They've known each other forever...They both like each other...They know it's illegal but they really like each other..&& she wants my advice but iono what to tell her...So will ya help me please lol...
2006-11-23 07:45:10 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Appears to this old guy that there would only be one reason that a 23 year old would want to see a 14 year, and I'll tell you it isn't to help with her homework. Kids that age are so impressionable and believe that have met the male that they will spend the rest of their lives together and they are in love. But for a 23 year old to take out a minor this age he has a lot of issues or would be seeing someone closer to his age. I have 3 sons and if any one of them had ever wanted to date a girl that young I would have spoken with them about it. I'm almost positive that both of these individuals parents would not agree with this situation either.
2006-11-23 07:55:15 · answer #1 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well... let's clarify. It's not illegal to be friends, or to like each other, at that age difference. I'm guessing you are referring to more than a friendly relationship, though, and that's where things can turn to trouble.
(I'm also assuming that he is the older one here.)
Even if he's trying to have good intentions and she is genuinely in crush (or something possibly more serious) with him, the thing is that being that much older than her at those ages the relationship is going to be pretty unequal, even if he isn't trying to make it so. Not to mention, of course, that if things become physical he could get into some serious hot water legally plus she could get hurt emotionally pretty badly if things don't work out. (I don't mean to be cynical, but, honestly, how many relationships have you seen a 14 year old in that wind up seriously lasting?)
If they are really good friends, let them *be* friends. He can be sort of an "uncle"/"big brother"/adviser/mentor sort of figure and there can be affection in that sort of way, but it's probably best things stay that way for now.
If he *isn't* just being some kind of perv into younger girls, he should be cool with that. And if there really is something "meant to be" between them, it will work out that much better and easier when she's a bit older and the age difference is less of a deal (and when things can happen not-illegally between them).
And if it wouldn't have worked out anyway, it is a lot better that she is a little disappointed now by a failed crush than to have to deal with eventually being rejected by a significantly older guy, plus feeling confused/cheapened about any emotional/physical involvement they had, plus the potential legal problems (if the relationship starts to go south, it could get ugly to the tune of "if you leave me people will find out what kinds of illegal things you have been doing to me").
2006-11-23 16:03:37 · answer #2 · answered by M W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If her parents don't know, tell them. A 14 year old in no way shape or form has the experience that at 23 year old has and can be maneuvered into things that she is not prepared for emotionally or physically. Do her a favor and tell her that you do not approve and that your opinion is that she should not be dating someone that is almost a decade older than her.
2006-11-23 15:49:48 · answer #3 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
23 year old...I would not put it as harsh as the other did. I want to point out one simple truth: people that have relationships have more then sex, they have respect and talks. Tell me how long do you think a 14 year old and a 23 year old will talk? What will be their common subjects of interest? Dolls?
2006-11-23 15:52:15 · answer #4 · answered by Andrei B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A 23 yr old is too old to be dating a 14 yr old. It can lead to trouble for him and her. If her parents do not want them to see each other they can really make life hard for him as she is a minor.
2006-11-23 15:50:51 · answer #5 · answered by mnwomen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the 23 year old sicko's pedophile *** needs to be thrown in jail!!
AND no, they cannot be best friends no matter what he tells her..they are too far apart in age and maturity. Although this 23 year old is obviously not mature and has some mental issues.
2006-11-23 15:47:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, for one, they may like each other, but that doesn't change the fact that they will have problems down the road. For example, the man can move somewhere and fall for someone else, or worst, break her heart and the parents finds out. In my opionion, it's a bad idea.
2006-11-23 15:54:09 · answer #7 · answered by Tsumi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ummm hello, houston we have a problem... first ya dont date a 14 yr old if ur 23. and if ur 23 u sure dont date a 14 yr old.. whats wrong with people... get a flipping clue!!!! and if shes ur friend and not really you in this situation then tell her to back way off
2006-11-23 15:52:39 · answer #8 · answered by boots 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
their romantic relationship is illegal and he could go to jail. the 14 year old is a minor and still considered a child.
it is unnatural for a 23year old to be interested in a romance with a 14 year old and not funny either. this is not healthy
2006-11-23 15:53:53 · answer #9 · answered by t d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A fourteen year old has'nt even "tasted life". Even if they stay together, there would be anymosity on the part of the fourteen year old for being "robbed of her youth". In an adult couple nine years age difference isn't unreasonable.
2006-11-23 15:57:35 · answer #10 · answered by sluggo1947 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋