would like to have a baby through artifical insemination?

Question

would like a child within the next two years...or more...but not sure if I'm ready to be a single mother...anyone who's been there or any advice? I already that once I'm financially secure I had hire a nanny when I work from home or run my own business..and I'll ensure to have great support groups but joining different mom's groups etc. Just don't think I need a man to do that. Women do it all the time. I was raised by a single mother..just circumstantial. I've been married now going through a divorce..and don't think I'll get married again...and almost 30 years and well don't want to wait too long...but I'm just newly single and want to enjoy life...HELP HERE. thanks.

Bear in mind I know it won't be easy..but I plan to have positive male role models in her life...as I didn't have which made me want to seek out my father which only turned out to be a mistake. So I realized that I can do it but the right way right?

Here's thought ~ what if my donor is someone I know but not in a relationship with and what if I have more than one child with that person through artifical insemination. What if he's a "known" donor or a donor that doesn't mind being sought out...that's possible too right?

Answer 1

while i'm not discounting your desire to have a child, as i'm sure it's very great, please take a moment to consider another perspective:

i am a product of a donor. i wish i weren't.

my mom too is a single mom by choice. i am her only child. she had me by intratubal insemination. she had many difficulties having me, but finally was successful. now that i'm older and on my search for the man i will most likely never know, along with siblings that i more than likely will never find, or at least not all of them, i know that being born in this way is not how any child ought to be. it is hell growing up not knowing if every man on the street could be "him" or having to ask every person you date what their dad did in his past (to make sure you're not dating your half-sibling). now i'm not saying that i don't love my mom- i will be the first to tell you that she is my very best friend. and i completely believe she is a brave woman. she did this all of her own accord, not telling my grandparents until after she was pregnant with me. however, if i could have been born any other way, i would do it in a heartbeat. however, that's not my choice and never was. but i can speak for the majority of all of us offspring that we would all have rathered been born from normal circumstances and had a chance to know our fathers. please reconsider. our pain is deep and everlasting. we have walk with an eternal identity crisis because we only know half of ourselves, and because there are pieces of us walking around that we'll never have contact with (our siblings). it is a very lonely feeling, i promise you.

i would advise you to look further into the situation of donor offspring, because no matter what, your child (or potential child) comes first. if you want what's best for it, you have to make a decision: do you want it to live with this pain? feel free to message me back if you would like more information, as i can refer many other offspring to you so that they can give you their stories and perspectives too.

remember, there is always adoption

Answer 2

I did this, and now my daughter is 18. I actually managed to stay home with her! I am crazy about her, but looking back I am not convinced single motherhood was a good idea. After she got into her mid teens, the absence of any father began to make itself felt. She went boy crazy, and I guess she still is. She's like a doormat with boys. I could never understand it, as I'm not that way at all. She told me that she's trying to find out what kind of guy she likes, but she's not using common sense. I really think she's trying to fill that void. It breaks my heart.
Of course, everybody is different.