If your mom said you could not date the person you wanted because he was black. . . She has threatned to kick me out 5 or 6 times in the past year and I am tired of it I wanna go and I have place to go. . .She has also tried to say it's my fault my grandfather it dieing and It's not he has cancer I can not help that even though I wish he didn't the person I am dating is amaing and would never hurt me and my mom can't believe that because he is black i can't hang out with my best friend anymore because her grand parents think that my mom is crazy (i agree) she braged about sending me to a doctor because my boyfriend happens to be black and I dated a few black guys last year to but its not like I won't date a white guy my mom told me the only reason that I date black guys is because I have low self-esteem and they make me feel better (I beg to differ) but all my stuff is packed should I move out or not. . . would you (and yea I do have a place to go. . .)
2006-10-25 03:52:35 · 34 answers · asked by Smile 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Obviously you should try talking to your mum first - but to be honest it seems like you put up with far too much already - what your mum says sounds like utter rubbish, I'd say if you've tried to patch things up and it hasn't worked - move out.
2006-10-25 03:56:29 · answer #1 · answered by Lucy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes...if you are not a minor...go ahead and move on and start your own life. You will give your mom a break and yourself a break. You mother will not change how she feels...and she's having a hard time dealing with gramps. So...go on your own. Be sure you're not sponging off of anyone else; get yourself a job, if you don't have one, and learn to be responsible. Then you can visit mom whenever you want and know how good it feels to support yourself and make the sort of friends you want, no matter what color they are.
OH...maybe you're dating ethnic guys simply because you mom disapproves??? Think about it.....godloveya.
2006-10-25 03:57:52 · answer #2 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you have a place to go and a way of supporting yourself then it might be a good idea if she is being verbally abusive towards you ( ie blaming you for your grandfathers illness ).
It's not a good environment for you to be in, but you alsohave to take into account her background and the way she was raised. She may never accept you for leaving her home in what she will consider a decison between her and your boyfriend. If that's something you think you're ready to handle, then it's up to you, but just make sure you know the seriousness of the situation.
2006-10-25 03:56:19 · answer #3 · answered by lovely 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, I'd move out! You're mom it wrong to tell you who you can and can't date especially if its because of their race. People who think that way make me sick. There is just as much of a chance for you to get hurt by someone your own race as there is you getting hurt by someone who is black. The risk are the same so I don't see the problem. If he treats you good then your mom should be happy for not threatening to kick you out!
2006-10-25 03:57:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
First off... it's sad she's trying to blame you that your GF dieing... and you having low self esteem is again her attacking your self=esteem to get you to conform to her way of thinking... parents have trouble with the fact that there is s time when they have to let go and let their children get out in the world.
You say your bags are packed... get out and live your life... I am assuming your old enough to leave... we're all one race, humans and to find someone you say that's amazing is something that doesn't happen every day... I think you have answered your own question... Good Luck...
2006-10-25 04:06:21 · answer #5 · answered by Sandy 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hey listen to me she's your mom!!!!!!
now we all intitle to our own opinon, its hard for her to nderstand why you with this guy at the moment, but if its gonna make you feel better by moving out aswell as her then do it, that way she wont always be your case about who you with and who you not worth, she not undersatnding you because she thinks she knows better which mothers usally do but in this case i cant say she right you happy with this guy and he makes you feel great so leave the house, but just coz you leaving the house dont burn your bridges with your mom and forget about her coz when the **** hits the fan the first person you will run to is her so think carefully
we are all in denial about something
hope things go well with your mom and grandfather
and dont ever thing its you r fault
2006-10-25 04:05:09 · answer #6 · answered by brian 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
should u move out. well i have twin daughters that are 7, so im sure ill have issues when they get older. i think she is just tring to protect u, not that he is a bad guy or that he is black but she is just scared to lose u. he should understand your moms opinion and support u mentally and help u thought this. you have to rememeber when and if he decides he cant deal with ur mother he will leave and ull have to go back to mom, you needs her more that u think right now and it sounds like she needs u. rememeber u cant change decisions u make u can only pay for them later.
2006-10-25 04:00:47 · answer #7 · answered by justincase119 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
how old are you?, and i am sorry that your mother is so shallow and a bigot, you would think that sense it is 2006 there would be more love and acceptance in this world. However; if you are under age you have to live by her rules till you are on your own, so i hope you get the man and the dream and good life, It isn't your fault your grandfather is dieing either.
2006-10-25 03:58:26 · answer #8 · answered by seilygirl 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I moved out cuz my parents didn't want me dating a Puerto Rican. Nevermind we are Spanish and N.W. African ourselves, with some Irish thrown in! I moved out. Ended up homeless, sleeping on park benches (he joined the army), then got pregnant and my parents refused to see the baby cuz his skin would be darker than ours and a reminder!!!
Well, I ended up marrying the guym had another kid. We divorced 10 years later but my parents started changing their tune after the birth of my first child and now my parents are pretty normal. My dad even had a sex change so they can't say nothin now!!
I say love is universal and has no prejudice, if you are ready to move out then do so. But its not easy! I hope your parents come around :( Good luck!
2006-10-25 03:57:43 · answer #9 · answered by Sweet! 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You're what some hispanics would call a "mallatera", and they would tell you to stick to your own.......Do what your heart tells you, but also be prepared for all the flack you're getting from your mother and from "Yahoo Answers"
That's just one side of the story, and we will never hear HER side. So keep in mind the answers you're getting are based only on your info. I honestly think you may be making her out to be more of a monster than she may actually be. Remember, you're not so perfect either. None of us are.
2006-10-25 03:56:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you old enough to move out? If so, you should, if you want to live life your way. Otherwise, if you're a minor, you need to stay with your mom no matter how messed up you think her thinking is. Her house, her rules. If you do move out, don't say or do anything that will jeapordize your relationship with her. She is, after all, your mom and she deserves respect for that position, even if she doesn't deserve it for her attitude.
2006-10-25 03:56:43 · answer #11 · answered by NEWTOME 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋