My family lives about 400 miles away from my wife's sister's family. Financially, they are doing very well. We started getting together around Christmas and meeting half way between our homes. They have older children and have taken a liking to a hotel that costs $170 - $250 a room and has a big indoor water park. We have small children and want to be able to keep an eye on them in a less chaotic swimming environment. There are some very nice hotels with indoor pools and water slides that cost more around the $85-$110 range that work very well for our family. This has become a point of conflict for us. My sister-in-law thinks that we both have good jobs and should be able to afford the more expensive hotel. We've told her it's too expensive for us and doesn't meet our needs. They don't want to get together this year and cited our inflexibility as the reason. They also don't want us to stay in two different hotels and get together for dinners and such. Am I wrong?
2006-10-25 07:30:11 · 8 answers · asked by BAM 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Let me add some details. My wife and I do have good jobs and could swing paying for the more expensive hotel. Call me frugal, but I have a hard time justifying paying more for something when I could find something much cheaper that meets our requirements. My sister-in-law also thinks that I don't like them. That's not the case. I'm just standing my ground and trying to avoid a 'keeping up with the joneses situation.' The difference in money could go to reduce our mortgage, go in our kids college fund, etc..
2006-10-25 07:43:06 · update #1
No, they want what they want and you want what you want. You both have different aged kids and different needs. You want what's best for your family and most appropriate and so do they. Since it's only once a year and it's a vacation getaway, you should get to spend your money however you want and what will best benefit your family and make your kids the happiest. Don't feel bad or try to please them! They don't care about you or hurting your feelings. They say you are "inflexible"?! What about them? What did they do to try to be flexible? All they gave you was their choice or none!! Go with your family and have fun! Don't bow to other people's expectations, even if it's family. I stopped doing that long ago and am much happier for it. Good Luck!
2006-10-25 07:39:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wrong? no, BUT..what does your wife think? The whole time you were writing and explaining..you didn't mention what your wife would like to do. Maybe she like the the expensive hotel, maybe she wants to get together with her family, and the cost isn't that big of a factor to her. I totally agree with you, but if I were in your shoes, I think I would open the wallet and go with the expensive hotel if my wife wanted to go. Yes, I agree with you the sister-in-law maybe pushing this to far, the other motel would be just as good if not better. I have stayed at flea bags and I have stayed at the 250 a night..I find middle priced better all the way around. I don't wasting money just because...I would rather put it to a good use. It's your call, your sister in law is making you the bad guy. Are you going to call her bluff? Or are you going to fork out the extra dough so the family can be together for the holiday. Please ask your wife... God bless us all............
2016-05-22 13:15:21 · answer #2 · answered by Evelyn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, your not wrong. How can she expect you to do something that is out of your means? SHE has the problem, it looks like she is just showing off too. Do your own thing with your family, u dont need people that will hurt you financially
2006-10-25 07:32:51 · answer #3 · answered by Photographer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are right, this money could be used for more important things. but here is also something you can try, why not go to each others homes, you year you go to there's the next they come to yours. sure it is a long drive, but will save everyone money in the long run. and if your, sister in law does not want to do this. then she is the one that is being stubborn. stay home and enjoy the extra money your going to save.!!
2006-10-25 09:35:55 · answer #4 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rent you a motor home and let her stay where she wants.That way you can have a good vacation without conflict.....Really check the prices---it is fun.......they sound like DRAMA to me..
2006-10-25 07:35:41 · answer #5 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think you are wrong at all. i would think the same way as you if i was in that situation
2006-10-25 07:33:06 · answer #6 · answered by Niki 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask her to pay for the room and you will be more than happy to do any this she wants
2006-10-25 07:37:13 · answer #7 · answered by just_me_1955 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it doesn't work for you it's not wrong.
2006-10-25 07:33:02 · answer #8 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋