Why do men freak when they have to pay child support??

Question

Then when the court papers are served all of a sudden they want to be a family even though they have not been there emotionally, physiclly, or financially for the child.?

Answer 1

scum.. not all men though thats not fair on the good guys

Answer 2

Most people have a mean streak,when involved in a divorce. The children are used to control the where abouts of the other party. This has been my experience in the past dealing with divorce parents. It appears that most women remarry and then move away disallowing the X's to see their children. When women move out of the state of jurisdiction the man has little to no recourse in visitations. I also know of a problem with the State of Ohio that a gentleman was required to paying for child support till the child was 27 years old do to the fact that the man and woman bath moved on with their life's and the State took the money because neither could fill to resend the court order. They both lived out of state.

Answer 3

My husband has to pay childsupport for his first son. He never gets to see him and he's not sure the money is going to the child or not. He feels there should be some kind of card ( like a credit card type) that will only let the mother buy things for the child. Maybe if something like this would happen and the men knew exactly where the money was going. Men would be more willing to pay their support.

Answer 4

Very Generic usage of "Why do men". I am a man who has paid child support on time for the last 5 years. I was paying child support prior to a court order as I knew I was getting a divorce and 1. Knew that my children needed the money and 2. Wanted to get ahead of anything that her lawyer was going to try and throw at me. I am sorry that the father of your child/ren is not living up to his responsibilities but please do not throw a generic term out there like that. There are more men who are doing the responsible thing than not. Also remember that there are Women out there who are court ordered to pay child support and not doing so also. If the father of your child/ren is not making his child support payments then all you have to do is go to the DA's office and swear out a warrant. Show up for court and he will be sent to jail. The court will more than likely order him to work release where they will collect your child/rens money and send you a check from that. Good Luck and I am sorry that you have to go through this.

Answer 5

All this male bashing sucks! - As a divorced father for 4 years now, I have never missed a monthly child support payment...but my issue is that while I must pay it, my ex has no obligation to show that the money goes to the children. - I have no interest in getting back with the ex, I just don't want to die with no financial assets while she's using a large chunk of the "child support" for a new car and house!

Answer 6

Because the ones who are like that are not able to and do not want to be responsible for ANYTHING. I know, my ex gives me excuses why he can't pay his share of certain expenses, then wonders why when he does decide to give me something, only when I'm being friendly with him, I just ignore it and don't take it. He knows exactly what he should be paying, and when, but chooses not to see that as a responsibility or priority. So I've accepted that I can't count on him for it, and I have to provide for my child myself. But then, he tells me if we go to court over our child, so he can have ordered visitation, I better not dare ask for child support, since I don't take his money when it's offered! Like I'm gonna sit there and take his money when all he does is make it a big hassle. He only pays anything when he chooses to, and only if he feels I "deserve" it! Makes total sense, right?! So I say forget it. I'll do everything on my own, and I have. I don't need him. Guys like that are just irresponsible and immature.

Answer 7

Because the state makes them pay extreme amounts. They wouldn't get so upset by it if it was manageable, but rarely is it manageable.
When my ex and I divorced, I was making approx. $1,100 a month. The state made me pay $615 a month in child support. That is more than half. I could not afford an apartment for three months and had to live out of my car. Even after I got an apartment, I then lost my car because I could not pay for it. Then I lost my job because I could not get to work. Then I defaulted on my credit cards. Then I lost my apartment again.

Tell me, how would YOU feel?

Answer 8

I have been paying my support faithfully every month for the past 6 years and have no problem supporting my child. Where i have the problem is when my ex comes to me in a brand new leather jacket, driving her new car, etc, etc, and tells me my son only has 2 pairs of pants and I have to get him more because she cant afford it. Why cant the mothers provide receipts to show where the CHILD support goes. I' m not paying SPOUSAL support

Answer 9

I think it is because a lot of them do not look at it as helping to support their child when the money goes to the ex and she actually spends it.

My daughter's ex, the father of her oldest, happens to be one of the good ones (though he is sometimes late with the money). My daughter needed it to help her and her daughter survive before she got married and often had to use it for rent. her ex did not object and even (w/o the new woman knowing) slipped her extra money a few times.

Now my daughter is able to put the checks directly into a separate account for things that her oldest may need. Cheerleading shoes, Scout camp, a prescription. Works well for them but I know it is not an option for most.

It's a territorial thing for guys, too, I think. They try to make a go of it when it is too late to avoid the responsibility they shirked before because they can't stand thinking of themselves to blame or that they may be a failiure.

Answer 10

Alot of men do not want to deal with the reality that they have children. So when you take them to court they get scared and they want to work things out because it is cheaper to keep you then to let you go...

I had a situation with my husband he left me for a week and I went to court to serve him with child support papers. He came home immediately after that. He said that he wants to work things out because he did not want me to get all that money that I am entitled too...

Men have responsibilties and women need too put they foot down and take them too court. They ok to get you pregnant but they refuse to help you financially...

Answer 11

I am not sure, but I know I would give my last dime to my child. My husband always says he wont give me that much, but do they really realize all that it takes to raise a child. My child is used to being spoiled and without his fathers income he would not be. I would expect more from him because of his income and I dont work and my son has special needs that have kept me from working. He has as much said he would quite his job. Women can do it with out child support we just should not have too.