If somebody does something that I don't like - but I don't worry about it - is it really a problem?

Question

...but I do worry - I'm trying to work out a new way to cope with my problems!

Answer 1

it really could be a problem. it depends on what it is that you don't like. if it's something major, then maybe you really should say something....honest to god....tonight, i reported my best friend of many years to the animal rights group, the espc or w/e, for beating his dog. he punched his dog extremely hard many times because he caught him going through someones garbage outside. we got into a huge arguement cause i wanted to take the dog home with me for the night. he wouldn't let me. i left, called our friend and told him what happened. he told me i should report him, call the police, and call my friend's dad. i then sat there for a while debating on whether i should go ahead and report him or let it go cause friends don't rat on friends. well i decided to report him cause i felt it was the right thing to do. but it's 6:30 am and i haven't slept at all tonight. (best answer? lol)

Answer 2

Look... its quite a simple system really.

The scenario is this: Someone does something you don't like... the first thing you have to consider is how strong your opinion on it is....
Is it something you absolutely detest... or merely something that causes you mild annoyance?

Secondly, you have to consider the consequences of interference and their potential harm.
Could attempting to stop a person doing a particular something you don't like cause any serious detriment to yourself or not?

Thirdly, its simply a matter of weighing up the consequences of inaction against the consequences of action. If you feel really strongly about it then doing nothing could be a serious detriment to you... moreso than trying to stop it... Then again, if you don't feel so strongly about it, or you feel fairly strongly but trying to stop it will get you into a whole crock of sh!t.... then maybe its not worth it.


For instance... two scenarios:

#1. A seat is about to be freed on the tube during the morning rushhour... Someone else looks like they're also primed to take the seat the moment the other person leaves. This rather bugs me since it hurts to be crammed in a standing position for ages. Do I stop them taking the seat by putting my umbrella in the way, or do I just let them have it? ...
I realise that the very worst that can happen if I stop them is that they may be disappointed and / or a little offended, but they're a total stranger and that won't make a shred of difference to my life... and its either that or stay in a horribly uncomfortable standing position myself ....
So naturally I stick my umbrella in the way, assert my dominance and take the seat. (I did so this morning).

#2. I hate S*ny. I hate it beyond all else. I would gladly give my life to destroy said company if I could... or at least the portion responsible for the heresy that is the Pl*yst*t**n series of 'consoles'... but thats not an option.
Now imagine I spot all kinds of advertisements in GAME that the PS3 has just come out... This is an absolute disaster for me. So do I go into the shop with a weapon and destroy all the PS3s, thereby stopping it from being sold there and potentially preventing a load of people from succumbing to the evils of S*ny... or do I stay put and suffer in the knowledge that S*ny will spread its corruption yet further, yet ensure that I'm not arrested and thus in a position to bide my time until I can unleashe a far more large-scale destructive plan upon them?
Clearly I have to stay put and resist unleashing my fury... There is a better time and place for such things, and the downsides to my actions would outweigh the upsides if I were to go ahead with it.



See?

Quite simple really.

Answer 3

The problem only exists because you don't understand or agree with the motive behind their actions. For example....You might see a wildlife programme on TV where the lion has chased and captured a vulnerable, little animal and wants to eat it....Some may say "Awwww. That poor creature. Why is that lion doing that?" When in actual fact it's the lions nature to behave that way. It isn't doing anyhing wrong.

Similarly, although it isn't human nature to hurt others, some people don't behave with the human qualities most of us take for granted. So when they act in a way not befitting their stature, it's only natural for us to feel hurt. However, when this happens, we can choose to view it as a challenge that tests how human we are by over-coming these negative emotions.

Answer 4

Every single second of the day somebody does something that one doesn't like....whether it is mugging someone in the street, or lighting up a fat cigar just as one is going to eat something, or....should I go on? If we let each incident become a problem, life would be nothing but an insurmountable series of unending problems.
If one lives amongst people in a city, one has to develop an insensitive side and just not notice. It is the only way to remain calm.

Answer 5

I think that's a great way to be. Took me years to find out that confrontation with people takes more out of you than just letting things go. They'll be repeating what they did and will get retribution at some time. Always works that way. I have been betrayed by employers, been victim of miscarriages of justice but have always found that the perpetrator has received their cumappance. Karma can take the strain and leave you free to get on with the important stuff.

Answer 6

so do you worry or don't you?

if you do and everyone does remember this. be confident in yourself with your mistakes and strengths. be aware that there will always be people criticising you for wrong reasons and because they want to try to change you.

just don't let each one get to you, because no one is perfect and life isn't only about what people think of us negatively, but accepting us and liking us as we are. we have to prove we are confident and love ourselves to ourselves first, so people will see that and respect us. it isn't a gauarantee everyone will respect us, it is a guarantee that we can stand strong on our own when we get disrespected.

Answer 7

If someones does something that you don't like then you should tell them that you don't like if otherwise they will keep doing it not knowing any better. Its okay to worry about things thats human nature just don't dwell on it too long.

Answer 8

No definately not unless you want your life to be full of them. Just let it go. We all do things other people don't like but its the not noticing and caring that really count. No ones perfect

Answer 9

this is a contradiction of course its a problem to you most of us don't like things that people do that we don't like and if we said or did things about it we would be constantly falling out sometimes we just have to accept it and go with the flow but sometimes we have to say something but if your like me you don't like making waves but sometimes we have to just make sure its worth it be rational hard I know but sometimes your doomed if you do and doomed if you don't sorry

Answer 10

If it doesn't worry you it is not a problem at least for you.