My mother was aware that all of her children and their dates would be attending her home for thanksgiving dinner.She accepted an invitation to someone else's home for the holiday without letting any of her guests know about it.I found out a day in advance and was able to make other plans.Othersmay show up there today and find her absent....................Was this bad manners?
2006-11-23 08:47:08 · 27 answers · asked by Direktor 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Absolutely!
2006-11-23 08:49:15 · answer #1 · answered by CrankyYankee 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Ouch! That's a real gaffe. You don't say how old your mom is, or if she has problems. This is the sort of thing that happens with Alzheimer patients, or peoplel who have had strokes and have lost their short term memories.
Sorry that your thanksgiving was spoiled -- actually I would have been tempted to go anyway, just to spend the holiday with siblings and other family members, and to get to know some of the dates. You might have had to cook your own dinner, but that wouldn't be any big deal. Most of the stuff can be ordered in or bought at Safeway deli in any case. But it sounds like what is happening here is something far more than bad manners. Were any of the 'dates' going to be sleeping over? How does she feel about that? It's the sort of thing that can really bother an older person. It's really hard to say what's going on in her mind, but I'd truly urge you to get some professional advice here about what might be causing the problem.
2006-11-23 09:59:11 · answer #2 · answered by old lady 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hate people who cover at the back of manners to manage circumstances. Passive aggressive manners are as undesirable as spitting at human beings. i don't concepts swearing, if it particularly is in the dazzling context. Manners are extremely approximately exhibiting due attention and admire. i think of the fashion of issues that wind me up, are issues like the guy that is going fishing on an analogous place as me and he has a mouth like a foghorn. He on no account shuts up and spoils the peace that I appreciate. If in basic terms he could desire to discover ways to chat with much less quantity.
2016-12-29 09:29:25 · answer #3 · answered by santolucito 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! She should have informed the guests at the very least- actually, she should not have taken this invitation when she had already asked people to come to her home instead. They would have had to turn down other invitations, so to cancel at the last moment would have put them in a problem.
2006-11-23 08:55:32 · answer #4 · answered by Jim 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Presuming she invited you to come, it was definitely bad manners. If you and your siblings ASSUMED it was ok for you to come without asking her, then you are the ones who are not being polite. Parents almost always love their kids VERY much, but sometimes we get tired of being taken for granted. Maybe next Thanksgiving you should 1) ask if it's ok to gather at her house and 2) offer to help put the meal together.
2006-11-23 09:00:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that is terrible. That is a complete lack of manners. If she invited all of you and did not cancel until the day before. Or did all of you invite yourselves and assume she was doing all of the cooking? God bless****
2006-11-23 11:23:10 · answer #6 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah its rude, but, how many of you and your "dates" were pitching in and helping clean the house, purchase the food, prepare the meal and clean up after wards? Maybe you all take her for granted? And who cares about manners? Maybe "Mom" was stating something you all are missing. You all need to talk to her and find out.....maybe something else is in the air so to speak.
2006-11-23 09:50:11 · answer #7 · answered by ladygwen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely. We had a similar situation. I bought a plane ticket only to find out that the family would be somewhere else. I can use the ticket at a later date, but it would have been nice to have been informed ahead of time. I didn't go.
2006-11-23 09:34:46 · answer #8 · answered by shermynewstart 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, it was very bad manenrs. If it was already planned for all of you to go there, than she should have honored that. It isnt fair to those who planned to go. Hopefully, everyone was able to find other things to do for Thanksgiving......
2006-11-23 08:56:26 · answer #9 · answered by parrothead2371 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did she accept the other invitation because her kids just assumed she was cooking or did she actually invite everyone to her house? I mean she was aware but YOU didn't say if she invited them?
2006-11-23 08:57:33 · answer #10 · answered by pinkrosegreeneyes bluerose 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Bad manners is the least of it. How about selfish, inconsiderate,
narcissistic, selfish, inconsiderate, thoughtless, mean. You should invite her to dinner and not be there when she arrives.
2006-11-23 14:03:45 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋