How do you someone that is Diabetic to Listen?
I have this boyfriend I love very dearly. He is Diabetic. He has not taken meds for months now. He is out of control. He is doing stupid things and don't give a thought to what he is doing.
He won't go to doctor and don't want to take med's.
He say's or does something one day and the next day he argues with me that he didn't say that or do that.
I want to save our relationship. I was to marry this guy this coming year.
But...I can't get throught to him and it is always a problem, now finacially and is disrupting the whole house hold.
He says it is me, and nothing is wrong with him.
I am ashamed to say this, but I finally broke down after months of trying to talk to him and told him if he wasn't going to get help that he needed to pack and leave.
I am tore up about this but if he won't do it for himself let alone our relationship..what am I suppose to do? It is effecting me now. I have college classes and finals coming up.
He makes me feel bad..but I need help.
2006-11-16 02:51:36 · 14 answers · asked by Dawn 2 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Diabetes
I have talked and told him how it is effecting us. One minute he says ok and am sorry the next day he is back to thinking only of himself.
Like I said it has been months going through this and I am tired. I have started smoking more, biting my nails, and I don't want to love on him now cause of all the things he is doing and not doing and he wonders why we have grown apart.
I will say that I am going through the change of life thing ..but I don't yell or like to argue. I don't feel like having sex..but with his additude..it doesn't help me in that area. I just want things done and preped for winter and he gets upset i have things for him to do. He don't work and has made a comment that there is others here that can do something while he is off working on his blazor or sitten in front of tv.
We have no money, cause he wasted it or used it for something that could of waited.
I feel it is boyfriends place to take care of me..not my son who is 18. I go to college full time/no job.
2006-11-16 03:06:54 · update #1
i'm so sorry for you that u have taken on all the burden of your boyfriend's health issues..for some reason, some people just cannot accept it. part of his ill-temper may be caused by his high/erratic blood sugars. getting them under control would make him feel better both physically and emotionally..another thing..uncontrolled blood sugar will cause impotence due to nerve damage..apparently he is still interested in sex..tell him that he may soon be unable to get an erection. it might sound silly, but i am serious..diabetes is one of the main causes of blindness, kidney disease (leading to transplant), heart failure, loss of limbs, nerve damage/which leads to erectile dysfunction, and any number of other complications. i agree with the others that u can lead a horse to water, but u can't make him drink...in other words..it's got to be up to him. he knows you are concerned, but unfortunately, has chosen to do nothing about it. make sure that he is educated about the complications of diabetes and the effects on his body that HE ALONE is causing...i know that u love him dearly, but is it worth staying with him? and at what cost to your emotional and physical health..just an FYI, i am a type 1 diabetic and have been for 41 years. i value my health and my life, and i would not skip a dose of insulin EVER...best wishes to you and know that you have done the best you can to encourage him to lead a healthier life. his health will only deteriorate if he chooses to do nothing..please look after yourself.
2006-11-16 09:30:40 · answer #1 · answered by nanster 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-20 06:48:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I honestly dont think it has to do with being diabetic. My sister is 25 and diabetic. Meds do nothing but try and help with health issues not tempers or personalitity's. Maybe he doesnt like to tlak out loud try writing him and if he doesnt remmber what he said one day record him to prove that your not lieing and that this is how he acts. He could have A D D or even have Bipolar spells. Getting help: only he can mke that desciosin but if he loves you then he will at least make the effort to change if not seperate for awhile. YOu have alot going for you with college an all. I am not all that great with given answer but I al least tried.
2006-11-16 02:59:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm afraid there's nothing you can do. You can't do it for him and if he isn't going to do it for himself then he'll have to face the consequences. It sounds like he's in denial of his problem and he has to wake up himself. I only hope it isn't too late when he does. You have to decide if it's worth it to watch him destroy himself. The end could come soon or it could take years of being on an emotional roller coaster. He already sounds verbally abusive. Maybe you should just move on. If it isn't his diabetes it will be something else that will make him behave this way.
2006-11-16 02:58:58 · answer #4 · answered by Joanne B 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm really sorry to tellyou this but it's really HIS decision as to what he will do. nobody can get him to see what he's putting you through. Sounds like he doesn't want to accept its a problem until he does there is really nonething you can do for him. Everybody who has had this problem wants to be "normal" but were not hes hurting himself by not doing anything about it. Maybe if he goes through a life treating process he will get the message. Good Luck!
2006-11-16 05:41:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest, if he is not taking his medication, you will be better off leaving him. Because your future life with him will be full of heartbreak as he succumbs to the complications of diabetes, as he surely will.
As to whether his erratic behaviour is caused by high blood sugar it is impossible to say, but that might possibly be the cause. With some people high blood sugar does cause behaviour changes.
But you are doing the right thing. If he is not prepared to look after himself for your sake, then believe me, you are better off without him. If he doesn't change his ways, you have no future with him.
2006-11-16 03:11:29 · answer #6 · answered by langdonrjones 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are in the right here - stick to your guns. He sounds like he is in denial over his disease. If he can't be trusted to take care of himself, how can he be trusted to take care of you - or any kids you might have?
Don't be ashamed to say that you gave him the ultimatum. Be proud that you stood up for yourself, and that you realized what you had to do, and you did it. Now you have to be strong enough to follow through if he doesn't change.
2006-11-16 02:55:53 · answer #7 · answered by Ralfcoder 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he doesn't love or care about himself. Sounds like you would be showing yourself some love to kick him to the curb.
2006-11-16 04:50:13 · answer #8 · answered by bess 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him its hurting you and maybe if he does not care about himself he has a low self esteem. Try talking to his mom. My bf seems to listen to his mom more than I
2006-11-16 02:56:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
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2016-03-22 01:19:39 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋