my partner and i are at logger heads should teenagers ask before helping themselves to you fridge etc?

Answer 1

I was always brought up to ask before taking ANYTHING from the fridge - including drinks. However, I did have quite a humble upbringing, so its not like the food could be replaced easily.

I'd say that its just polite to ask - but thats me.

Answer 2

What you are asking is should you expect the kids to treat your home and your pantry with some respect, which is not unreasonable.

Of course your kids can eat. Feeding the world is a whole other expense. Tell the kids what they can have in the kitchen that isn't part of your meals. Set these things in one place where they are not easily confused with stuff that is off limits. When it's gone, it's gone.

Or. Do your groceries and then hand the kids a couple of dollars, well, maybe more than a couple, enough to order a pizza. Explain that they need to leave the groceries alone and that this is their food money. Now they can have friends pitch in and order food for themselves as needed. Once again, they need to have the friends pitch in. When its gone its gone til next grocery day.

Answer 3

My home is a haven for teens that like to hang out with my own teens. I learned early on to prepare snack etc... and call them to the kitchen to eat. They soon learned the routine of being called and being given what was available for them. I also tell my sons and daughter what is theirs to drink and have bought a small fridge to go in their room for that purpose. They in turn tell their friends that once the bedroom fridge is empty they must move on to water.
If I am not cooking for them like fries, chicken nuggets, pizza rolls etc. Then I give the kids the chips etc and say That's it guys and they usually just say Thank You.
I don't have a problem with the help themselvers anymore and they keep coming back so I suppose they aren't offended either.
MY own children have free reign to go in the fridge as long as it isn't close to dinner time.

Answer 4

SAWYER-it is not selfishness at all,it is respect-and obviously by your answer,i can see you have very little..If people don't send their kids into the big wide world with respect for other peoples belongings,other peoples feelings,then the kids are going to think that they can take all they like,treat people how they like-and get away with it-the toilet is a different matter,that is a natural function,and has nothing to do with asking pemission.Flybynite...yes,most definitely the kids should ask before they go in the fridge,you set the boundary's as it is your place,and they have to learn respect.

Answer 5

There is VERY little information here but I am reading between the lines. If I get it wrong I apologise in advance.
This sounds like a territorial thing. Either his kids are in your fridge or yours are in his. If I am right you are probably having difficulty integrating into a new stable family unit after divorce.
This is the root of your trouble.
I hope this helps. Have a good week-end.

Answer 6

i used to have this problem,when i went to make a special recipe or meal half the ingredients were missing,i didn't want to make them feel like they couldn't have anything, just wanted a bit of consideration,so one day i ate all their chocolate bars and treats (well i hide most of them lol)and when they asked me about it i just shrugged and put my music on LOUD.I enjoyed this so much i took it to other areas ,i borrowed their stuff and didn't put it back, i played my music in the car ,i went out and didn't tell them were i was going ,,by the way they were teenagers ,they are married now with families of their own and we still laugh about it .ohhh and they still ask if they can have stuff from the fridge and so do their children (well most of the time )sorry sooo long an answer......

Answer 7

Well my mum made me ask, and i actually agree with her. I never took something without asking first. Its only food, but still, my mum needed to know what was being eaten and what we were eatign too much of, no wonder kids are fat as anything these days, parents dont have no control or rules. I DEFINATELY think kids should ask first. and i am only 18 by the way. so any teenager that says its unfair, is just plain spoilt and got no respect,.

Answer 8

Yes, we were taught to ask, because my parents did not want us to be fat kids. Also because my mum would want to know what had gone from the fridge so that it could be replaced. I think it is wrong for kids to just help themselves, we were allowed fruit or drinks whenever we wanted them, but not to just raid the fridge whenever

Answer 9

I'm not sure if I understand the question right...
I think teenagers have a mind of their own anyway, to make them ask for trivial things just ridicules them. They dont have to ask to go to the toilet do they? There should be rules of course but I think teenagers should also be slowly treated as adults otherwise they will seek this acceptance elsewhere...

Answer 10

i think it shows respect if they do,but io spose how old they are makes the difference.if say 13 14 15 16 then id say yes they should have to ask but 17 18 19 then there into adulthood and may find it a bit like there getting treated like babies having to ask,but untill 16 they are still young so yes i think they should