Hear me out ,to christians I promise me and my minions will all withdraw to Hell to party eternally while you all stay here making origami cranes and hugging each other,or whatever it is you do,plus a get-out-of-hell -free card.For muslims I promise you each your own personal Jinn and three wishes,(no wishing for more wishes)Atheists can do whatever they want as they do not believe in me anyway,traditional satanists get my respect and their own personal winged ape-demon,modern satanists get a condo in Pandemonium, Buddhists can kill one of their enemies without having to come back as a cockroach,and last but not least hindus get a free pass to sizzler's.Can I count on your vote?
2006-11-23 13:21:11 · 10 answers · asked by Broken_upon_wheels 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I'm the democratic candidate for Infernal President.
2006-11-23 13:25:50 · update #1
Agnostics you will receive a big-screen plasma t.v. and a coupon to block-busters.
2006-11-23 13:27:04 · update #2
Grand wazzoo,was it something I said?
2006-11-23 13:29:46 · update #3
Mrs.Stepford,I am running against the incumbent,Satan,Who is a Conservative,meaning he reflects the traditional values of Hell and favors the "trickle-down" system,i.e.he pisses on god,it trickles down and by the time it falls to earth it is ice by the time it reaches hell it has been purified by being run through an underground stream(hundreds of years later),then and only then can people in hell have ice water.I ,myself, am up,for installing a drinking fountain and maybe opening up a chain of Starbucks.
2006-11-23 16:01:54 · update #4
The Underworld is a democracy?!!! THAT certainly makes life a lot easier. As for your proposals, they sound pretty fair and reasonable all around. Against Satan, you definitely win.
2006-11-23 14:08:57 · answer #1 · answered by Caritas 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you wouldn't be such a party pooper if you were given more hugs.
Come here, big fella.
2006-11-23 13:23:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, someone else already has the position.
2006-11-23 13:26:00 · answer #3 · answered by Oshalla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got my vote--is anybody else running?
2006-11-23 15:21:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
who are you to offer these things
2006-11-23 13:24:29 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'M SURE YOU AND YOUR MAN-GINA WILL BE HAPPY THERE, CAUSE
YOU'RE DEMON @SS-FUKKINGS!
DID YOU KNOW THEY HAVE HORNS ON THEIR D1CKS?
2006-11-23 13:27:27 · answer #6 · answered by Medicine Eddie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
your weird
2006-11-23 13:27:09 · answer #7 · answered by britt1234:) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What about us agnostics????
2006-11-23 13:24:59 · answer #8 · answered by shermynewstart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GEE NO VIRGINS? NO VINO?
2006-11-23 13:30:18 · answer #9 · answered by cork 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No thanks.
2006-11-23 13:25:16 · answer #10 · answered by <><><> 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋