I have been close friends with a girl for 3 years (which I've fallen for). I became her friend with no intention of it leading to this point but the more i got to know her, i became really intrested in her. I finally told her about my feelings, how i think she is an amazing person to me. From great personality to gorgeous looks. Although, She simply told me that she was not attracted to me and doesnt see it changing. She also tells me that she loves our friendship and doesnt want to loose that. I have tried to get over her but i can't!!!... she also always wants to be around me and always trying to be where i am. Even at times when i might try to go on other dates. Sometimes that makes me feel like she is showing instrest by things she does, but i cant tell because it might be just me wanting those feelings. I do not know what to do...I am at the point where i would give anything to have a chance to be with her and give a relatioship between us a shot.
2006-10-25 08:43:07 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
DUDE! You have fallen into the biggest female trap there is.
She loves the fact you want her, but doesn't want you.
You have two alternatives (speaking from experience here).
One: maintain status quo. Just let her keep on using you for ego gratification (You already told her how you feel and you saw how much it mattered to her) you will be in agony, but hey, you get to be around her as her puppy.
Two: Cut the cord. You must realize that to her you are just a puppet. A puppet that she can and will control to her heart's content and she will NEVER want you BECAUSE she CAN control you. She will never see you as the man you are if you don't behave like one. There are other dynamite women out there who would die to be truly loved by a man.
I know, I have been down that road, and I finally found the right one.
2006-10-25 08:57:00 · answer #1 · answered by Lord L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some reason in my experience telling girls how you like them, let me count the ways... just turns them off. It's one of those strange things, but it's true. Use compliments sparingly and use the sappy feelings talk sparingly too, or they'll think ur full of it.
Friendship in alot of ways can have an inverse relationship with passionate attraction, or whatever you want to call it. It kinda sucks, but once it's been established that it's a friendship, it's hard to turn it into a relationship.
Your only chance is to make a move and try to appeal to her passionate fantasies, bypassing her conscious thought entirely. But this is a daring endeavor... and could jeopardize the friendship, while at the same time not being successful.
I'd say try to hang out with her less, but don't lose touch. As long as you are hanging out with her ALOT though, it's gonna be hard to shake your feelings. You have to get some distance, detach yourself a little bit. Then let the romantic thoughts towards her fade away.
2006-10-25 15:59:04 · answer #2 · answered by djdep13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is why a man and a woman can never be best friends. Someone always gets feelings.
You did what you were supposed to do. You were honest and told her how you felt.
But you have to respect her feelings. If she doesn't want to reciprocate, you have to respect that, grasp it, and move on.
Personally I wouldn't be able to remain really close friends with her as it would bother me too much.
2006-10-25 15:52:21 · answer #3 · answered by acvader 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it sounds like you're probably stuck. You can try to get her interested in you somehow, but it sounds like she's probably made up her mind about you. Don't worry, you can get over her, and you probably will eventually, just tell yourself you don't really need her and go find some other girl. If you're REALLY lucky, appearing difficult to get might turn her on enough for you to hook up eventually, but I doubt it.
2006-10-25 15:46:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is not interested it's probably because she now thinks of you as a brother or just one of the girls so her feeling probably will not change. Once you become close friends it's harder for girls to see you for more than that.
2006-10-25 15:46:49 · answer #5 · answered by justme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
say ok thats fine. but then justy simply ask her on a date. just as friends. try to make it the best night of her life. she may change her mind..????? never no
GOOOOOOOOOOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-10-25 15:47:31 · answer #6 · answered by AshleyyRoxx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋