My bf of 2yr8mnths & I broke up about 6 mnths ago. After we broke up we still hung out & it stopped when he's told me some truths what he had done while we were still together. 2 things that really made me feel so angry, frustrated, betrayed & really hurt me a lot. 1 is that when we were just going out for a few months, we had a fight so he called a girl & she came over to his place and he told me that they only watched a movie..away from each other. 2 we were already more than a year & we had a fight and he emailed a girl asked her to hang out with him but didn't happen at all.I also found out about those two things after it happened while we were still in the relationship but what he had told me then was "no it's not true, it's my brother who did it". I somewhat believed him but our fights had increased.Finding the truth really HURT me a lot until now.I still see him sometime & he would say hi but I just ignore him &pretend like he's not there at all. should i 4give him? if so how?
2006-11-19 11:39:05 · 10 answers · asked by alwaysmile 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
most of you said that I should forgive him....that's what i want to do....i planned to just let it all go and say hi to him next time i see him but it didn't happen...it felt so awkward....... when i saw him last night it felt like as if he still wasn't there........... there was like the biggest and the thickest wall in between us.......... he's leaving out of the country in december...... it's pretty sad....i just can't do this anymore..... i do want to forgive him but HOW?????????? what are the ways to make it easy for me to forgive him????
2006-11-19 11:56:51 · update #1
It is always important to forgive to release our self from the person. If you consider that he did some things that he shouldn't have done but then I would imagine that you have too. Maybe not to him but to someone at some time in your life. We are all human and we deal with life the best way we can. Often people behave in selfish ways because they are hurting. It is over and he cannot pay for his wrongs.
Let it go and move on in life.
2006-11-19 11:45:04 · answer #1 · answered by JAM 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Carrying all the anger at him around with you isn't healthy. Its his loss that he treated you like that and did those things but, its over now. You're not planning to take him back (at least it doesn't sound like it) so just reconcile it with your mind that, yes, he did these stupid things but, you will find someone better. Forgiveness is important- not from a faith perspective or a moral one but, just for your psychological well-being. If you get angry every time you see him think about this- anger and stress build up cortisol in your stomach...a chemical with is bad for your system and also promotes weight gain. If not just for your psychological state of mind (you'll be more relaxed if you just chalk it up to him being an ignorant fool) then for your health. That's not saying that you have to forget that it happened, it just means that you let yourself move past it.
2006-11-19 19:43:58 · answer #2 · answered by irishgypsy88 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u guys where not together very long,2 is nothing like 10 and u sound really young to.So i also dout if its ur soul mate either dear.And life is to short 2 stay mad 4 ever he could have been doing alot worse i've heard worse and been threw a lot worse .You might see him 4 a little while and decied that he's not the person 4 u or the other way around .BUTdon't put all ur eggs in one basket he is just one out of many boys or men same thing 2 me lol, lol,lol,that u will meet in ur life.
2006-11-19 20:02:33 · answer #3 · answered by djonecat@yahoo.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgiveness is merciful! To be forgiven is to forgive. You make this call. We all have our own unique way to deal with things. When your heart and mind agree, it will be a simple solution! :)
2006-11-19 19:43:26 · answer #4 · answered by smplyme132 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the two of you can't get along, i think it is time to forgive and forget him, move on and find someone you can trust..
2006-11-19 19:49:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
forgive him,being mad at him isnt going to do anything,your sittin there holdin all that stuff in while hes sleepin at night. forgive him not for him but for you.
2006-11-19 19:46:53 · answer #6 · answered by Tydie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think everyone desireves a second chance.
even if he hurt you be the better person and talk laugh smile at him and say hi
2006-11-19 19:44:58 · answer #7 · answered by sugerpiecutie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can only forgive him if he asks for your forgiveness.
2006-11-19 19:44:27 · answer #8 · answered by hankthecowdog 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No your doing the right thing...
2006-11-19 19:43:26 · answer #9 · answered by troble # one? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe u both should talk about this situation
2006-11-19 19:42:05 · answer #10 · answered by dounut 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋