Whats the best way to word your wedding reply cards so you don't get unwanted guest!?

Question

For example, if you only inviting a friend without a guest..... what's the best way to word it so they don't fill in 2 on the reply card.
I have been hearing horror stories with invites- how they invited people without guest and they just filled the reply cards in with 2 anyways.

Anyone have a "fool" proof way of wording it??

We are in a very small building that only holds a 150 max so I can't have extra people coming!

Answer 1

There is no fool-proof way of doing it. The best way, though, is to address the invitation to only the person you are inviting. Address the inner envelope with only this person's name, and hope they get the hint. If not, and they reply for two, it is acceptible for you to call them and point out that they RSVPed for two, but that you didn't invite a guest.

Answer 2

Okay, here's how I understand it. You like Joe well enough. He's a friend and you want him at the wedding. But you absolutely hate Jane, and you're afraid that Joe will bring Jane as a guest. So long as you want to be polite, here are you choices: 1. Do not include a guest for Joe. Ideally, this would be an across the board decision for all of your single guests. On the RSVP card, still include a spot where they can write down the number of people attending. That way, you'll usually see if they intend to bring a guest. If Joe writes "2" on the card, then you can call him and explain that you only invited just hime, and that you're sorry but can't accomodate the guest. 2. Invite a "guest" for Joe, and hope for the best. There is absolutely NO WAY that you can politely tell one of your wedding guests that they are not allowed to bring certain guests to the wedding. If you include a "guest" for Joe, then that guest is whoever he chooses. Best of luck!

Answer 3

I think that weddrev has the right idea, although it will take more work.

If you are printing the cards yourself I HIGHLY suggest you make an excel spreadsheet and then do a mail merge of the names onto the printouts (then you don't have to type each name seperately).

Otherwise, If there is a blank for names just take the liberty of filling that out yoruself.

EX:

Mr. & Mrs. John and Jane Smith Will / Won't Attend

....and just let them circle the responce.... then they cannot add in another name. There is no spot to write in anything.

I saw the one suggestion that said to put a rider in the envelope that since the space is small only the names on the invite are invited and think that you might want to shy away from that. Given, people will most likely heed that; however, you will probably come off rude.

Answer 4

No way you can write them is foolproof. Regardless of what you do, *someone* will screw it up because they are clueless. You'll simply have to phone the people who fill in their card improperly and explain that they made a mistake-- only people who are named on the envelope are invited.

Of course, people who have been using the "and Guest" method of inviting are the ones who have caused a lot of people's confusion-- Some invitees assume the "and Guest" even when it is not written. You're NOT supposed to use "and Guest" on anything, of course-- people are invited to social functions BY NAME ONLY.

Answer 5

The best thing to do is to address the invitation by name specifically (i.e. Mr. and Mrs. John Smith) do not add and guest or family if they are not to be invited.
Then on the reply cards instead of having "number to attend ____"
just write "will be able to attend ____ send their regrets ____"

You will still have some unexpected, it is inevitable. However not allowing them to put in a number should make it clear that only those on the invitation should come.

Answer 6

I personally would not have the effrontery to bring along an uninvited person to any function.
the only time I asked about the possibilty of bringing others ( kids) was when the bride had verbally told me that there was an invitation ( I was making the dresses for the bride & attendants) for me & my husband. I asked if it included our kids so that if not I could make other plans for them- I was not concerned about them not being invited,
I feel that it is reasonable to invite singles on their own if you are not aware they are in a permanent relationship & also not to invite friends children along.
this year I attended the wedding of my daughters friend - even though I had not received an invite myself - but only because 2 weks prior to the wedding the friend told my daughter that as her b/f could not attend then to bring me along. Bride had known early on that only my daughter would be going as she lives 2500k's away * was making a special effort to be here & I did know the couple

the suggestion to add another card saying ""ONLY invitees etc"" would probably be the best way to go & if the guests really do care about you they will understand

Answer 7

If they are a friend then they should understand if you call them and tell them that due to the limited space there is no room for dates, that it is only for family and friends.

If they are not allowed to bring guests then you should not have a space for how many, just a reply if attending. Don't be too worried about it since things happen and people do not make it, so you will not have too many people. We had like 20 people not show up at our because it rained.

Answer 8

well unfornutely if you are inviting the person, most people do not go alone to weddings. most go with a date.
one way is by you personally circleing the people invited. but this can always be crossed out and they put hoe many they want.
remember also if only 150 people fit in this party, you should always invited from 160 (10 more) because there are always people who say they are going to go and dont. but if you have a limit of 150 and think that some people are going to bring additional guest, then only sent out invitations to 140 people so like that there is 10 extra chairs just in case 10 more people show up.
i personally dont like going to weddings, birthday alone. showers i have no problem. but i usually either take a date or friend because i feel more comfortable being with someone i know instead of all strangers.

Answer 9

Address the envelopes so they name only who is invited. If it's a single person without a guest, just put "Mr. John Smith." That's it. Unfortunately, some people will assume they can bring a guest. If they do, make someone call them (this is a good mother-of-the-bride job) and tell them that the invitation was for one person only. Good luck!

Answer 10

Unfortunately there are many people who feel they must bring a guest or they won't have any fun. You can get on the phone as soon as you get RSVPs for more than the number invited and explain that it is for the invitee only. You can also hire a "security" person to make sure no one comes to the reception that isn't on the guest list.