My ex boyfriend's parents and I are very close. We still get together for holidays and what not. They are also the grandparents of my 8 year old daughter. I just found out that my ex's dad has cancer in his gull bladder. He is going into surgery on Dec 11 to have his gull bladder removed. They are not sure whether the cancer has or will spread to the rest of his body. What can I do to bring them some comfort and show support in this time? Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. :( Thank you
2006-11-23 08:13:56 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
I have first hand experience in dealing with cancer. What would be very helpful? Offer to clean the house, offer to make dinner. Help the wife so she can focus on her husband. Also, visit him. For my mom, I put together a "hospital kit". I included a washcloth, bar of soap, shampoo, magazines, new pjs' etc... whatever they like. And once grand-dad is able to, bring your daughter often so he can see her. That will really cheer him up!
2006-11-23 08:21:33 · answer #1 · answered by *me* 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The worst thing you can do is probably the thing you want to do most - comfort them. There really is no comfort, it's a scary time. All you can do is be there to listen, to tell them that you're there for them, maybe do some research on the internet to learn more about gall bladder cancer (try www.mayoclinic.com). Don't offer false hope ie: it'll get better, don't worry. Just try to let them talk and discuss their feelings. I'm so sorry that he has to go through this - I wish him a speedy recovery. Best wishes.
2006-11-23 16:19:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how he is reacting to the cancer and the gallbladder operation. If he seeks answers, then ask things in general and listen and sympathize (not empathize unless you have been thru the same thing). No sugar coating. Be matter of fact.
Now if he is in a somewhat denial state, just be with him and hold his hand (and his wife's). Listen with understanding and not judgment.
I am a cancer survivor and my sister, whom I talk long-distance with, is going thru a second round of chemo.
Blessings...
2006-11-23 16:27:39 · answer #3 · answered by volleyball_luv_it 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cancer support groups are great places for x-cancer or even those recovering from cancer to meet, share and learn. No one feels alone when there are others who share the same condition.
2006-11-24 08:06:10 · answer #4 · answered by thru a glass darkly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, if it is cancer, why are they waiting so long to remove it. If it is, he doesn't want sympathy, nor empathy, just treat him and the family as normal as you can. People have fellings , respect them always like you want yours respected.
2006-11-23 16:37:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i been going thou this for 3 years now who just show them that you really care and give them all the help that you can be there when he just wont,s to talk let him no that god is with him most of the time befor thay do surgery thay make you go thou kemo.god be with you just ask him to show you the help that he needs
2006-11-23 16:32:21 · answer #6 · answered by connie c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be there if they need you, you could tell them if they need you call anytime or day,, meaybe cook dinner for them at times lol
2006-11-23 19:38:53 · answer #7 · answered by Cami lives 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be normal, be yourself, and don't shy/be scared away.
2006-11-23 18:53:08 · answer #8 · answered by catzrme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LORD JESUS CHRIST,
WALK THROUGH OUR HOUSE
AND TAKE AWAY ALL OUR
WORRIES AND ILLNESSES
IN JESUS NAME. AMEN
2006-11-23 16:21:44 · answer #9 · answered by TheSkysTheLimit 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋