My 7 year-old son?

Question

I am a mother of three, My 8 and 4 year old daughers do not give me much of a problem. My 7 year old son however, cries for every reason that you can possibly imagine. I have tried time out, spanking, bribing, taking his favorite toys away, but nothing seems to work!!!
My live-in boyfriend has been EXTREMELY tolerant of the situation. He has even tried talking to him, conveying to him that his ACTIONS, are what cause other peoples' REACTIONS to his bad behaviour. (He thinks nobody likes him) But it NEVER gets through to him.
He does not respect me or ANYBODY, nor does he fear me.
About two weeks ago, his behaviour became so outrageous, that I was on the verge of sending him away to live with his father, the only reason I didn't is because his father is irresponsible!!!
What can I do next???

Answer 1

You need to take away his whole world. Strip his bedroom of everything but the bed. No TV, no video games, no friends over. Only through good behavior can he earn these back. Also, and this might sound contradicting, but is necessary. Spend some more one on one time with him. Maybe a one night a week where your daughters get to stay with grandma while the two of you go to dinner. Bad behavior is usually a cry for attention. Your son may feel threatened by your boyfriend. Worried that he is going to take you away. Just reinforce that you will always be there for him. Stay strict with the discipline. You can not tolerate it now, because it will be harder when he's older. Do not send him away. That will only make things worse. Just my two cents. Hope that helps. Best wishes and take care.

Answer 2

im the only girl to be born in like 3 generations on my dad' side and i have 4 brothers and 3 first cuzins who are all guyz (on my dad's side) and i don't know what my mom would do without me....i feel so bad for her because ALL 4 of my brothers are such a hassle for her....they have the same behaviors as ur son and it's kind of like a guy thing so pout and yell until they get what they want....my mom is constantly complaining about how much of a hassle guyz can be....u are definitely in a hard situation.....i think maybe if u do not spank, bribe, or take away his toys, and just get him to SIT down with u and talk to u.....since he is 7, im guessing he may be having problems in school....usually tht will not be the case because he is too young.....tell him u love him and that u are extremely annoyed and stressed out by his actions and if all fails, take him to a doctor who may recommend u to see a child pyshciatrist (cant spell).....it may be costly but she/he may know the problem......good luck....i really wish i knew ur son's exact problem

Answer 3

Have you considered that he is doing it for attention? My son did the same when he was little and a counselor told me it was a cry for more attention from his father...and bad attention is better than none at all. It sounds like the little guy has gone through some trauma...perhaps a nasty divorce? Kids feel the insecurity and maybe he just thinks you're going to send him away, too. I think you need to see a licensed therapist for this one, and don't wait a minute longer.

Answer 4

I think he needs to talk to someone other than you and your live in man. Does his father have any influence in his life? That could be the number one reason! Just sending him away is not the answer you must show him how very much you love him in any given situation. He is crying for attention weather it's negative or positive.............. I do not have kids and I know sending him away is not the answer! You must tolerate him because he his your son! Try to spend more one on one time with him. You can't give up!

Answer 5

well, take a deep breath and relax a min. I have 4 kids and my 9 yr old does this. You need to get him in to see if he is add or adhd. Also, jsut see if more positve reinforcement works when he does something good make it a big deal and maybe this will help. He could be trying to control the situation because all arguing with him will do is get your blood pressure up. Try ignoring it and jsut compliment his positive things this could help if he is jsut seeking attention

Answer 6

i was the same way when i was young. i would cry over everything. but i did have an older sister that picked on me and teased me. psychiatry didnt work because my psychiatrist blamed all my problems on my sister. that didnt help. all in all it mad me more angry at her and now we dont have a good relationship at all. if you do decide to get a psychiatrist, moniter what they are saying to your son.
this could be crys for attention as well, negative or positive it is still attention. depending on the situation try not to make a fuss over his fuss. sit him down and have a really good talk with him about everything that is going on. that if he is having problems with whats going on your going to get him someone he can talk to. (the psychiatrist) give him privacy though, if mom is in the room listening its still like talking to mom which if hes not doing it now he wont do it with a stranger. good luck and eventually he should grow out of it without too much trouble if you get the help he needs now.

Answer 7

it sounds to me like your son might be clinically depressed. Depression shows itsself in different ways in children and in adults. I know because I was clinically dpressed at that same age, as was my son.To help him learn better behaviours and show him ow to express his unhappiness without acting out, some time with a therapist who works with children would be a very good idea. I finally got my son into therapy when I was told that chidren the age of your son do commit suicide. Please don't take any chances.

Answer 8

you answered your self your live in boy Friend, children have different ways of acting when there father is not in the home, that's his way of crying out for attention

Answer 9

I think you should see a child psychologist. It sounds like your son has opositional defiant disorder (ODD). It will only escalate if you don't get help now.