Who is more selfish when dealing with suicide?

Question

I read a lot that someone says that their loved one committed suicide and was just being selfish by doing so. Is it more selfish of a person to take their life and end a misery that nothing else seems to fix or is it more selfish to say that that person was selfish in taking his/her life and he should've "stuck it out"?

Answer 1

I don't think a person is selfish for committing suicide. How can a mentally ill person be selfish? They are not able to be selfish because in their world nothing is real. It may appear to be a selfish act, and/or it might be that those of us left behind, have to label the person as selfish as it is our only way of coping with the grief. People who turn to suicide either didn't have the help and support they needed or their mind just couldn't cope any more. Not a lot different to a person who dies of a heart attack. You can quit smoking, lose weight to prolong your life but what do you do when your own mind has turned its back on you. To turn to suicide means you think there is no other way out. It's a sad fact of life. You can only feel sorry for these people.

Answer 2

Yep, good question. When a person does it in a way that their family and maybe kids will find them, this is not good. But the person just wants to escape their misery. Some disappear but this is cruel too as the people left behind never know what has happened. If we can think clearly, which again is not always possible for the person in misery, seek as much help as possible first, talk, try drugs for depression even. It may pass and Life may be great again. But there is no easy answer.Even worse are the ones who take their kids with them, to "save" them from our sad and worrying existence. That IS selfish, and the partner left behind must be in torment.Wish the answer was there, but we could go round in circles forever.....

Answer 3

just continuing to exist is not surviving, each moment is an astronomical magnitude of despair, agony and grief, a vacuum like black hole, there are good people that are suffering even tho they worked extremely hard to make a life, for some there is no karma, or law of balance, no degree of fairness what so ever, god does give some people more than they can bear, and also the fear that if they try to end the horrific torture they will then be punished for all eternity, for not being able to endure the lousy hand they were dealt, when is enough finally enough, how many times do you have to wake up and think “oh god not another day I have to get through” suicide is not a permanent solution to a temporary problem, it is freedom from the endless negativity that gets worse with every breath, what kind of a sadistic maniac would deliberately cause these poor victims additional pain, with a dose of guilt for good measure, why is it humane to put animals out of their misery but encouraged to force humans unrelenting and undeserved scourge

Answer 4

I have often wondered something similar to this, as I have previously dealt with suicidal thoughts and an attempt or two. I think that it is ridiculous for someone to think that another person who has taken their life was being selfish. I feel that the person making the accusation often times has never been so miserable that he/she has contemplated suicide. I don't think that the person who committs suicide is being selfish because it's all they know. It's currently the only answer they know to their problems.

Answer 5

This is a very good question.

I don't pretend to have any answers, as I'm currently so miserable the thought of suicide has entered my own mind. When you're in the middle of losing everything that's important to you, it becomes difficult to justify reasons to "stick it out" - WHY should one stick it out, when the very ones you love don't want to be around you anymore?

Ultimately, for Christians the answer has to be that suicide is self-murder and displeases the Lord we seek to please and honor. But I don't pretend that this answer takes away the pain, or makes the loss and grief any less awful. It simply provides a baseline by which to work from - "Am I going to live to please Christ, or to please myself?"

I realize this may not help you at all, I'm struggling myself. Best to you.

Answer 6

I think its more selfish (incredibly so) to suggest that someone should endure a life they hate just to save someone else from having to go to a funeral and deal with their loss.

Answer 7

it is selfish to put others through misery.

if your actions only affected you...then it wouldn't be selfish.

When you to make a decision to commit suicide, you are making a decision that:
a. causes pain and suffering to others, and
b. you don't have to be around dealing with those who are hurting.

i'd say that ranks it as a pretty selfish act.

Answer 8

It's selfish to make someone else's death (suicide or no) about you.

Answer 9

it is ridiculous to say some-one is being selfish by committing suicide.....depression/suicide is a mental ILLNESS......it's like saying some-one who died of cancer was selfish for dying......it's ridiculous, nobody chooses to have depression or suicidal urges, it is a disease!!

Answer 10

Suicide is simply a high level of aggression, taken out on oneself. Lots of cops do that.
Once you are gone, what stupid things people say about you will not affect you, so is meaningless... ;-)