how do i improve my self-esteem and confidence?

Question

I am in a very loving, serious relationship with my bf but when it comes to him, I dont understand why he would want to be with me. I get very jealous of his past gfs because he has said how pretty and sexy they are. He says "youre pretty and sexy too", but I never believe it. My lack of self-esteem is really ruining our relationship. I have never though I was pretty and have always dealt with issues but its more intense with him. I dont know if its because im not my bf's "type"? He loves tan, dark eyes/skin, petite girls while im blue eyed, freckled, and tall. My low confidence in my looks, effects the bedroom as well. I feel like I wont ever be able to pleaure him, afraid to go on top (Im not big or struggling with those issues, i love my body, its just I would have NO clue what i am doing). Please help me, dont be mean to me, I just really need some help in how to make myself better so I can make my relationship with my bf better. thanks

Answer 1

I would have to say dont worry about his past girls friends those were in the past even if he brags that they were pretty you are with him now so that makes you the better one.I have once thought in my life that i was not pretty when i really was but my self esteem was so low. But I said you know what i was made this way and iam going to be happy with it. so just be happy with who you are you are beautiful in your own way.

Answer 2

How do you improve your self-esteem and confidence you ask? First of all why would you want to improve your confidence and self-esteem,just because your boyfriend is always talking about past relationships he had and telling you that they were pretty and sexy. What is wrong with him, you never talk to your present girlfriend about his past girlfriends he has had, and furthermore do not belittle yourself because you don't think that you will be able to keep your boyfriend satisfied because you are different then they are. You are special in your own way there is no one like you and my guess would be, prettier then the past girlfriends your boyfriend has had. Do not try to change for him or any other guy, if your boyfriend keeps on bringing the past into your life, I am sorry to tell you this but, it would be better to cut every tie you have with him because eventually your self esteem will go lower than it already is. Do not try to make yourself better, you are fine the way you are.

Answer 3

True beauty is on the inside, maybe your boyfriend See's the beauty you can't see in the mirror. I also used to have self esteem problems and still do, life is much better now when I look in the mirror I see a beautiful person because I know I am beautiful on the inside where it really counts. I learned at a young age that if I looked in the mirror and seen a beautiful person I was and felt beautiful, if I seen a ugly person I felt and was ugly. I hope this helps.

Answer 4

I can help you here.

We develop confidence with successes...one step at a time.

Your Bf sees something or many things that he loves in you.

Very few of us are Models with sticking Good looks. But, your challenge is to look as good as you can. I am certain that you are very Lovely....especially with Blue eyes and fair skin.

So, wear Make up and clothing that accents your eyes and hair.

It is true that tan skinned and dark eyed females are very attractive to many men....I like that Tan skin and Dark eyes, also.....Blue eyed women are Pretty, also.

All of my family are Blue eyed and Blonds...a few women have freckles in my family. Out heritage is Irish and Scottish.....and they are all very Pretty.

In the situation of Intimacy, I make the following suggestion....Make your self feel within your own body...The more you feel within your self, the better the Intimacy for you and for your Bf. All women have been blessed with the ability to feel great pleasure within their bodies.

I respect the honesty in your question. This is not the forum for me do give additional intimate suggestions, however.

You will be fine and your confidence with grow, one step at a time.

Good Luck.....Hope this Helps.

Sandy

Answer 5

Consider starting a journal. Write down 3 statements each day that are true about you, that are wholely positive, and that are about things that you are, or things that you can do. Such as - I can read. I am a helpful person. I can change the oil in a car's engine. (These are true - about me.) Try to write down 3 new things each day - but if you can't think of anything new, re-read your prior pages and write ones you have already written. It works to help you understand yourself. And you will see you are better than you think you are. That is what self confidence is. Knowing what you are good at and knowing you are good.

Answer 6

hi. you can relate to my thesis topic it's about self-esteem and body image. hmm. First, give yourself top GOD. second, Face the mirror, write your weaknesses and strenght in a paper. Focus to your strength and work out your weaknesses. Try something new.Find True friends. Be confident! say a little prayer in everything you do. You can message me for more advcs..

Answer 7

You sound very pretty. To make yourself feel better, maybe you could do something nice for yourself. Get involved in your hobbies, in things that you love. Also, buy some new clothes or makeup. Change your perfume. It's not how you are now that's bad, but sometimes a change can make you feel better about yourself. That's true for me. Maybe it is for you too.

Answer 8

Be yourself, get in touch with that.

You sound VERY beautiful to me.

You shouldn't worry about bedroom things either. Its when 2 people are very much in love. They crawl into bed and see what happens. If they like each other, its gonna be VERY VERY good. Whatever they do together or don't. Just to hold each other could be amazing. You just kind of see what happens.

Answer 9

YOU ARE PRETTY and you yourself have to know it. Well in loving another person it should start first by loving yourself FIRST. You are unique from hte others and you instill a unique beauty among the others. I guess when you start to love yourself more, it will reflect and people will see that in you and will have to give the same love you are giving yourself. Try it just my 2cents. I hope i helped.

Answer 10

Dump him.
You say you are not his type.
Hello.
Why are you wasting your time ?
There are 3 billion men out there and this number is growing by the minute.
Start fresh with someone who will adore you.
This guy knows he has you.
My guess is he neg hits you and you are not consciously aware of it.
If he does, he will never respect you no matter how hard you try.
Do you know what neg hits are ?