How should I go about telling my fiance that if he is not happy with my decision to stay at the school I am at, then we can't truly be happy together? He has been pressuring me into leaving the University I worked realy hard to get into, to go to our home town's community college. I am hurt that he can't understand why I don't want to go to the school, and he is not "willing to wait on me much longer." I really love the guy, but I can't deal with this kind of pressure.
2006-10-25 08:55:32 · 12 answers · asked by Sleepy Head! ;) 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
When you truly love someone you should be able to make any sacrifice. This goes both ways, but I think it is more important to make a sacrifice to let the other follow their dream, then to sacrifice the dream.
I would put the decision on him. Tell him you love where you are at and if he can't be with you in the city you are at, then he can't be with you.
If he asked you to move somewhere to persue his dream job, it would be different. But it sounds like he is just being selfish and wanting his life to be perfect. His job, and his girl in his town.
2006-10-25 09:04:22 · answer #1 · answered by tightlies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to tell him exactly what you just wrote. he needs to know how you feel. tell him that there is no way you are going to quit this university that you worked so hard to get into. tell him if he really loves you than he wont pressure you anymore and respect your decision. if he really loves you than he will, but if not than he will keep pressuring you to quit. you dont need a man like that, all he seems to care about is what he wants, and what is best for himself. if hes going to marry you one day than hes got to realize that there will be two of yous to make decisions and that hes going to have to compromise. if he cant do this than there will be worse problems when yous get married, so until he can respect your decisions than i think putting of the engagement till he can learn.
2006-10-25 16:03:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should do what you think is best for you, there'll be other guys but opportunities like these might never come again. I'm not gonna tell you the typical "do what your heart says" because it doesn't really help. Just sit down, figure out your priorities, and keep in mind that if you do carry on you might be sacrificing the guy, not now, but maybe eventually. So just think about it and take your time. Figure out the pros and cons
2006-10-25 15:59:38 · answer #3 · answered by Triathlete88 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why should you start out having to be the one who has to compromise. Why isn't he waiting much longer, what does that mean? He has asked you to spend the rest of your life with him, but yet, he won't wait much longer. Personally, I see that as a RED FLAG!! What else ???
If you want to stay at the University until you are finished, you need his support.
2006-10-25 16:03:06 · answer #4 · answered by kayboff 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what a jerk he should be supportive of your needs and not what he wants or needs a marriage is hard enough to deal with you cannot be selfish tell him you love him but you are going to stay in the university what is he afraid of is he trying to keep an eye out for you then cut your losses GF he is not a good match for you please be with a guy that will love you no matter what school you attend !!
HUGS
2006-10-25 15:58:42 · answer #5 · answered by AngelVirgo9206 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that all is true, then he does NOT love you as you do him. Time to tell him to have a great life and get on with yours. If he's being THIS controlling now...just think about what things would be like in a few years?
2006-10-25 15:58:22 · answer #6 · answered by biggdogg_indy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
explan to him how important it is for you and that you have worked sooo hard for it. dont compromise your life decisions for him just because he doesnt want to wait on you..thats not fair to you. You will never be completly happy and will always wonder what if....do what you want to do and what feels right to you. If he cant get on board then you may need to seprate.
2006-10-25 15:59:43 · answer #7 · answered by Kelli C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's your dream, he cant force u out of what u worked really hard to get into. sure u love him, but. . . u got to let go of things in your life, even if it means things u truly love. move on. . . .
2006-10-25 15:59:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him know exactly how you let us know - your education is important to you, and you're not going to compromise with him on something that's so crucial to your future. Ask him if this is really worth him losing you over.
2006-10-25 15:58:59 · answer #9 · answered by Deleted 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him to go on and do what he has to do. he knows you love that school and he don't care. i am sure he has his reasons for acting the way he is and you have your reasons for your actions. you will forever recent him if you leave that school be smart don't be a retard......
2006-10-25 16:02:58 · answer #10 · answered by stephanie c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋