help me toilet train my daughter!?

Question

My 2 and a half year old daughter is brilliant at using the loo to do a wee but, when it comes to poo, she refuses to use it, doesn't tell us when she needs one and consistently fills her pants with poo.

I need some suggestions to help remedy this please?

we've tried both of those first 2 suggestions, neither works!! She seems to revel in pooing herself and still demands the 'rewards' that we have attempted to bribe her with in the first instance! (she doesn't get them though!)

Answer 1

well, peeing is different, i am goin threw the same thing, i take my daughter tothe bathroom half hr after she drinks something, but would rather poo in her diaper than on the toilet...im not sure why, i always assumed it was cuz it took too long, and her arms got tired from holding herself up, poo is alot more personals then pee, they feel comfortable doin it in theirn diapers cuz its familair! like wise for an adult, wouldnt u rather go pee than poo at a resturnate? or a new bf's house? olr a public bathroom? its all about feeling comfortable... dont scould her for doin this, then she will never want to go poo, show her its ok, most parents take their children with the to the potty, when they pee to show them its what ur supposed to do, well do the same thing with the pooing, show them its ok to use the potty for both... just give ur child time..


another thing, i have read in numerous articles, parents use their childs favorite character to influence potty training, write aletter under the name of character(s), asking the choldto use the potty, put the letter in anenvelope and put it in the mailbox, put a picture of the character inside the letter , and have ur chold acompany u to get the mail, so they see it is actually in there, and read the letter to them, keep the letter short and simple...

Answer 2

At two and a half, this isn't unusual. Training pants are the way to go for now! All the suggestions about praise and reward schemes are perfectly valid, and may help, but some children are just not ready at this stage. Try not to obsess over it - I totally understand where you're coming from, my son wouldn't poo in the toilet until he was four, and I was SO stressed over it. We tried all sorts of things, then one day he just shouted "I did a poo in the toilet" and that was that. It's a stage she'll get through, they all do. The one thing I would say though is stop making too big a deal of it to her - reinforce the idea that it's a good thing to do it in the toilet, but kids are very smart when it comes to figuring out what's guaranteed to push your buttons, and it could become a control thing.

Answer 3

I've heard that until the necessary brain connections are in place that there isn't much point in trying to train them anyway, you just have to avoid freaking them out which is counter productive.

It sounds like your daughter is happy to use the potty for a wee all the time. I guess it's just a matter of being patient and going overboard the first time it happens.

There is a school of thought that you get the poo and put it in the potty and get the child to sit on it - like a chicken and egg. Not sure this is reliable but some people swear by it.

Answer 4

A long time ago, as she is now 27!, my daughter was like this. She was dry before she was 2, but still pooing in her pants at two and a half as your daughter it.

I'm afraid i gave up with the softly softy approach. I told her that it was disgusting, that i didnt like cleaning up after her, that she should use the potty or loo and that i knew she had time to tell me first (a genuine accident is another thing). I used to scoop her up, pooey pants and all, dump her in the bath, strip off pants etc and using the shower head rinse her bottom clean with cold water! Yes COLD water, not nice warm water. After a few times of this, she quickly learnt that it was easier all round to go in the potty and have mummy pleased and clapping, rather than cross mummy and a visit to the bathroom for a cold shower off!

Sorry if other parents think i am cruel. I am not at all. Children of two and a half are perfectly capable of being clean and dry (unless ill or have other physical problems). Sometimes a bit of strictness is necessary.

Good luck.

Answer 5

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Answer 6

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Answer 7

What is a good idea is to let her see you pooing in the toilet and say ' look at mommy shes a good girl having a poo on the toilet would you like to try this is what big girls do. ' hope you have some luck.

Answer 8

When she goes pee, ask her "are you going to go poo in the toilet like a big girl too?" Maybe she just doesn't realize that both pee and poo go in the potty. Maybe you just need to get her used to the idea that both are for the potty and then give her some time and she should get it. Good luck and God bless :-)

Answer 9

Bribery works. :) We kept a jar of M&Ms as a potty reward jar. If he peed in the toilet, he got one M&M. Pooping earned him 3. He was trained in no time.

My mother swears by the method of having the child potty train a doll or teddy bear. The child 'teaches' something else to use the toilet--explaining how and why and showing how it's done.

Answer 10

going poo is very difficult for a child it is normal for her to feel nervous about this..even tho uh she has already successfully used the potty to pee in. Because BM is a solid..it adds often adds fear to child..they often believe their insides are coming out. it scares them because it is so different from pee. (i know it sounds crazy..but think in 2 year old term..what they see is...she sees solids..part of her inside coming out..)..Alos too, they tend to feel they don't know how to go poo, becasue it is a different sensation from pee, and also more difficult to grunt out!..Watch her signs to see if it looks she is about to go poo...help her to the potty..don't be angry or impatient..she will feel much more relaxed and trusting if you are calm throu out this..She will likely have a few more accident for ab it..or even start to hold her movement in...this phase will pass in time..and she will be going ON her own before you know it. But right now..her body and mind can not come to terms with going BM on the potty yet.