my uncle has colin cancer and it has spread to the liver and is invading his body. he has taken chemo and has recently stopped. he is really special to me and if he dies (which i know he will) i will be torn apart. can some PLEASE tell me how to cope with this situation??????? thanks guys.
2006-11-23 10:43:33 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
Sorry to hear about your uncle. I've been an oncology nurse for 9+ years and my best advice is just love your uncle like you always have and don't be afraid to discuss death and dying issues with him. Don't be afraid to say the word "cancer." Find out what he wants, if he has a living will in place, does he want to be resuscitated if he stops breathing, etc...Letting him decide how he wants things to be now-while he's able-will help give him a much needed sense of control in an otherwise helpless feeling situation. The trick to taking care of or being with most sick people, is remembering that they don't want to be treated like they are "sick" people. He's still the same man on the inside that he was before the cancer started doing it's own thing to his body. He's more than his cancer. His life is more than this disease. It can be a real relief for terminal patients when people are just simply honest and say, " I just hate the thought of you not being with me," Or, "I'm so afraid when I think about you dying." Or, "Are you afraid of dying?" Give him permission to talk about the "elephant in the room," if you know what I mean. Good luck to you. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.
2006-11-24 05:28:08 · answer #1 · answered by Divacancerrn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My father died of liver cancer in June, so I feel your pain and your fear. I want you to be honest with you and say first of all, liver cancer is a very fast and fatal cancer. It is rarely able to be fought off. You can cope by being prepared for what to expect in his condition. There is a lot of information on liver cancer on the internet.There is most likely going to be a fast progression and a lot of it will be heart-breaking to witness. My advice is just to spend the time you have left together. Make him feel comfortable and just do what he wants. Offer to give massage, make his favorite meal, whatever it is...just provide him with love, comfort and acceptance. I wouldn't ask too many questions or force any issues, I would just be there. Offer to help with anything and everything. Housecleaning, grocery shopping, doctors appointments, legal stuff that may need to be taken care of. It may help to ask what is wishes are for when he passes.
I am so sorry to have to say things like that but as hard as it is to say and to hear, I was grateful for the doctors and others that were so honest about the condition of liver cancer. Because someone told me how serious it was, I was able to just spend my fathers last two months here just being there for him in whatever way possible so he wouldn't feel alone.
There will be a time when he will lose full independence and when that time comes it is extremely hard for everyone involved. Please, be strong, get support. If you have any questions or want advice, you can email me.
No one can tell you how to fully cope with this situation. It is a very rough spot to me in and it is a horrible lost feeling. All you can do is live through it one moment at a time.
Bless you and your family.
2006-11-23 11:05:23 · answer #2 · answered by NINA_NICHOLE 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My heart is going out to you!!!!!!!!!!! 2005 my Christmas vacation became spent contained in the medical institution for breast maximum cancers surgical operation, and then chemotherpay the 2006 2007 Christmas. This 2008 Christmas i'm so feeling like a sparkling human being again! I walk my Pug and Yorkie up the little trails on the state park nerby, and luxuriate in gazing The Crabb family contributors stay 2008 DVD countless circumstances an afternoon in view that i purchased it very last month. I watch The Church Channel on television, and luxuriate in each and every of the classes about something about Jesus... so.. i receives a prayer fabric out for you and your Uncle and your spouse and youngsters at the moment, placed it in my Bible...it really is yours from our God on your spouse and youngsters decrease back to our God who is going which could assist you....in case you adult men favor to digital mail me , be at liberty to finish that...
2016-11-29 10:03:19 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure you go visit him. My husband passed away from cancer and what hurt him the most was that some of his family and friends that he was close to quit coming to see him. Their excuse was that they couldn't stand to see him like that. He felt abandon by them. So go be with him as much as you can and do anything you can for him. He will need help, so be there. Let him know how much you love him. After he is gone you will keep him in your heart. You never quit missing them but some of the pain of losing them goes. And remember....Always pray. God is there to hear you.
2006-11-23 10:59:30 · answer #4 · answered by Beth 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had my mother die of cancer 5yrs ago. It was the hardest thing to deal with. family plays a very important part in dealing with a loss like this. Spend whatever time you can and let him know how much you love hima nd how much he means to you. Tell him everything you want him to know. You won't get a chance after he's gone. Good luck
2006-11-23 10:48:52 · answer #5 · answered by insd92104 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try an alternative treatment. Order "Phytoflora Brazilian Green Bee Propolis Capsules - 400 mg/active. It is made from the Africanized honey bee to target viruses, and infections.
I don't know if it would work for your uncle. If he is not allergic to bees it may work for him. If he is allergic, he could only take small doses at a time.
Order at: http://store.uniflora.us
Wish you the best.
2006-11-23 12:33:52 · answer #6 · answered by marvin d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi so sorry to hear about your uncle.It is allways difficult to deal with the loss of a close loved one I lost my mom just about 2 years ago. this time of year is so hard but i just try to remember the best things about her and remember that she would be proud of me.It is my advice to you remember the great things about your uncle and you may want to tell him how much you care if you are able. you wont regret that later on.
2006-11-23 10:49:03 · answer #7 · answered by lilme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel terrible for your what type of cancer is it? Because i have uncle who resears the heartthat used to work coumbia prebtian in nyc because my ggrandma had cancer like 5 years ago and got rid of it i hope your uncles get rid of it to like myy grandma did because i loost somone in my family who had cancer it wanasn't my grandma it was my grandpa sisters
2006-11-24 02:05:36 · answer #8 · answered by eric h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spend as much time as you can with him as he can tolerate as he is ill. Make the most of the time you have left. There will be no regrets for you if you don't say, I wish I did. But remember, he is ill and only as tolerated. Sorry..... Make sure he knows how you feel.
2006-11-23 10:47:57 · answer #9 · answered by flower 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spend as much quality time with your uncle as possible. Make him comfortable and happy . Time is all important at this point.
2006-11-23 12:48:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋