Why don't people take social anxiety seriously?

Question

I feel like I'm so shy (terrified of social interaction, will cancel plans...avoid plans...etc) and people around me just don't validate that social anxiety is a huge problem. It's a major phobia. There's a reason I'm a hermit so much ... and it's not by choice. I would love to be able to be active. There has to be a way (besides therapy) to cure this torment?

Answer 1

I know exactly what you mean. I have the same problem. My husband acts like I choose to be like this but it is something that I don't feel like I have any control over. I will work myself up to the point of being sick over something as simple as going over to his parent's house for dinner. They only advice I can give you is to just push yourself to do the things that make you anxious. Normally if I can at least get through it, it won't seem as bad when it is over or halfway over. Good luck! Email me if you need to talk....janeenpatten@bellsouth. net

Answer 2

HI.
I also suffer from depression, social anxiety - the works!
I wasn't always as bad a s I am now. I always make plans with people then back out at the very last second. I dread family get togethers and I do poorly in support groups. I use to be a singer in a night club and a medical technician! Now - I am a hermit. I resent my family when they go to events without me.. I figured out where this started, but unfortunately this person will never leave me alone or has some vile way of relaying her thoughts to me via others - we are talking about my mother. But.. maybe I can help you
How can I help you?

Look at the some of the reasons or triggers related to your anxiety. Do you have issues with your appearance ? When you go to social events will there be people who intimidate you who are present?

I think in a lot of cases someone in our lives beat down our self esteem - really made us feel bad about something (grades,appearance,thoughts, bad relationships etc..) and let us know that we were unacceptable. Hearing this enough will break your spirit.

Are you really ashamed of yourself? If you are really ashamed of yourself for something - go to a therapist and talk about it. I have found that friends and family are great, but they have a tendency to bring up our weaknesses at the wrong times. I have also found that some of those family members are the reason I am so self concious to begin with.A therapist will not do that and they will keep your issues to themselves. A therapist can be told anything - and I mean anything!They can also help you address that person who hurt you and put that person into a whole new perspective.

Keep in mind your anxiety is real but you are a special and significant part of this great big world. Realize that everyone has something to hide and they have faults and weaknesses - they are human. You may also find that a lot people actually admire you and have a much more positive perspective of you than you think. Step out and get involved in a charity or something which involves your help - this will definitely help.
Good luck

Answer 3

I have issues concerning the social phobia also. I have been going to a community college for the past 2 years and sometimes I get panic attacks where I will be sitting at an exam and I would freeze and my hand would tremble and I couldn't write on the test. Then I would think everyone can see me and I would have to leave to cool off. I always feel as though I am not good enough outside of "my world" The only thing that has helped me is school but I feel like I am about to fail because I am having them every day now while in class. I am questioning what will work also. I know that putting yourself in tough situations can help. I have had to be honest that I have a problem I even told everyone in my class because I just started a 2 year program with everyone there and I want them to be aware. However now I may have to do an oral presentation. This could be a problem!!! I want you to know you are not alone. That helped me anyways. It is very real and very scary and VERY uncomfortable. But dont be a hermit, know there are millions just like you and try to look at the world like they are all like you are. Everyone is somewhat self conscious. I wish you luck and if you ever need to talk you know how to find me.

Answer 4

I don't think with the symptoms that you describe. That you will be able to get your problem under control with out going to a therapist. There are more people like you than you think. I work as a nurse in the emergency room. We see patients quite a bit who are having a panic or anxiety attach, but think that they are having a heart attach or other serious health problems. I would strongly suggest you try therapy it can make such a big difference in your life. If you don't have insurance to cover it there are many clinics that will let you pay based on your income. There are also free clinics. you will just have to check around in your area.
Most people do not take this disorder or any other mental health problem seriously because they do not understand them.
But you can get help. And have a more normal life, and be able to enjoy new things.
Good Luck! And please do go for help.

Answer 5

I have suffered from this problem all of my life and I'm 38. I've been in and out of therapy, tried many different medications, etc. I just try to get through everyday as I have found that forcing myself to be more social actually does seem to help. Good luck with your situation! P.S. Don't give up on therapy or medication altogether. You may just not have found the one that works for you.

Answer 6

It often takes mental disorders a long time to get treated with respect, even by the medical community. There are many disorders that are accepted today that were thought to be "all in the patient's head" as little as 20-30 years ago. Cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) is a good method for helping to deal with patterns and behaviors that lead you to be socially anxious. You can also see a medical doctor or mental health professional and describe your symptoms and talk to them about possible medications that might help. I know Paxil is used in some cases. Be sure to read up or talk to the doctor about side effects. I wish you the best.

Answer 7

Most people do take it serious it just take a few couple of people to make you feel all alone. I think most people have a person or two in their family that has an extreme phobia of some sort. Don't feel bad

Answer 8

I understand how you feel because I'm exactly like that. People always say "why are you so shy?!". They just don't understand because they don't feel how you feel and they probably never will, because most people are outgoing. I don't really know any cure, but sometimes you just have to get up the courage and be the first one to say hi. I know its really hard, but I just usually try to find someone as shy as me or not to outgoing because it can be intimidating. Usually shyer people will say hi back, (not saying others won't, but they might try harder) and be nice too because they are like you, looking for a friend, just to shy to say hi.

Answer 9

Because everyone believes that you can just automatically "stop" your self from feeling and acting the way you do. But when in fact, you really can not. It takes more than will power to change the way that your brain thinks. Blame it on the chemical balances in your brain....

Forget those folks anyway. They will never understand how it feels to have an anxiety disorder.

Answer 10

Whats your aversion to therapy? It will really help you. Plus you may need to try some meds, like Zoloft. Seriously, get to a psychologist...they help ppl with this very same problem every single day. You owe it to yourself to do whatever you can to get over this, don't you think?