I never thought that something so stupid would bother me.... My boyfriend of 6 months has never had pets before and I have two well behaved dogs (i have grown up with all sorts of animals) My boyfriend enjoyed my dogs so much that he decided that he wanted to get a puppy himself. Well 5 weeks ago he got two puppies and to be quite honest its consuming our relationship. I am feeling disconnected emotionally. I even gave him a talk stating that they are dogs and that they dont need 24/7 attention like a baby. They sleep with us go on trips with us. I cannot even have a conversation with him at dinner because he is giving his attention to the dogs. I am getting pretty fed up I need attention our sex life has dwindled and our relationship has been put on hold. I am not an attention hog and believe me I am not exaggerating on the level of attention that is given to these puppies. What do i do ? I thought about giving him his space until the newness wears off. Please I need advice.
2006-10-25 05:14:03 · 5 answers · asked by mimi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Believe it or not my aunt has seperated from my uncle because of dogs. My uncle loves them so much that they became a wedge in their relationship. He would be angry if someone would make the dogs get up out of a chair so they could sit down. They took up the bed and forced my aunt to sleep on the couch. So my aunt gave him an ultimatum, the dogs or her. They have been married for over 40 years. He chose the dogs. So she left, got her own house and moved to another city. I'm the first one to tell you that dog is man's best friend and no one can come between a frienship like that, but for it to complicate a marriage or a relationship like that then their is definately a problem. My aunt wasn't the problem, it was my uncle. You aren't the problem in this situation. He needs to focus on your feelings because you are supposed to be a special human being to him. We have a dog here at our home and he is awesome. But there is no way I would let a dog come between me and the ones I love. Remember too that this guy might have attachment problems. Seems like he can identify with an animal and not you. Try politely talking to him about this and show him that you are serious. People might laugh and joke about this but it is a real problem. Some guys play tons of video games because they are socially challanged. Tell him that you have feelings and need attention too. If he doesn't change then I suggest you seek attention from someone more deserving!
2006-10-25 05:30:11 · answer #1 · answered by RIDLEY 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Does your boyfriend have a short attention span? It sounds like you may end up playing second-fiddle to whatever 'new, bright, shiny' coming his way for the rest of your lives, if he's the sort that gets this intensively wrapped up in the newest gadget/game/pet/whatever in his life. If he's so obsessed with new toys that he sacrifices the well being and health of relationships and other aspects of his personal life, he's a person you might just be better off without. If you feel your relationship with him is worth salvaging, plant your feet firmly in the ground, establish that those puppies aren't the only mammals in his life that need time, care, and affection, and all relationships need *continuous* nurturing. He can't just put you on the back-burner while he galavants with the freshest new thing in his life, then pull you to the fore when the initial fascination wears off. To quote Jennifer Aniston's character from the movie 'Picture perfect,' addressing an ambivalent Kevin Bacon; "You know, you're the guy that--no matter what you order--you'll always wish you'd ordered what's on the plate of the guy next to you." Your boy might just jump from new thing/hobby/person to new thing/hobby/person in a perpetual quest of 'new car smell'.
You might want to ask yourself a few probing questions about your boy; has he ever maintained a constant hobby, has he had a previous relationship(s) for any significant length of time, or has he gone flittering from one to another, with flimsy excuses for why they didn't work out (let me guess; the girl always did something wrong?)?
He should be periodically cuddling up with you on the couch and letting the puppies play with themselves/other dogs. Even new parents yearn to get out of the house or have intimate time within a matter of weeks. Depriving you of a healthy, vibrant sex life (assuming it was there before) is definitely a sharp slap in the face; he's acting more like a pre-adolescent boy than a man. Feel free to show him your query and answers; maybe HE will get the sharp sting of reality he's obviously had yet to suffer.
2006-10-25 13:29:28 · answer #2 · answered by Leena Rosen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I Dont think your boyfriend really wants to be with you.. THINK ABOUT IT IF A DOG GETS MORE ATTENTION THEN YOU, THEN WHAT THE F IS REALLY GOING ON HERE? no ones that ugly, damn. i just dont think your working hard enough to keep it up for him..as a man sometimes we like to see the ladies accomplish things. not nothing. Get out get a job...
heres a couple of other options that just got spouted in the room
1. Kill The Dogs
2. Pay attention to other guys
3. Make him fight for your love
4. Pay more attention to the dogs then he does
5. Self - stimulation
IDK listen, I've got a cadillac, and its sittin on hundid spoaks
holla
2006-10-25 12:21:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
The puppies are new to him- and he is obviously having a good time. Can you join them with your dogs? Make it an outing?
There are plenty of sh**Y pet owners- don't discourage him form being a good one. Hang in there a bit longer and try to be understanding.
2006-10-25 12:19:31 · answer #4 · answered by rottymom02 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Consider that he isn't having any more sex than you are and it isn't bothering him.
2006-10-25 12:21:49 · answer #5 · answered by Buffy Summers 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋