I'm a 23 year old male virgin at Stanford. I told my friends that I never had a girlfriend, kissed a girl, danced with a girl or ever had sex. One of my friends said, "Don't worry. You're not missing out on much. That means you've never broken up with anybody and ever had your heart broken, so your really not missing out on much."
Is this true? I'm not planning on having a girlfriend or having sex in the future or anytime soon. Am I really missing out on much?
I only guess I'm really not missing out on much - thats why I'm asking.
2006-11-23 09:49:16 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
im not planning om marrying either and im an agnostic, not some religious right wing christian
2006-11-23 09:53:43 · update #1
honestly, i wish i had been in your position. i wish that my husband had been my first. it is a virtue, you may feel a little left out and you may feel like you are missing something. and sex is wonderful, when it's with the right person. i wish my first time had been with the right person. i always look back and think what if i had waited. you've waited this long. why not wait a little longer. good luck!
2006-11-23 09:54:06 · answer #1 · answered by somebody's a mom!! 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It feels really, really really good but that's about it. It's more of a full body pleasure that totally takes your mind for a ride. If there already isn't any emotional attachment to the person involved, well it STILL feels good, but it's only skin deep...it's only on a base physical level. It's probably much better to wait until you meet somebody you really love so you can have all those great emotions at once, but that's up to you. (and 99.9% of people can't wait on their soulmates anyway, so why not have some fun? Just another option though)
It doesn't mean anything nor does it 'make you a man' ...it's just something that feels very good. Any meanings you give it (or don't give it) are choices that you make. But sex...is just sex.
Hope that helps. =) In short, you ARE missing out on something, but it's up to YOU to decide if it's 'much.' You have to throw out all socetial expectations, (both for sex and against sex) and decide on what you want.
What I don't get sometimes though is how anti-sex people say 'sex isn't that important, wait until you're married' but if it wasn't so important for relationships that had 'real love', why would it have to be included when you found said 'real love.' Think about it. Sex is simply one of our base biological needs....like water, and we should just be real and stop pretty-ing things up. Do we put so many moral implications on drinking a glass of water? *shrug*
2006-11-23 10:12:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well ... you can look at it 2 ways.
1- Yes, you've never had a girlfriend and have never had to go through all the drama and BS that often accompanies most relationships, BUT
2- You haven't had some of the experience with relationships that some guys your age already have been through.
So your first relationship might be a tad bit rocky because you've never been through one before.
But then again, there's a ton of girls out there who are in the same situation, so it makes for a nice first experience for the both of you.
Different things happen to different people at different times, that's all I can say. As long as you're not one of those people that feels empty and alone because they haven't had a relationship yet and you're happy with where you are, I wouldn't worry about it.
2006-11-23 09:56:11 · answer #3 · answered by Imperfect 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sex.. maybe because you are a guy..... the emotion and bonding you have with a significant other yes......... the heartbreaking and death-wishing! no youa re not missing out!!! my sister is a senior undergrad at stanford! there are a lot of people there!! So if you want the option is there sometimes its nice to try to see if you like it if not then don't. Personally I like guys who don't sleep around anyways! good look! im applying to stanford! email me if you want! amonkeypouredcoffeeinmyboots@gmail.com
2006-11-23 09:54:45 · answer #4 · answered by LIZ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes but its ok
Im not gonna lie to you. Sex with a chick you like is great.
But im also against promiscuous behaviour so its kind of hypocritical.
I guess sex with that kind of chick is fine but don't marry her because if she does it with you after 1, 2 or 3 dates she will or is doing it with other "nice", "cute" guys.
So i guess I would wait if you can, but also date around.
And dont get married until you are at least 30
2006-11-23 09:54:08 · answer #5 · answered by Its me 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just believe in yourself(cliche I know). I'n not too far from your age and I dont care if Im a virgin till im married. Wait a sec Never mind but you get the point
2006-11-23 09:56:41 · answer #6 · answered by Thegreatgk 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Lol it doesn't sound like you have the charisma to get girls your own age let alone ones younger. But if you do , then yes go for the target practise. best of luck
2016-03-29 06:59:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are quite a bit of complexities in relationships, that is true and if you can avoid your carnal lusts and desires all the better for you...
But you are missing the most important part of being a human being---Love...
2006-11-23 09:56:18 · answer #8 · answered by Thomas 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No the only thing u miss is the holding,touching, and the feeling of someone else.The rest u can do yourself.
2006-11-23 09:57:15 · answer #9 · answered by gxsilver1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in freaking stanford and you are virgin??!!! Listen you geeky bastard, life is meant to be experienced not through books but rather through living it. Go out into the world and live your life to the fullest, and while you are at it use your IQ and find yourself a girl, YOU ARE MISSING OUT....BIG TIME. Good luck and may the force be with you....ALWAYS.
2006-11-23 09:56:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋