights to the baby and has nothing to do with him..
OR
2. Make him pay child support and get to be in his son's life.
2006-11-23 15:32:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
welcome to my world i divorced my daughters dead beat dad and she was 1 and she didn't see him until she was 3 and then he decided to come back into her life without paying the child support and now she's 14 and still i haven't seen one penny from him. so if he hasn't payed by now then he wont. and taking him to court wont change anything as well.
2006-11-26 14:19:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋