If you were in my shoes what would you do?

Question

This is a hard one. I am dating a girl right now who I have been dating for about a month now. She is a really sweet girl, she has a good heart, and although looks aren't a factor for me, she really isn't the most beautiful girl on earth. But thats not it. We just don't vibe well. She won't hold my hand, and seems intimidated by me. I am a nice person, and never give her any reason to be this way toward me. I mean, she isn't trying to be mean but I can tell we just dont have it going on. Should I break up with her.. or stay with her.. or what? And if I should make the break.. how would you do this? All input would be GREATLY appreciated. Sorry for rambling.. I just feel scared.

Answer 1

Hello. All though you have not provided a description of yourself i will venture that you are at least an average looking fellow. Your ages can be a huge factor for elicitating a correct response to your situation. I will give you three thoughts usuesing the limited information you have provided. 1. Your both young and dating is new to this person so she might not know quite how to respond when your together. (shyness is quite common) 2. Your fairly good looking and she might be afraid of getting too involved for the fear you might upgrade to a more attractive girl.(you know..Whats a guy like him doing interested in a girl like me?) 3. She might just have really strong friendship feelings toward you and dosn't know how to tell you without hurting your feelings. Most people young and old in a new relationship might not progress at the same speed. For whatever reason who knows. But since you have already noted that hand holding is just not her thing than perhaps you should ask directly if perhaps the realationship should just remain on a friendship level. Never jump too fast and smother the relationship. Think of all the things that you or her were doing each day before you started seeing each other. Sometimes if you try or any one for that matters moves things along too fast it can be too much too soon. But do ask yourself a few questions and be HONEST!! 1. Why am I attracted to this person? 2. Why was she attracted to me? 3 What are the main things we seem to have in common. 4 What do we seem not to have in common. 5. Do I like her more than just a friend......
It is great to have a friend that you love and would do what you could always no mater if it were a male or female. At times we just hit it off really well and develop deep feelings but it dosn't mean you are compatable as a couple. Hope this helps and post another question if you would like some more input. Best of luck to you.

Answer 2

Maybe she is just still shy and dont kno if she should make the moves but i would stay with her cause i mean she can change. Give her a chance i kno its been a month but you never kno things can turn out good.I am pretty sure she has dtrong feelings 4 you but dont know how to show it without acting funny or shy. Maybe she just not sure but i mean its seems like yall are a cute couple and she must like u 4 some reasons inorder to be with you. I mean like u said she might not have the greatest looks but its not always about looks.Just give her another chance maybe thibgs will change or something, and if ur not comtroble just tqalk to her and let her kno how you feel and im pretty sure it will get to her. Another chance is all she needs.

Answer 3

It is new I'm sure and she is most likely just really shy I would just talk to her.. and see how she is feeling. I would never break up with someone for that, if you guys talk and you still don't feel right then just let her know that it is just not working out.. at least u will be giving her a chance. It is all about communication. Be a nice guy! there isn't that many out there. Good luck!

Answer 4

The most important thing is that you be true to your feelings. If you love her, be honest and talk about how you feel. She might be having a problem of low self esteem, maybe she feels unworthy of you so she holds back how she feels for you. Help her feel more secure about your relationship. On the other side, if you really don't love her, be honest, tell her in a calm way, in private. Don't take her on a date and be kind with her just to break the news to her. Remember to be a gentleman,don't cheat on her, just be honest. She will appreciate that. Good luck!!

Answer 5

since u guyz have been going out for a while now, u should feel comfortable with and around each other. If ur feeling this way, u have to talk to each other about it. And if u cant do that, then there is no true connection between the two of u. cuz a huge thing that a couple needs is comunication between the two. Just talk to her and find out wats up, good luck

Answer 6

Try talking to this girl. Find out why she is the way she is. If at that time, you decide to part, then just tell the truth and part nicely. There is no need to be ugly in a break up unless someone did something bad to begin with.

Answer 7

girls tend to feel intimidated by boys (especially attractive ones)when there not the most beautiful girl in the world b cuz shes probably not used holding hands and things like that so I say u give her some time to warm up to u and if she still doesn't then you have a problem.

Answer 8

Don't feel scared. But if you are not happy with the relationship than you must break up with her. It makes no sense to date some one that does not feel the same way that you do. You should want someone to be happy to be by your side and love you in public. Not all that sloppy kissing but be able to show compassion in their yes when they see you.

Answer 9

you don't want to string her along in a relationship that you know isn't going to work. Its not fair to you, or her. But before you break up with her, you might want to tell her how you feel. Maybe she doesn't realize what she's doing. If you have talked with her, just tell her the truth, don't lie to her when you break up with her. Tell her that you just feel that staying together would hurt both of you. She's going to be hurt no matter how you do it, but she'll respect you more if you break up with her truthfully.

Answer 10

IF YOU DON'T VIBE WITH HER THEN BREAK IT OFF.. DON'T STAY WITH SOMEONE YOU'RE NOT HAPPY WITH LIFE'S TOO SHORT... ANS AS FAR AS BREAKING UP WITH HER JUST BE HONEST ABOUT HOW EVERYTHING IS GOING AND HOW YOU FEEL...BEING HONEST WILL PAY OFF IN THE LONG RUN..AND DON'T BOTHER SAYING WE CAN BE FRIENDS BECAUSE IT USUALLY DOESN'T WORK OUT WELL..JUST TELL HER YOU'VE GROWN APART AND IT'S NOT WORKING FOR YOU ANYMORE AND YOU TWO SHOULD PART WAYS . TELL HER IT WAS GREAT WHILE IT LASTED BUT IT JUST WASN'T MEAT TO BE... GOOD LUCK THESE ARE NEVER EASY THINGS TO DO...KEEP YOU'RE HEAD UP AND YOU'RE HEART OPEN....:)