next step meaning asking me to be his mrs. I love him so much and am trying so hard he always tells me that i must be debt free till he will fully take that step. the problem is that i have a lot of debt and i have no idea how or where to even start... What makes it even harder is that it is killing me not being with him and i don't believe in living together before marriage... please help :(
2006-11-19 13:46:24 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if he wants the kitty, he's got to tie the knot.
2006-11-19 14:06:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut up the credit cards -- take two jobs or even three --and good for you for not living with him if he doesn't want to marry you in your financial status now then he shouldn't have you any other way --But further more I would look at this guy real hard--I can understand why he doesn't want the dept thing but on the other hand we love one another unconditionally now what other problem will he come up with after the money thing is gone?? He might just be making up excuses and wasting your time think about it--Too many fish in the sea-- God Bless
2006-11-19 13:56:54 · answer #2 · answered by skizzle-d-wizzle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you in an open and honest relationship with your boyfriend? If you think that you are in a relationship that could lead to marriage then talk with him about it. You may wish to even consider seeking professional pre-marriage counseling. Most of all, talk plainly with him. You never want marry a man with whom you have communication problems.
As for the debts, you really need to get everything written down so that you can lay out a budget. That will help you make informed decisions. Dave Ramsey is a nationally-syndicated talk show host that specializes in talking about such things. You may find his web site useful at:
http://www.daveramsey.com/
Congratulations to you for not wanting to live together with a man to whom you are not married. Do not compromise your principles just because of money. Living together usually causes more problems than it solves.
2006-11-19 13:54:28 · answer #3 · answered by Patrick C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG there are so many more problems in the world than become a Mrs. Be grateful in the fact that he wants to start a life without having so many financial pressures which is the source for so many marriage breakups.
If you don't believe in living together before marriage, that is your choice but you want him to give up choice of being finanicially secure because you just want to be a wife.
2006-11-19 13:49:39 · answer #4 · answered by sarah071267 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks like you dig your own hole with this debt stuff. He doesnt want to start the next chapter in life worrying about his wife in deep trouble. That could end the marriage real fast. Try to get yourself out of debt ASAP or he might give up on you.
2006-11-19 13:51:11 · answer #5 · answered by rusteeford 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you living together? You need to get a job, and work work work until your debts are off, living with him means less payments, so the less the better! I don't know of any other ways you could pay off debt, you could sell your car? lol
2006-11-19 13:48:16 · answer #6 · answered by Zach S 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have the right idea, not moving in before marriage.
It's not a moralistic thing, but the divorce rate is very high for women who do.
Maybe it would be better to find someone who is willing to accept you for the nice person you are, and doesn't set such a high criteria for you.
Afterall, you don't have hoops for him to jump through, do you?
2006-11-19 13:52:33 · answer #7 · answered by smoothsoullady 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A woman should be independent. If you marry him, he thinks that you will become his liability. Pay off your debts first...live with your parents for a year and work.
2006-11-19 13:50:15 · answer #8 · answered by melomane 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
HEY, IF HE IS GOING TO LET A LITTLE THING LIKE DEBT COME BETWEEN YOU TWO SPENDING THE REST OF YOUR LIVES TOGETHER, THEN HE ISNT FOR YOU. JUST GO OUT AND FIND YOU ANOTHER. THERE ARE PLENTY OF THEM IN THE SEA. AND MIGHT I SAY THIS IS A RATHER BIG SEA. TAKE CARE AND GOOD LUCK. ITS OBVIOUS TO ME THAT HE DONT CARE ENOUGH ABOUT YOU. MOVE ON....
2006-11-19 13:49:59 · answer #9 · answered by sherryw_1978 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the subsequent step is to kiss one yet another on the lips, only attempt to maintain him under administration, do no longer enable him attempt something you're actually not waiting for. and that i do no longer basically propose this weekend, i propose for the various weeks to return
2016-10-04 03:51:54 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your debt shows him how sloppy you are with what you buy. If you want to get married to him, then you will need to show & prove to him that you have changed your ways.
Go see a debt. counselor.
2006-11-19 13:52:11 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋