My kid is 9. I feel very uncomfortable with this because I am not with them and my kid (as any other kid) could drown. How do you respond to these types of requests?
2006-11-23 14:23:11 · 24 answers · asked by Cas 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
I dont think its rude, But just explain that you would like to be there with them, or your child cant go. I personally wouldnt let my 9 year old go without me being there. You cant rely on others to pay attention all the time.
2006-11-23 14:27:33 · answer #1 · answered by Blondi 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
If I feel the other parent is trustworthy I let my daughter go. You can't be there all of the time, and you never know if your child is going to drown, get hit by a car, or any number of things when you are there.
Maybe give the other mom a heads up on some things your child likes to do or isn't careful enough with. Like running near the pool or splashing to much. Make sure to ask if the children are going to be supervised the entire time. Be safe but not to overprotective.
2006-11-23 22:32:30 · answer #2 · answered by Becky R 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I did not let my kids go with other people known to me or not, until they were about 11 when I knew they were all pretty competent swimmers and now I still keep a watchful eye over them
You can never be too cautious when it comes to safety.
I wouldn't even think twice if another parent judged me harshly for my views as my children are my responsibility and no one elses.
A sensible person would respect your views as it is only natural to be protective over your own.
I would suggest that the friend could come and play at your house instead doing some other activity.
I do not think the other parent is rude, but lives by different rules to you and that is ok, but don't give up your principals to please anyone else.
2006-11-24 01:51:20 · answer #3 · answered by Sara 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are uncomfortable with your child going swimming without you, then that is your perogative. You are free to make any decisions you want with your own child. Don't feel bad or uncomfortable with your decisions. I don't really think that's it was rude of them to ask because the other parent obviously sees nothing wrong with this. Just let them know as politely as possible that you would rather your child not swim without you there to supervise. Tell them that it is nothing against them and that you are sure that they would supervise your child just fine, but that if something did happen, you would rather be there and be the one responsible for it. The other parent should understand and respect this. HTH!!
2006-11-23 22:34:01 · answer #4 · answered by tiggerabf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you could accompany them and supervise the swim time so that you feel more comfortable, and also definitely make sure your child has had swim lessons, and knows pool safety. your comfortability level is huge in a situation like this, so maybe you could be there, and as you get more comfortable, allow your child to go alone.
make sure there is always a lifeguard at the pool or beach where they will be swimming, or an adult present at the residence where your child will be. any good parent will probably identify with your concerns, and being open and honest with other mothers about that will help keep your child in the safest environment. Good luck!!
2006-11-23 22:28:41 · answer #5 · answered by njchica 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow...you sound a tad bit over-protective. Why is that rude? I know you're probably nervous b/c he's with friends, but your son could drown in a swimming pool while you're watching him! If your son was like 4 or 5 I could see you being really apprehensive, but jesus christ let the kid live a little! If you're so damn nervous about it then why don't you take the kid's swimming yourself.
2006-11-24 01:02:12 · answer #6 · answered by tangyterp83 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO WAY!! I would never do it! They will never watch your child and care for your child the way you would. Drowning can happen in a matter of seconds and can sometimes appear like they are just swimming, but YOU would be able to tell the difference. Take him yourself. Your child will resent you if you say he can't go swimming with his friends. If you restrict him too much, he might do it in the future without you knowing like I used to have to do with my mom because when I was younger, my mother would never let me go swimming at a friend's house because "I could drown" It wasn't until I actually almost did drown twice for me to realize why she said what she said. Take him swimming yourself. You could regret it, maybe not this time, but maybe even years, maybe never, don't take the chance. When your child has kids someday, he will remember how you worried for him when he worries for his own kids.
2006-11-23 22:31:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If it's a pool I would say ok. If it's a lake I would say no way. My son is also 9 and I would feel very comfortable if he went to the pool with another mother that I trusted because he can swim like a fish. Also at a pool there are lifeguards. He's your baby, do what makes you comfortable but don't hold him too close, it could end up making him needy.
2006-11-23 22:26:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, I had to deal with this as a Single Parent while in Military Housing -- and the situation was exacerbated when the parent doing the asking (and begging me to then watch her children all the time) was an Alcoholic ... and not caring for her children properly.
this parent next door (who would drink her meals and NOT watch her kids) kept DEMANDING, Pleading, and everything else -- bugging me to 'watch' her kids (or demanding that MY children play with them) just as I was returning home AFTER a long work day with MY own children who ALREADY went to their after school activities.
The word "NO!" works -- and keep saying NO!
Do you really want the liability for having to watch and care for the child of another while you are trying to spend some quality time with your own children? Do you want to have to transport them, feed them, make sure that they are safe, that they are within your sight, and then take them back to their homes (only to find that the parent who did this to you is out having a good time on their own and NOT there when you return) ....
This is VERY Rude, and an imposition. It is one thing to do this once in a while, but when it comes at you everyday (and this woman would do this quite often), then There is a BIG PROBLEM -- and it is NOT you for REFUSING to take their child with you (or having to say NO to their 'taking' your child with her)!
2006-11-23 22:41:10 · answer #9 · answered by sglmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i hate this. This same thing happened to us this last past summer with a little boy next door (he is 6) and my son was being all happy getting to go to mama's to go swimming well that little boy heard my son say that and he said "can i go"? Well i am the same as you "what if that kid drowns then it will be on my head and plus that of my sons mama cause it is her property" but you know that he went and told his mom then she askes can he go, it is okay with me and i am like heck no.
We explained that our sons mama dosent allow other people (not family) to go swimming at her huse and well wouldn't you know both the mom and kid got mad but oh well that goes to show the mother is not a good mom to let her kid go with anyone to anywheres.
Some people just can't take a clue
2006-11-23 22:31:15 · answer #10 · answered by ஐ♥Julian'sMommy♥ஐ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's so not rude! They're just inviting your kid over to have some fun for kids....nothing wrong with that. If this parent asked your kid out is a close friend of yours...you should be able to trust him to keep trac of your kids :D
2006-11-23 22:40:51 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋