O.k.- I just moved 2 a new state 9 mo. ago- I met this guy-who lives with his girlfriend-he & my husband r friends-he comes over every day-we text each other every day-all day-talk about having an affair & everything-it hasn't happened yet-but i'm sure it won't b long-i've been married 8 yrs. but only together about 4--i'm not happy--so anybody got any ideas on what i should do? Affair-or not?
Additional Details
49 minutes ago
o.k.-the really crazy thing about all this too--is that my husband wants me 2 screw another guy & just a day or 2 ago made a list of names 4 me 2 choose from--this guy i'm already talking 2----his name wuz on this list!!!
-My husband & i have separated on many occasions & we have cheated on each other n the past & he has ED d/t diabetes & he tells me if he could get it hard he would b out screwing anyone he could--i believe if he could-he would-that's 1 reason among others i don't feel guilty (and b/c he's trying 2 get me 2 screw another guy anyways)..
2006-10-25 18:09:19 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well if your husband is letting you then go do it...
this is really weird...
just divorce him .... why are you wasting your time on him?
2006-10-25 18:13:21 · answer #1 · answered by ♥™ 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
hell yah thats crazeeeeeeeeee....
but you know, you guys need emotional counselling.. because as what you have said you've been separated in many occassions, thus this means that you both love each other still.. Maybe the possible "emergency" thing you should do is talk to each other, share each others faults and point of view, if you think that you could still fix the problem. You know what I think about your husband wanting you to scre another guy, maybe because he cheated on you before and you know, guys are typically silent but very observant, maybe he knew that there is something romantic happening between you and his friens, so to ease off his guilt feelings about him having an affair before, you know men are always like that, for us women not to give it as a reason for separation, they would find ways for us to be trap in a certain situation that someday when you blame it on them they have something to blame for us too..(men are wiser remember)
Your husband loves you, its just that he wanted to test you if you will go out with someone or not... if you love your husband, then don't go for an affair, you dont want your reputation to be lost because of just a man..
Marriage isn't just about having fun, there are times and situations that happens to test on how long and until when you have to hold on to each other, sometimes there are really temptations that will test the faith and trust of a relationship.. it happens but you have to hold on to the vow that you made when you married...
The best advice I could give you is talk with your husband tell him everything that is happening between you and his friend.. tell him everything and promise yourself that you will keep the vow you had before, you know the problem may be that you were just only having some boredom in your marriage, then try having some vacations with your husband, bring back the honeymoon times.. tee hee.. sometimes and most of the time, quality time with the person you love will make your relationship stronger and even more colorful.. okay? do the best you can to save the marriage, it is not only one person that should handle a relationship, it need both the parties to fix and rebuild the relationship,,.. simple talk will help a lot...
have a good day!!!
2006-10-25 18:35:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why would you sleep with someone elses man and your friends with her. if you do then it sounds like your just trying to find happiness that your not getting at home. you see that this other couple are happy and you want that. sounds like to me you should think about a divorce. why live some where that your husband and you are not happy. your relationship isn't healthy.
---your husband wants you to go out and sleep with these other men so he can use that against you when you have an argument. get out before it's too late, your just going to make each other miserable
2006-10-25 18:17:34 · answer #3 · answered by becca j 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you and your husband should seek counseling before things get way out of hand!!!!!! Maybe thos list he has is just a test to see if you'd cheat??? Perhaps he already knows you and this guy are talking regularly? I would end the relationship with this guy and focus more on you and your husband's needs.
2006-10-25 18:13:18 · answer #4 · answered by Nicole M 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he wants you to do it because of his ED, that's a personal decision that you two need to make together. Let him know that of the list he gave you, that's the person who would interest you. Better to be honest about it, especially since you think you'll have his approval. However, don't forget about his gf, that's the one person no one seems to be thinking about in this situation. Is she going to be okay with it? Don't count on secrets to stay secret, especially if more than 1 person knows the secret. (In this case, 3 would.)
But definitely don't lie to your husband, if you're going to lie to him then you should just get divorced.
2006-10-25 18:27:02 · answer #5 · answered by calliope320 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your marriage is getting crazy!
if you do as what you husband say, that is crazy!
talk with him about that relationship, don't waste your time,
also, and if you husband made the list let you choose any guy to screw it , i guess he give up you already,
i suggest you end of this unhealthy relationship, try to find someone who really needs you.
2006-10-25 18:29:45 · answer #6 · answered by cecilia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u aready wanna do it and he has told u he would b out doing everyone in town if only he could....I would give him his lil fantasy he thinks he wants..then tell him "whatta ya know..just like i thought, he is a far better screw than u ever were..an by the way.. i want a divorce"! Then leave an quit wasting your time w' him.
2006-10-25 18:17:40 · answer #7 · answered by ~*~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
BOTH OF YOU NEED SOME SERIOUS COUNSELING, BECAUSE THIS IS CRAZY, IF YOU ARE SO UNHAPPY WITH'
EACH, CHEATING ON EACH OTHER THEN WHY STAY IN
THE MARRIAGE. GET OUT OF THIS IF THIS IS THE ANSWER
TO THE PROBLEM BECAUSE OTHER PEOPLE THAT GET
INVOVLED IN THIS MESS MAY HAVE SOME ISSUES WITH'
THIS, I KNOW THAT I WOULD IF I WAS THE ONE PERSON
THAT YOU WANT TO GET WITH. DO YOU THINK IT FAIR
TO PLAY THESE GAMES WITH OTHER PEOPLE FEELING]
MAYBE YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND LIKE THESE GAMES.
BUT YOU NEED TO THINK ABOUT OTHERS.
2006-10-25 18:17:27 · answer #8 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends how and why you're talking to him. But face it girl, if you're not happy, you should get a divorce and commit to another man, who really cares. It's important for a girl like you, to be happy with her master. He's trying to get you to cheat on him? What does that tell you? Get out of that scenario, now!
2006-10-25 18:13:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your not happy because you do not feel loved in this relationship, my husband would never do this to me. He would be ready to kill my a$$ and vise versa. Find someone who loves you and does not need to see you with other men. And let the on-line thing go he could be in it with your husband to swap mates. You do not have to do anything sexually that you don't want to do to prove anything. And you are not a sick pervert you just want advise.
2006-10-25 18:28:35 · answer #10 · answered by livlafluv 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I find this type of behavior appauling and stupid.. Do you not know the risks of transmitable diseases? My I hope I live 10,000 miles away from this perversion. Whatever floats your boat.. But when you end up pregnant with a 3 eyed mutant baby with STD's, just remember how it came to be..
Stay away from affairs! Stay away from threesoms and foursomes... You married to be with one man!
2006-10-25 18:15:08 · answer #11 · answered by jinmetsu_rasetsu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋