every time i go visit for my vacation. she needs 24/7 care and i did do it last year for my vacation so she could spend time with my daughter that she rarely gets to see. this year they were upset with me cuz i couldn't make the trip to visit them so that i could give them all a break from taking care of her. they also want me to put my life on hold and take care of her full time for a pittance. they don't seem to realize that i have a family now (i'm a single parent of 2) and bills to pay. what they are offering to pay me is not enough!! i love my grandmother to death but i just can't do it. am i wrong for feeling this way?should they expect me to use my vacation time taking care of her?
2006-11-19 15:51:52 · 6 answers · asked by living_dead_sandra 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
well, 2 of my aunts pitch in to take care of her and now they are looking for provider to do most of it. i was going to do it but the problem is that me and my grandother don't really get along. I'm the black sheep ofthe family and if she were to kick me out, none of my other family members would take me and my kids in until i found another joband place to stay.
2006-11-19 16:09:01 · update #1
my family is afraid of putting her in a nursing home and frankly i am too. i used to be an aide in a nursing home and i have seen some horrible things.
2006-11-19 16:17:24 · update #2
I think you should go ahead and help your grandmother.I assure you that you would get back love and good wishes from her.
2006-11-19 16:01:05 · answer #1 · answered by manu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it! I got stuck taking care of my Mom. I shouldn't say stuck,but I don't get any help. My sister takes her 2 weeks out of the year and thinks it a BIG deal! I have to take her everywhere and do for her everyday. I can't find a job because I have to be there for Mom and my family doesn't even offer anything to me in the way of money. My husband just lost his job and money is tight. So I say, don't do it. The family thinks that because they give you pittance,they don't have to help you. If Grandmother is that bad they should get home help services in. They didn't help you when you needed it,did they????
2006-11-19 16:57:19 · answer #2 · answered by whataboutme 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
agree and if your grandmother were asked she would also. If she requires 24/7 care she should be in a home where that is provided , not relying on family and trying to guilt you into it, tell them you can, not and will not and that is your final answer, and so not under any circumstances feel bad. If you took a poll of all elderly and asked them if they wanted to make their family their prime care givers the answer would be a resounding no
2006-11-19 16:10:11 · answer #3 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are a single parent who needs to take care of your own children. Put her in a good nursing home and get people to visit to make sure evrything is being done properly.
2006-11-19 17:35:01 · answer #4 · answered by I am a Muppet 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you are wrong for your feelings. But you have to talk with them about it. Telll them the same things that you are telling us. Now of course they are going to get mad but they will also be forced to make other arrangements. You can't please the world. You have to do what is best for you and your children. They are priority. This doesn't mean that you don't love your grandmother and want what is best for her but are your other family members even thinking about your bills, life, and children? Do what is best for you.
2006-11-19 15:59:01 · answer #5 · answered by shellese2 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them to pitch in and help, how cruel and selfish of all of them...
2006-11-19 15:54:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋