My best friend had 2 children with her first husband and he died when her youngest was 3. She remarried and had a third child about 8 years later. I had told her that I would give her a shower, but her sister wanted to be the one to give her a shower, so I stepped back and let her do the planning and I gave her a bunch of gifts instead. Well now, less than a year later, she is pregnant with her fourth child. I don't really think it is necessary to give her a shower, because I know that she has all or at least most of the nessecities from her last baby, like a stroller, swing, bouncy seat, etc. I do plan on getting her a gift, like I have before, but I don't know if I should give her a shower. I have read in some parenting magazines that after the first or second baby, it is not customary to give a woman a shower, but I had planned on giving her one with the 3rd child, since it had been 8 years inbetween that one and her 2nd. Should I give her one for this baby?
2006-11-23 13:01:52 · 16 answers · asked by LittleMermaid 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
I think at least one person got confussed. It has not been 8 years since her last one. It was 8 years between her 2nd and her 3rd. This is her 4th and her 3rd is not even 1 yet.
2006-11-23 13:21:11 · update #1
A shower isn't just or even necessarily about "showering" the mom with material goods, it's about showering her with love and support and celebrating the upcoming birth of her child by those who love her. She may not need a bunch of stuff, but I'm sure she'd appreciate having her friends and family gather in her honor. I didn't have a shower for my fourth, but I did have a special day where my best friends pampered me and we talked about birth, it was lovely and uplifting. It's a great thing to do for a mother especially when she's in the final weeks of pregnancy, which tend to be physically and emotionally trying.
2006-11-23 15:39:22 · answer #1 · answered by blueviolet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With it being a 4th child and she has the necessaties I would have a 'Baby Sprinkle'. The concept is similar but not as formal and not as much is given as the name alone implies you would sprinkle rather than shower her with gifts. I would also give her one as it is nice to get together in life with the ones you love. Having said that, I have 4 kids and have never had a baby shower or baby sprinkle. It would have been nice so ultimately you should decide what to do.
2006-11-23 21:07:03 · answer #2 · answered by friendly face 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know that four children is not easy.
However, the purpsose for a shower it to make sure that the mommy has all the essentials. If it's been less than a year there is no need. She has her layette and all the baby gear. What more does she need?
My aunt threw her daughter a shower for #2 a year after the first. I thought that was nuts. What did she need that for? And, it makes them less and less meaningful.
Don't do it.
2006-11-23 21:35:03 · answer #3 · answered by Baby #3 due 10/13/09 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would give her a "one-time-use only" shower with people bringing diapers, wipes, formula (if not breastfeeding, bra pads if she is), infant cereal, baby food, detergent, baby bath and shampoo, etc. You could even have it as a small get together at her favorite restaurant! This way, she feels that this pregnancy has been publicly acknowledged, but she doesn't receive a ton of gifts she'll have to exchange.
2006-11-23 21:52:06 · answer #4 · answered by Jill H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, Im having my fourth baby and my best friend is throwing me a shower. Ive had a shower with all of them, but this is my first girl. Its all for fun and socializing and its always nice for the new baby to have some new things. So go for it. Every baby deserves a celebration
2006-11-23 22:22:43 · answer #5 · answered by Blondi 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she already has most of what she will need, then that is not really necessary. I'm sure a lot of people will still get her gifts. If you really want to throw a shower, just have a small one. See if you can get people to come that couldn't make the other one. It wouldn't hurt.
2006-11-23 21:06:38 · answer #6 · answered by r_finewood 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it's kind of tacky to have a shower after the first unless the child is of a different father or it's been awhile since the last baby. I guess in this situation it would be okay though since it has been 8 years since the last one. I'd say go for it :-)
2006-11-23 21:04:32 · answer #7 · answered by CelebrateMeHome 6 · 2⤊ 3⤋
I think a woman deserves a baby shower if it's her 12th child! Plus, the new baby deserves new things! I say go for it!
2006-11-23 21:04:18 · answer #8 · answered by ladyw900ldriver 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
yes and she can always use diapers,wipes,bibs,ect. just because she already has the big stuff doesn't mean their is nothing else to give the baby, they always need something
2006-11-23 21:13:00 · answer #9 · answered by parrotsarenoisy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think she needs a shower. But you should still get her a small give to say congratulations.
2006-11-23 21:04:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋