i went to a soccer game one night, with people not from my school. this girl came up to me and said, "my brother thinks you're hot, and wanted me to give you his myspace. he's too much of a chicken to tell you himself." and she gave me a piece of paper with a link and walked away. i didn't even know who he was. i went back home and added him, and he's REALLY REALLY REALLY attractive. he talked to me a little at first, and commented my pictures about how "gorgeous" i am and stuff. i get that a lot, not to be vain or anything. he asked for my screen name. i am only 14 years old, and a freshman. he is a 17 year old junior. BUT i told him i'm a 15 year old sophomore because i was afraid he'd think freshman are lame. he's kind of a little bit of a pervert, but all guys guys his age are so i'm not worried. he wants to hang out at the mall this weekend, and he just asked me on aim "do you kiss on the first date??"
if i do go to the mall, i'm not sure what he's going to expect. help me out?
2006-11-23 10:58:39 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First of all you should'nt even be thinking about sex at such a young age. It will probably just ruin your future. Plus lying to people while on the internet is not a very smart thing to do. Your right most men are perverted, but if he really likes you then he wouldn't care if you kiss on the first date or not.
Your still a little to young to actually comprehend relationships. kids these days think just because they have had a boyfriend or a girlfriend ten they understand it. But they don't. You've never even met the guy. So you never know he could be that type of man who is just interested in you for sex.
If he really likes you like he says then he would take it slow. Besides sex is not a game it is a form of affection between two people who love each other and are married.
2006-11-23 11:06:11 · answer #1 · answered by Adrian R 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dating older guys at your age is always slippery, because intentions are never clear. But you started this all wrong by not being honest about your age and grade. You need to clear that up. If this is going to be serious, starting out with lies is never a good idea.
As for what he wants, flat out ask him. I'm a firm believe in being upfront. A lot of times, just asking something straight out will get the answer and the truth a lot faster. However, guys aren't always honest. So my advice is to play your hand close to your chest. Don't do anything you're not comfortable with. If your gut tells you something is wrong, listen.
You don't know this guy yet. He wouldn't even approach you himself, even at 17 years old? That seems odd and since he wants to know if you kiss on a first date, apparently, he isn't that shy. I'd be wary of this one. DO NOT be alone with him somewhere secluded. If he invites you back to his house or somewhere that it would only be the 2 of you, I advise against. It's best not to be in an uncomfortable situation that could've been avoided.
Follow your first mind here. If it seems like sex is all there is, then that's all there is. Brace yourself for his reaction, whatever it may be. But I'll tell you this, if he's really digging you, he'll wait. And he'll wait without griping about it either. Try having a conversation that doesn't involve sex or kissing or anything else. And ask yourself, what do you two mainly talk about when you talk? That should give you an idea of where his head is.
2006-11-23 11:08:56 · answer #2 · answered by Infamous B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are only 14 and should be very careful of people who give out "myspace" at soccer games, tell him meeting at the mall is not a first date you have to get to now him better do not go anywhere alone with him no matter how attractive he is, find out more about him first before meeting him.
2006-11-23 11:07:22 · answer #3 · answered by lara 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all hun, I'm sure you are very pretty. However, you are 14 and he is 17. Just BE careful! Yah, go and have fun, but I suggest not being alone with him and stay in a public place at all times. I suggest y'all meet at the mall and don't get alone with him in his car. I am a 19 year old female and I understand that most guys are pervs, but sometimes they will try to take advantage of you, especially if you are young and impressionable. He may actually like you, but make sure he likes you for YOU and not just how "hot" you are. Don't let him trick you into anything that you are not ready for. Guys can be all smooth and suave with their words to get girls to do stuff and then after they get what they want, they run. Just be careful and have fun and God bless you! :)
2006-11-23 11:04:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably he's really a 21 year old college freshman, who lied about his age so he could get in your pants easier.
At your age, it's a really good idea to be totally honest about your age, and not to take anonymous myspace papers from strangers.
I'd stay away from the mall for a few weeks if I were you.
2006-11-23 11:07:17 · answer #5 · answered by ye_river_xiv 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DO NOT under any circumstances go to the mall ALONE. You are only 14, you may think you can handle any situation that may come up but believe me you can't, and with a 17 year old you are asking for trouble. No matter how corny you think this is "SAVE YOURSELF FOR MARRIAGE" NO SEX!!!!!!!!!!! You will be so glad you waited.You really will.
2006-11-23 11:07:51 · answer #6 · answered by Penny Mae 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if he thinks he's going to get with you on the first hook up and you don't want to, it's simple.....just don't do anything that your uncomfortable with. If he ignores because you say no, then yes chances are that's all he wanted you for. But it wasn't a very smart idea to lie to him in the first place. He might indeed expect something more from an older person then he would a freshie.
2006-11-23 11:02:29 · answer #7 · answered by Bri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well dont go out with him! He is just going to use you. He might even make a fool out of you. I know who guys that age think. It is better to be safe than sorry. He may sound great now but he could turn around and become a snake. Watch out!
Do what is best for you though. Think before you act.
2006-11-23 11:04:11 · answer #8 · answered by rusteeford 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do what u feel..it is ur life but since he was so chicken to come and to talk to u then i think he is not the type to ask for sex from a 15 years old and about the question..he wanted to know ur style to know how to deal with u,that's all and i did the same thing before so give it a shot
2006-11-23 11:05:31 · answer #9 · answered by castello 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you kidding? what the heck are you even thinking at age 14?
of course he is only thinking of himself
and you are worth more than that
DON"t fall into that trap. Your body and your mind are far more valuable than to be thinking about sex or even having a boyfriend at this age.
If you were my daughter (or friend) I would keep you away from any interaction or situation for awhile - for your own good.
you need to do some growing up girl.
2006-11-23 11:02:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋