insomnia after a death of a family member...help?

Question

I hope someone can help me with my question. I had a very close family member pass away 5 months ago after a very short illness and I think this may have some impact on my sleeping patterns. If I fall asleep before 4am I count myself lucky. I am lucky not to suffer from any stress at work or at home, so could it be this? and do I see my doctor....I am trying some home remedies, but they don't appear to be working

Answer 1

I'v never slept well but sometimes, when its really bad. I imagin the place I want to be. (a happy place) sounds silly I know but when everyone else is snoring away and I'm lying there in the dark thinking, this is what I do. Mine is a house over looking a gate. When I walk through the gate theres a sercret garden split into three parts. Each garden is unique and beautiful, In each is a door leading to where ever you want it to. my first door leads to an irland, its quite and pieceful where you can begin to calm, when you feel ready, you can go through the door you came and go into the second door, somewhere you've been that you accotiate with happier times. Mine is africa, paint it in what ever light you like, its your memory. When your ready leave and go into the third and final door, in this one is the ultimate place you would love to be, calm and beutiful. In this place are the people you've been lucky enough to meet, who have passed on. Mine is a hill side leading down to river and a bridge, I imagin my grandad sat fishing on the bridge and often go and sit beside him. Tell them everything you want to, I believe when you think of the dead, the dead can hear you. I know this is my happy place and everyone is different. But its helps me to calm and think of all the things i love. There are no bounderies here its your own heaven and its what you make it. If you can't find a way to calm and sleep, I would say go to your docter, the less sleep you have the more your body will suffer and Your family member wouldn't want that. Dealth is not a punishment, its a release and I think we all get to see each other again. Good luck, I wish you all the best.

Answer 2

I'm sure you're right about the reason behind your insomnia, I experienced the same after losing my mum. I'm afraid the only thing that improves the problem is time, I used to lie awake getting stressed but realised that was making the problem worse so I started getting up and doing things until I felt sleepy, nothing too stimulating though, I used to tidy up, do some ironing or even write my shopping list. The problem with taking medication is that you interfere with the natural sleep mechanism so you mgiht get off to sleep but once you stop taking the medication you have to go through the whole process again. Everyone is different but I promise, in time, the problem does resolve itself.

Answer 3

Yes it is most definatly that. I just lost two family members in the span of four months and your right if I fall asleep before 4 am I am lucky. I would go see a doctor if you think that this is something that will be lasting a while. It is going to take a toll on your everyday life, believe me. I had to go see the doctor, sleepless nights were causing me very bad headaches, and my energy levels were at a very low. So I know take a sleeping aide. It helps tremendously, so if you feel you need it go ahead and see someone about some help.

Answer 4

I would say you probably just need to give yourself more time. You are still in a grieving period, so don't be so hard on yourself.

One of the things I read about insomnia is that you need to get up out of bed if you are having trouble getting to sleep. Go out of your room, maybe read for a little while. Or have a warm drink. Or sit and write in a daily journal. Busy yourself with little tasks until you feel drowsy. Then return to bed.

Another tip I've read is not to watch tv or read in bed. Only use your bed for sleeping. That way you are relating the bed to only one thing: sleep. Not any other chore/task.

Answer 5

I also think you are not sleeping because you miss your family member. About there not being stress in your life...I doubt that..Losing a family member is stress. Not sleeping is stress in itself.You have probably got what's called "situational depression"..happens when someone dies or something bad happens. I would see a MD..you may need meds..Even if you aren't put on antidepressants, you may need sleeping pills short term. Therapy would also be a good way for you to "talk" about what you feel.

People grieve at different rates. Don't rush yourself...grieve in your own time but I woud see a DOC..

Answer 6

In my experience you are suffering some form of stress. Not sleeping well, forgetfulness, being less patient than usual are all symptoms. Go to your doctor, tell him your recent loss is playing on your mind and ask if they can help. If your problem is really bad they may offer counselling. This works for some people but not all. If you are scared to see the doctor try and talk through your feelings with somebody you know you can trust. My best advice though is to talk it over with a good doctor. Hope you fell better soon.

Answer 7

I agree with puppygirl. You are right about the reason for the insomnia. Get active at night, start excercising before going to bed. Do a thirty minute cardio routine, rest and then take a warm shower at nights. It will help you atleast relax and unwind and will be much easirt to fal asleep at nights

Answer 8

most employers will allow you 3 paid days off for the death of a close family member. Even if that is not their policy most emploers will let yu take the time you neeed off. Just call in and explain.

Answer 9

People often underestimate the value of sleep. If you have tried home remedies and they haven't been successful, then call your Dr. I can see why you are traumatized and he will too. If you continue to have sleep difficulties, it will eventually creep into other areas of your life. I am so sorry for your loss; I know how badly it can hurt.

Answer 10

you will settle down soon(you must give grieving time.readying a book helped. i went to the doctors and got an non addictive prescription which helped but i am back to no tablets and reading a book.big hug