How do you forgive someone,?

Question

when "I" feel he shouldn't be forgiven. He has continued to hurt people over the years and make their lives more than miserable.
All he has to do at his end, is ask for forgivness, and he is forgiven.
Doesn't seem fare to me somehow.

Answer 1

Jesus told us to pray the "Our Father" prayer and when we come to the part where we pray "Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us"....if we are unwilling to forgive others, we will not be forgiven. Thats pretty clear. We forgive not for the sake of others, but for ourselves so that we can find peace within ourselves, and know we can let go of anger, resentment, and the urge for vengence in our own hearts. We do this through prayer, asking God to give us the grace to truly forgive others and He will do that for us.

Answer 2

Asking for forgiveness has to come from the heart. It must be completely sincere or it is meaningless. So it is a lot more than just asking. It is knowing that what you did was wrong and really regretting it with all your heart.

If someone has reached that point and wants to turn around their life and truly regrets hurting people, why shouldn’t we be willing to forgive them as well? Shouldn’t we want to hlp them so that they can make a new start and not hurt people again.

Carrying around unforgiveness at this point only hurts us because it keeps anger in our heart. So if the person is truly repentant, it’s better to forgive.

Answer 3

Is this a question about Jesus' forgiveness? Well, one very wise friend once told me that almost everyone will truly understand the wrongs they've done when the see God, after death. So almost no one will go to hell.
Your friend (aquaintance/family member, I do not know what he is in relation to you) probably just isnt aware of the fact that these people he's hurt are like him also. He needs more empathy, and then he will understand. Perhaps he is hurting too?

And for your own forgiveness - try and make him see how he's hurting people. But it's also important not to judge - we're never going to know someone's internal reasons for doing things. All you can do is be there for him.
x

Answer 4

“Some simply don’t know how to forgive,”
The apostle Paul wrote: “Continue putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely if anyone has a cause for complaint against another. Even as Jehovah freely forgave you, so do you also.” (Colossians 3:13)

It would be good to ponder the following questions:
Is the offense worth speaking to him/her about? Is it really impossible for me to let bygones be bygones in the true spirit of Christianity? If I were in his place, would I not want to be forgiven? And if I choose not to forgive, can I expect God to answer my prayers and forgive me? (Matthew 6:12, 14, 15) Such questions may well help us to be forgiving.

Answer 5

It is hard for me to answer this question except from the perspective of a Christian.
As a Christian I know that I must forgive to be forgiven. The Lords prayer says "Forgive me my trespasses as I forgive them that trespass against me."
True forgiveness comes from the heart and not the head. After we forgive others, it allows us to heal and I think that is why The Father tells us to forgive.
How to do it can be a more difficult thing to do.
But I can tell you one thing for sure, if you pray for some one you will find it easier to forgive them.
Pray for them everyday, earnestly. Ask the Father to show you what/how you should pray for them. But start your prayer out with a right heart. Talk to the Father about the pain this person has caused and how that effects you. Ask the Father to give you pure motives in praying for this person. Then you will be able to pray for this person.
As you go to Jesus to intercede for you to the Father, he will know your pain and if you let Him he will comfort you.
Prayer has as much power to heal you as it does to help you learn to forgive some one.
It all starts with a small prayer.
Continue and you will be strengthened.
ICL
Rosa

Answer 6

Perhaps, in our way of looking at things, but if we try to get a little heavenly perspective, God wants sinners to come to Him and welcomes them always, with a heart of forgiveness.
I know what you mean, though. For example, I know a Christian lady, who was sexually abused by her father when she was young. She said she would have a VERY hard time being in heaven with him if he ever got saved. VERY understandable from our earthly point of view.....but somehow, I have to believe that when we get to heaven there will be a time of reckoning; where all of this pain we've caused one another will somehow be resolved with the help of Jesus, Himself. (That's just my personal take, btw.....) Basically if you DON'T forgive, you lock your heart away in a prison where no one can touch it, and eventually, all that's left is bitterness. It's the greatest gift you can give yourself, as well as others, 'cause it will set you FREE! God bless.

Answer 7

All I can say is I am glad that forgiveness isn't up to you.. No one deserves to be forgiven. God's forgiveness cost Him the life of His Son. It would be narrow minded of you think that since Jesus would be resurrected that His death wasn't forever.. If you believe that you have no idea what the nature of God is. If someone comes to Christ and asks for His forgiveness I am willing to trust God that it is a good thing.... Jim

Answer 8

I get the idea from ur questions that u have lived a good life compared to some.. which is why u have an innate belief that "the world 'can' be better".... well...

if u dont want to forgive then dont, its not rocket science

Answer 9

If people continue to do things to hurt others, they SHOULDN'T be forgiven. It's just that simple.

As far as what happens between them and God....I haven't a clue.

But I don't see any reason why other human beings should forgive people who do evil things.

Answer 10

first of all you cant on your own, you have to ask for your heavenly fathers help, and you must pray that the person sees the error of his ways, and finds a way to forgive himself too. you can forgive him for what he did , but you can tell him he will never get a second change until he changes his way, Jesus did not say forgive the person and let them do it to you again. i hope this insight gives you some thoughts that provide you with the insight you need to handle this