I got Archie from a rescue home and he does seem to have a problem with men. He has been very settled at my home but since my boyfriend moved in he will no longer stay indoors if I am at work but my boyfriend is indoors. This means that he will be outside in the wet and cold for up to 12 hours a day and then he sulks and will still refuse to come in when I do get home. It's very upsetting as I obviously love both of them. My boyfriend has tried to get Archie to like him but he's having none of it.
2006-11-19 23:24:36 · 17 answers · asked by sophie b 1 in Pets ➔ Cats
He has obviously had some bad experiences with men. Your boyfriend should realise that its not his fault. He shouldn't try to win Archies' affection by being nice to him - but by ignoring him. Archie thinks he is a threat and nothing your boyfirend does will change his mind on this one. Cats are very set in their ways and you don't know what kinds of experiences have taught him this fear. Instead, your boyfriend should just go about his business and ignore the cat. After a few weeks, Archie will realise that there is nothing to worry about and start to reclaim his spot in the house. In the meantime, make sure that there is somewhere dry and cosy he can wait in outside - like a box with a blanket etc.
He'll come around in his own time.
2006-11-20 00:18:01 · answer #1 · answered by PetLover 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, why is boyfriend hanging around your apartment doing nothing while you work? This could be your cats way of protecting you from your bad judgment. "Lose this loser, Mom."
Let's assume he has a reason to be home. Have him feed the cat. Have him change litter. You must make the cat feel he is not losing his mistress, but gaining another slave.
Always take time to pet cat. Make sure that cat knows that boyfriend has not taken over Archie's place in your heart. The men come and the men go but a good cat can last for 20 years if you feed good quality food and provide regular vet care. Most marriages don't last that long.
2006-11-20 07:38:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like poor Archie is suffering some severe kind of psychological damage from maltreatment.
I think the catnip suggestion is good, but also slowly step back from feeding Archie yourself and hand over the feeding ritual to your boyfriend - over a period of say 1 week, that way Archie will get to learn that this man isn't so bad after all associating him with food, rather than whatever treatment he got from his last male owner.
Good luck.
2006-11-20 07:42:00 · answer #3 · answered by Phlodgeybodge 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I use to have that problem too. My suggestion is and yes, it will take time for your cat to trust him. Have your bf feed/water the cat: use canned cat food(its better for them anyway), chat with Archie like he is human whenever he make appearance and most of all patience.. My bf and Tigger get along great now. And what worse is he favors my bf over me, lol. Doesn't help my bf also spoil the heck out of him by sneaking him little treats during our meal times(yes i choose to ignore that)
Besides can't bite or ignore the hand that feeds ya.
2006-11-20 09:58:34 · answer #4 · answered by mia_unicornbaby 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let him give the cat treats (ham, chicken, lamb)
that way the cat will warm to him slowly. sounds like the reason he was in the rescue home was at the hands of a man so you have to be patient it will take time but he will warm to him eventually, he needs to show the cat he can be trusted and wont hurt him, maybe try and make him a little cat house outside to make it more comfortable for him (something to keep rain off him) at least that way untill he starts to have more faith he has somewhere he can go and hide and feel protected. .
good luck
2006-11-20 08:22:41 · answer #5 · answered by sweetness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might take time. Your boyfriend shouldn't try to rush it. If the cat ever likes him, let him do it in his own time. My oldest is now four years old. Whenever anybody came over, he'd run and hide. After a while, he'd start coming out to sniff at the person. Now, we can't keep him off of the laps of visitors. Your cat might have been abused by men in the past. Just give it time. It might happen eventually. If it never happens, please don't get rid of him (the cat I mean) just for that.
2006-11-20 07:31:46 · answer #6 · answered by Herman Munster 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does your b.f like cats? Cats can tell when people dont like them and they will respond. I guess it could just be a matter of time. Animals really dont like change. One of the best things to do is let him feed the cat. Then the cat should associate him with giving him food which is good. Its just a matter of time for Archie to adjust to your b.fs scent , look etc.
2006-11-20 07:29:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've got to get your cat inside and make sure he does not get out at all. If your boyfriend just goes about his business, the cat will come around. Have your boyfriend be the one that feeds him and be sure the cat sees he's the one filling the dish.
2006-11-20 07:38:09 · answer #8 · answered by Classy Granny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pets are excellent judges of character. Maybe Archie just dosen't trust him.
Either that or he's jealous. He was the apple of your eye but now you've got a new man in your life.
2006-11-20 07:56:40 · answer #9 · answered by specs appeal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your cat knows something you don't about the BF... :) They can sense these things, you know!
Other than that, have him be the primary caregiver for a couple of weeks.. cat doesn't eat unless BF gives him the food. He'll come around as long as your BF is consistantly kind.
2006-11-20 07:48:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋