I have been divorced after 2 years and had stayed pretty much alone for the entire time. I was really missing out on intimacy and sex. So, I went with someone whom I wasn't as attracted too physically. Her name is Kari. It was nice but now, I sort of want to go to the next girl. A few days after the sex, and sometimes during the time we were out doing things, I thought about my ex-wife. So, I called the ex and talked with her a while and told her that I still had feelings that weren't completely dead and she pretty much reciprocated the same feelings. I concluded that I am just gonna have to move on from the ex knowing that a little part of me will still love her. I felt better. Trouble is, I am pretty sure that Kari likes me and might be hurt. I want to tell Kari the truth and I am asking all of you what is the best way that would be the most repectful way of doing that? The really weird part is now, my ex-wife wants to come over and have sex too. I am not willing for that
2006-11-19 06:29:11 · 12 answers · asked by Jeff W 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The best way is to be honest since the begining, just talk to Kari, honestly and looking to her eyes that you are not prepared to make a commitment with her, and that you still have feelings for your exwife..it would be shocking for Kari, but at the end she will realize that the truth is the better way, just be polite but honest...hope that helps
2006-11-19 06:35:34 · answer #1 · answered by lovetoyou 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is really no way around hurting Kari. She is going to be hurt no matter how respectful that you are with her. Bottom line is that you have to be truthful and let her know that during the relationship that you still had feelings for your ex-wife. Tell her that while you and her were seeing each other that you really, really tried to love her and that it is nothing personal but you are still in love with your ex-wife, that you two have a history and that you would understand if she never wants to talk to you again but that you wish her well. And say Goodbye. If you are a Christian person then you pray for her and move on. Don't keep stringing her along or prolonging the inevitable that would be the worse thing that you can do.
2006-11-19 06:43:41 · answer #2 · answered by Sexcchick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with Kari. The longer you lead her to believe you are fulfilled in this relationship, the more you will hurt her in the end. Tell her that you're going through commitment issues since the divorce and you're not ready for a real relationship. You can tell her that you probably weren't ready for this, but assure her that the problem does not lay with her. Don't tell her you want sex elsewhere. Don't seek it from a mutual party because it WILL get back to Kari; and then, you'll just be evil.
Do not go back to your ex. You both agreed it's over. Don't make loving and leaving her a habit.
Good luck.
2006-11-19 06:43:30 · answer #3 · answered by brownjrfive 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have sex with ur ex if u want, tell Kari the truth even if u get a slap, accept it coz, u used her
2006-11-19 06:36:06 · answer #4 · answered by vio_prince 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well hopefully you have learned from this. Women do not ususally think the same as men when it comes to relationships.
Now that you have decided to move on have enough respect for her to tell her the truth (but done in the most tactful way). Don't lie! We women can pick up on that and that hurts even worse than the truth. Who knows maybe she is thinking the same of you.
2006-11-19 06:36:57 · answer #5 · answered by Mikki 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
who are you kidding? yourself. sounds like you're a rotten guy anyway. you knew you weren't over your ex b4 you had sex with kari. you just didn't care. so now you wanna sugar coat the situation. there is no other way but just to tell her. she may be graceful enough to accept your apology. but if not, what can she do?
2006-11-19 06:39:22 · answer #6 · answered by shaglemongirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest but not rude. Try to put it in a nice way and let her know that it's not her fault, it's just you have all these different emotions and feelings bottled up and that you need some time for yourself and to think.
Also, a bit of advice for yourself, I think you should move on from all the women in your past, start being independent, and go from there.
2006-11-19 06:31:53 · answer #7 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that she is beautiful. I think that is the most respectful way to say it.
2016-05-22 03:51:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you started the relationship, friendship, whatever you want to call it, you should have told her from the beginning.
Now you need to sit her down and tell her straight forward. Do not wait any longer.
2006-11-19 06:33:05 · answer #9 · answered by purpleone726 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Like the old Nike slogan "Just do it!"
2006-11-19 06:32:03 · answer #10 · answered by BORED AT WORK 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋