I'm 27 wks pregnant it was unexpected, I'm not married but i've been with my kids father for 6 yrs. He wants me to get fixed after this baby, but I'm scared and like I said I'm not married and who knows where I will be in 5-10 years, What if we dont work out in the end and marry some one else and he wants children. In a way I really dont want any more because I have a 3 1/2 old son and a 2 1/2 old daughter. I'm scared of getting my tubes tied and for him it is not even an option to get a vasectomy , I told think thats right. Don't get me wrong I love this man. And he is a great father and a good man. I just dont know what the future will bring does any one know of any good birth controlle because I don't like the pill thats how I ended up pregnant this time the pill didn't work.
2006-10-25 08:06:19 · 21 answers · asked by Louisa F 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
I want to thank all of you for being very supportive and giving imput instead of being mean about my question.
2006-10-25 08:26:19 · update #1
He is the father to all my children and I'm 25 years old
2006-10-25 08:47:22 · update #2
If you still have doubts about whether or not you would like children in the future I would advice against it. If it is him who does not want any more children he should be the one to get fixed and guarantee this never happens to him again. It sounds a bit selfish to be placing the blame and responsibility in your lap.
2006-10-25 08:10:54 · answer #1 · answered by Shannon H 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
well either dont have sex, or use birth control pills with condoms and spermicide every time u have sex. you shouldnt have to get your tubes tied because hes too scared to get his junk cut on. The process for a vasectomy vs the process for a tubal ligation or a hysto for a woman. Its a lot easier onthe man. its a small cut into the testicles where they snip and tie off the vas defernes that carries the sperm to mix with the rest of semen. most of the time the surgery is done in office or in a same day surgery place. there is some swelling, whereas if a women gets a tubal or a hysto it envolves several large incisions and a longer recovery time. Hope this helps. im pregnant with my second child with my husband and hes getting a vasectomy after this baby is born.
Good luck and congrats on the kiddos!
2006-10-25 11:18:37 · answer #2 · answered by llllll_amanda_lllllll 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try an IUD, they are usually good for around five years and are almost foolproof. You don't have to mess with anything daily, weekly or even monthly and if you do decide you want more children fertility usually returns fairly quickly after the doctor removes it. This can be a bit pricey, but less expensive than a child and like I said it lasts quite a while. 99.9 percent effective. You should not get your tubes tied if you are not comfortable with the idea, it is your body and you are right, you don't know what the future holds.
2006-10-25 08:36:52 · answer #3 · answered by manderstwin1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not an option for him to have a vasectomy?
I am sorry, not a good enough answer.
If he knows he absolutely doesn't want anymore children then HE goes in.
If you know you don't then YOU go in.
IF you both agree, I still say V-section. Its a 15 minute procedure, and they walk away from it. There are NO side effects, and no reason why he can't take 20 minutes out of his bloomin' day to have himself taken care of.
YOU on the other hand. BIGGER deal. They have to OPEN YOU UP. You're hormones are directly related to your ovarian tubes. YOU didn't like the pill?!? You will HATE having your tubes tied.
Send him in. Regardless.
2006-10-25 08:20:12 · answer #4 · answered by Oh, I see 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Will he wear a condom? Have you tried a diaphragm? Maybe you should have an IUD prescribed by your doctor or ask him for the birth control patch.
You have alot of options and also, he should take some responsibility for contraception too.
If it doesn't work out, he will still be responsible for the support of the children. Though it sounds like he wants to stay with you if he has been with you 6 years. Why doesn't he or you want to get married?
Good Luck
2006-10-25 08:25:57 · answer #5 · answered by orygunduk1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not 100% sure do NOT get your tubes tied. My ex and I went through this. He ended up getting a vasectomy. I ended up getting remarried and having another beautiful baby. You just don't know what twists and turns life will take. If he feels that strongly about not wanting any more kids than it is up to him to take action. I would discuss your concerns with your Dr to explore the best options for B/C. Everyone has different success and failure rates with various birth control. It is your body and you have to do what is right for YOU. Take care and good luck
2006-10-25 08:22:02 · answer #6 · answered by his temptress 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would talk to your OB and maybe do something like an IUD which is long term birth control. got a Mirena IUD put in and its good for up to 5 years and then if you still dont want kids after 5 yrs you can get it taken out and a new noe put back in. It;s 99% effective. If you've had a csection though that won't be an option.
Otherwise maybe the depo shot.
I wouldn't get my tubes tied if I were you... and if he wants you too.. too bad... he wont get snipped for you so oh well.
Good luck - but your OB should talk to you about this so you know all yours options.
2006-10-25 08:11:22 · answer #7 · answered by Rae T 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should do it only if you want to . Sorry but it is your body and he is not your husband so he has no say. You should set up an apointment with your doctor and they should be able to come up with a better form of birth control. You definitly may change your mind later about more kids especially if you break up and meet someone else. I have heard it is not that bad from friends and family members. I started to do it with my ex-husband and changed my mind then met someone else and wanted more kids, but he had a vadectomy before we met. He wish he didn't do it, but he said his ex-wife was messing around and she had a another man baby while they were together. So make sure it is what you want. When your kids get older sometime you go through the stage of wanting another baby.
2006-10-25 08:27:16 · answer #8 · answered by barbie2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IUD. Also called the five year plan by some. You can have an IUD inserted by your OBGYN. Is is just as effective as a tubal. In 5 years you go back and have it taken out. If you still want to wait on kids have a new one put in. After 2 years if you want another baby take it out. No biggie. Very effective, but not permanent. I wish someone had told me about it. Then I could have had kids with my new husband.
2006-10-25 08:16:07 · answer #9 · answered by Liz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't say your age, that is kind of important. If you really think you may want to be a mom again, don't get your tubes tied. Is he the dad of all your children? If he is, and definitely doesn't want more kids, he could get a vasectomy. There is always a better kind of birth control, talk to your gynecologist.
2006-10-25 08:36:46 · answer #10 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋