Sudden problems with candles and asthma even though it was never a problem before?

Question

So, my boyfriend and I have lived together for 6 years. For the first 4 he has had breathing probs but wouldn't go to docs. We have always been big candle fans and have burned them nightly. He says he can't smell anything, so he doesn't care unless I burnt the house down lol. About 2 years ago he was doing some work and inhaled a ton of dust, landing him in hospital. He still says he can't smell anything, but now throws a huge fit and storms out if I light my candles and says it "sets him off" but I can burn them all day, blow them out and toss them in the freezer within 2 minutes of him getting home and he acts normal and fine, so its only when he actually see's the candle burning. He's always had the health issue but now everything we use to do bothers him terribly unless HE wants to do it.

Real deal or is he playing games?

as a side note, like I said, he has ALWAYS had asthma, and he just came home with a load of those crappy smelling plug ins! Geh!

He did start using an inhaler 2 years ago when sent into hospital, its the same type and make of candles we always had (bought a giant batch lot one year)

side note, I work in a candle shop now as well lol.

Answer 1

Asthma and allergies are much more common in people with a family history of asthma or allergies. The factors which worsen asthma vary from individual to individual. Each person with asthma should seek to determine exactly which factors cause their asthma to worsen. Common asthma triggers include:

Allergies. such as to house dust mites, cockroaches, cats, dogs, molds, mice, and grass, weed, and tree pollens
Infections. colds, influenza, and other respiratory viruses
Irritants. such as strong odors from perfumes or cleaning solutions, air pollution, and especially smoke from tobacco, incense, candles, or fires
Exercise. especially in dry or cold environments
Cold or dry weather and changes in temperature and/or humidity, such as with thunderstorms
Strong emotions. such as anxiety, laughter, or crying (which cause heavy breathing)
Reflux of acid from the stomach (GERD)
Pain medications. such as aspirin or NSAIDs (10% of those with asthma are aspirin and NSAID sensitive)

Answer 2

2

Answer 3

It's not a game, it's his feelings and his way of dealing with the situation. He just needs to find a better way of doing it.

It's hard enough trying to keep a relationship on balance and healthy for anyone. Dealing with health problems puts added strain on them, even if the health problems are only his perceptions, and not the 'real deal'.

The ideal thing to do would be to see a couples therapist for a few sessions. Maybe you could get to what is really bugging him, or at least sort out some good tatctics to handle his concerns in a way that takes your feelings into account more.

Of course, not every guy is open to therapy sessions, so the next best thing is for you to talk to him honestly and get everything off your chest, and encourage hime to do the same. Tell him how you feel about all this in a non-confrontational way. It might take awhile but I'm sure you can work it out.

Answer 4

I feel your pain. I've had asthma for 14 years now and have seen several doctors. The truth is, there is no known cure for asthma at the moment. But the symptoms can be prevented. It really depends on what causes your brother's asthma. Mine is usually dust and hot weather. But I think the universal method is using the control inhaler.

I cured my Asthma the natural way?

Answer 5

I have had asthma a very long time. Some years ago candles started bothering me, when they did not before. Anything scented now bothers me, years ago I could wear light perfume and now I even buy my husband unscented shaving cream because I am so sensitive to scents. Advancement of illness is difficult to deal with for both of you. Tell him you will try to be understanding of his needs, but if you do something he does not like he still needs to treat you with respect. It seems like his personality is the bigger problem.

Answer 6

Some candle wicks have a thin metal piece in them to hold the wick up. Most of these metal wicks are made of lead, and burning these type of candles could possibly cause respiratory effects ( lead inhalation ). Check your candles to see if they have this metal strip in the wick. If they do, throw them out and only burn candles that do not contain the metal strip.

Answer 7

I would say he has a real problem all right, but that doesn't mean he's not trying to play games too. Unfortunately, I've known several people who would do that.

Did the attittude problems start when he started bringing home the plug-ins? He could be reacting to that too. In which case he needs to get rid of them!

Meanwhile, he needs to go to the docs. Like it or not.

Good luck!

Answer 8

Both me and my husband have asthma and we have never had that problem. We burn candles every day and night. I think it may be more of a psychological issue with your guy. He thinks it's going to set him off when it really might not. My brother is the same way.

Answer 9

well, he could have developed a sensitivity to i guess... smoke coming from the candle, but his reaction -- throwing a fit, and storming out -- is just plain immature. if you have asthma, you're not going to immediately die when you get exposed to the allergen or something... that's just plain over-reacting if not paranoid.

but wait a minute -- so you mean, you can't light the candle, unless HE wants to? how old is he?

to answer your question -- he's playing games. it's just plain stupid and immature. my sister used to be allergic to dust, something she cannot avoid -- she goes into respiratory distress of course, she still talks to people and laughs with them while taking her nebulizer treatment. but she doesn't overreact up to a point of insanity as if she's going to die.

Answer 10

Sounds like somebody is playing games with you girlfriend,Man can act just like little boys and try to play us to get what they want,like they use to do with mommy,THATS if WE let THEM play us!Once a man gets use to there girls way and they know what worrys us,ect. Some will use it ,To get what they want to do,just like when they were little!Tell him,I live hear also and were gona set some New fair Rules,and then sit down with him and work out a shedule for your candles,ect.Good Luck,Hollywood